 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!0 g6 }* W9 }7 }3 i+ M* d% J
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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% {, ]- g8 H5 G. M9 R# q( a G1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.+ l# ~" T0 {* l+ G+ H7 x0 T
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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. o6 m* U* a( B. @) M1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
( Y! Y2 d7 I" G( w) {% Ldown.
% Q/ s3 [: Y2 q: n+ AWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about ) r8 b# v- P. ^8 q. ^$ e/ c: Y
you5 n/ L; j; T$ w5 F
leaving it down.' s* A0 W, x; G
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？6 E: X' P& L# g: ~
$ A3 b6 J) V3 N1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.( f" J2 ?2 d, L- O! {0 S
Let it be.
& o( \- n5 I0 ~# A- b3 f5 {1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
9 k1 v. i- E- x- Y% I8 r0 }that way.
1 H* z0 p( w# y, N4 R1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！2 `& C8 r& I( _, u
4 c8 z! L) u. U |8 O7 O* ]; `1. Crying is blackmail.
: F9 i* j* f8 B# C1，哭泣是敲诈
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6 M$ B) N9 L& \2 V1. Ask for what you want.+ v/ N( W3 S: O& [
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!1 O6 D9 Z2 C$ x. w7 @: u, B" n
Strong hints do not work!# V1 {4 R2 a. @; n
Obvious hints do not work!& B9 n& h$ |, J% s
Just say it!
7 }3 B/ F% ]% d' G" X& M- ` N1，你想要什么就说
5 k; x7 C- h& `, x我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
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& T7 h- C& _! i# }5 Z5 _. q1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）# a9 h0 y$ N, W( D `
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's+ C) a4 B# B+ ~' u5 @
what we do.; a' R& \6 ]3 }. e
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
7 n" h$ |1 h, B0 h* [. g1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。+ |/ i& I7 \- c# t
* U% ~' W2 z, M6 Q- z1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
: [ y+ J$ h' ?9 M7 n$ x) e# C1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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, [: D* u( m# z" S2 i1 o1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
" C! C1 ^! F8 o: o' j' ]1 _In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
% R' y1 F" m# H3 D我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us7 T+ S& A r8 i- m
to act like soap opera guys.0 \3 T3 m# m( b; c9 G, K/ y2 d& ~- y
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
/ _! ?, w2 M/ F6 j1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们# E3 g# y1 w; Y
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
9 w8 s1 X6 ?* U8 {+ Wmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
4 o+ E1 w0 B) x8 W9 H1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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: U2 ]& p; I+ z. ^5 ~. i) B（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
# Z# E2 X( O0 w0 {* ~; l; R1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
- ~* P; ~: e) h+ U; x# Ydone. Not both.
2 S1 I( W! o0 X! D5 S4 @0 G0 L& a: sIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
0 n! J% r" J. C8 ^/ T; Y0 {" X8 Ocommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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" r# d$ O! m2 `8 {% u+ b; @# _1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.2 L$ |! ?2 G( ?, {- ]5 ?. {
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
' h0 N; G" ]4 L* i% r3 `; l/ ^We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.! n6 X8 b& z- p
9 P0 E9 \' n6 d1 Y& K1 w/ |% N1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
$ r/ [/ R4 E; ~7 {. h$ y0 j3 fnothing's wrong.
! X/ C9 R( R. |( E- T2 V w8 }We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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, \" p9 G, O$ y( R* x5 l1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer( t6 R2 s( y3 A+ \3 H: F- O" K
you don't want to hear.7 g5 h7 z6 M- @0 y
6 W- z8 \4 z4 E+ c! f1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is$ f) _3 h: [; ?* B9 R' X
fine...Really.
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5 w+ l8 R- @* G* S0 b, n- x. r7 _; u1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to- q0 k/ g' Z) I$ I4 A
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.+ `' k3 W8 H, f0 s2 }
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1. You have enough clothes.
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/ _$ u4 V- T: X1. You have too many shoes.. m5 d6 w+ t) R& }5 c
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.1 ^0 Y/ a* |$ t. u+ M4 a" V
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
7 L, X8 B6 |: C) _ T3 |3 q* ~But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.9 k, ^" b5 y) `! A
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.% |" \% M& h6 O f
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
