 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!. F& o- Q l/ o* V3 |
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写) q; i( m6 A" d2 i% F& Q# I% C
0 j( c: S! T0 t8 R! R! z+ z$ G
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.* m' r+ B; R* ~( A
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫3 z! e& j* g6 S4 I' `- y5 r5 p1 F
9 R/ Y: `, n4 e1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it% L) B$ c/ p4 C b5 k
down.
) Y' t% N4 l2 }! }We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about + ?( m2 c7 o5 n r* i# _
you
) W* a0 @4 d, y; R) g. J; i1 F/ Aleaving it down.
: h7 x* z# g. ^, h* {- v/ ?1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
# y2 V' W* O& @' R* J
* g4 h' d- y! C m. f$ N0 R2 P1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.% x L& }# @) I+ G2 w0 x7 b
Let it be.- j' q' j6 g5 W# k
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去6 u1 u# N/ d7 @4 j
! s! e, _8 ^6 U) C# L- g1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it7 Y$ u' O7 l5 S; m4 O0 q5 M
that way.4 n: e" I+ w9 W% u2 D5 Z! X
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
3 T; t( J( r# Z, V& g$ G. w6 M9 S: |0 x( w! U
1. Crying is blackmail.9 Y' y; {- m% t; r4 v
1，哭泣是敲诈
$ p8 S1 @) L2 x# _% @/ B, d% Q& \2 J9 q- i6 q
1. Ask for what you want.
3 i% I2 ]3 e ]. H4 X6 rLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!) x+ m( a8 ~7 P+ D; Z6 ~6 d' _
Strong hints do not work!( B a3 L4 y) ~9 h( V3 A
Obvious hints do not work!- A& j2 K N b ]
Just say it!+ E' H# Z) ^9 v
1，你想要什么就说. t1 p/ S$ V5 m2 B/ I u& }9 {6 W
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
- \; P4 w5 c4 f- p( d/ F5 `! |* c, G. t2 p- a3 c& v
1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ! L, ^" V( ]& P+ ~3 \% x& q
question.+ f0 ^7 J2 ^ F, f; d
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
/ `$ t0 Q/ c( h4 r' A4 M* U9 l& K: I" E5 m# t
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's, q8 |/ }- l+ t6 G" Q
what we do.
3 M) y: H7 m2 v3 T9 q4 aSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
% G; G2 X) Z& L7 F& a1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。0 Z, G# \" z, y P3 B
! } I! A: I5 @$ s& F
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.; Q% G: Z- c2 c1 I) \ V' n6 `4 w
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去9 x e* P- _* H, K+ P
# j& h) {: i r4 m/ i" B6 T: R
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.2 n6 M- E) L, ]2 O Y; }
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
2 U) Q- Z' N- L) `0 ]# y我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了" O# o" _. {5 b# ]1 J
1 d/ ^) ~, r$ ^( x/ }
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us" o/ O9 Q5 D0 D5 a+ _. `
to act like soap opera guys.
- |) L# f5 x! V) L# G1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
! X/ p, h$ L t" K w, }" o0 X& u) v/ Q: `
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.3 R; t/ _1 Z7 H5 d0 P
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们, B9 C" f. P: c
/ l+ s j! T" k9 `# @' w' ]# A8 z1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
9 G4 B( s- \8 Z5 x: ^makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
B8 v. {1 V9 P2 C Q8 M7 u! p4 f1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。1 ~; G' G. r2 R7 w. K
/ e# d- N3 b/ T6 ~2 Y+ W
（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）" l# K. j+ @, o+ m
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
* B+ h& e V+ J9 Mdone. Not both.
: W, k- c6 t9 R A( P8 t4 @* qIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.( F9 j1 k# \; I
% V) U: B1 A3 ]5 n7 X p
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
, b( K$ F; q" Ncommercials. p4 Y/ x" y' A* p. k. ~
# ]6 {! x) Y+ Q
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
2 O2 P C9 B- _$ G0 Q) E
: _, T& V) n! v& O% d5 A, P, J1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.* m. M+ {6 s* `: \
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.+ Q# ^# u4 J- l: T" L
We have no idea what mauve is.
- i( a4 G: \% ^7 M
* e2 d3 U+ d* K% [ r- A1 w1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.0 _: b5 R* v( e, s
1 H- T% q, Z! e& E z+ Y1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like! H& D$ x/ `7 _# t5 G
nothing's wrong.- P' K1 i( ~. n8 s$ u
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.7 b1 a" X; s `$ q
# w [6 E& V y5 j7 B1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
; m7 V( N7 R6 m) i8 v8 nyou don't want to hear.0 m4 x F$ B4 F
: ^ C. C2 J! V4 l1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is) ~# H: a; d; K% ~$ H( r- Z
fine...Really.2 v3 k" R* L. ~+ |4 N
; {# G7 S1 C u3 n! k1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
8 D% R& d( z4 z0 Y# Kdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.# E! C5 J& q3 }0 ?$ ?6 x
. `1 X8 M1 k( q1. You have enough clothes.2 t0 H: K; d- J$ ~; V% }
1 U" w9 W6 t+ r" f7 k) d" H/ P+ y6 W1. You have too many shoes.# c" ?% o4 n% k" ~ N$ n3 r* S! R
; `7 _# c& I2 m" J' J! q$ Q, T/ V1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!+ Z7 s" \3 Z0 R x2 J- _+ ?
- N- E5 b& E( R' D# t# l$ k1. Thank you for reading this." W. ~( [7 x+ f- P3 e" O' l
# ]. S h% G6 n& f" F) C
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;5 A6 M& m# Y6 M5 I* G2 W4 t
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
! |! i7 y4 \1 b+ v9 \2 E
9 E. y8 R6 s$ v; I' M# n* [Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
( M1 ~4 j9 S dPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
