 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
% P3 T" E6 o% v4 f( K请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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2 p. I0 ?5 z: ]1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
% r7 a* Y6 R. p8 ^5 ^, t! ]1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫6 y# d7 X8 r0 L1 O/ d: ]
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
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We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about / c7 U6 R- N; }
you' `7 c6 {; i% z
leaving it down.7 Z: J6 \- l( V/ W
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？. B& P+ j' q. e6 b, f! D9 L3 h v
5 B9 w4 D0 j1 ~( M1 s( c7 ~( F1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.3 O9 M1 `! Z, P$ r' g# T; \
Let it be.: B, ?* ]" M: d
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
% G: X; }1 B! n) Cthat way." b% t( ~( N, W; r! o6 c6 ]
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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7 \) D: s1 }9 J& G! {2 F" V, l1. Crying is blackmail.2 _2 M7 K5 M9 t: l4 G
1，哭泣是敲诈3 [6 a9 b( f& Y3 [1 a0 ~+ T
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1. Ask for what you want.
1 t/ |- a: M8 Z- `Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!9 B& V$ @7 f+ f9 A8 _
Strong hints do not work!
8 \7 `; K8 H }( ^; YObvious hints do not work!: X) v4 t+ Y& A8 f/ d. ?4 v
Just say it!3 |& q1 w8 D6 s3 e% q
1，你想要什么就说
8 Q/ T7 T7 V0 u3 ]1 }+ p+ F2 j我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！' D1 J& H% H, ^" N
, ?# q) Q. Z" |. o; o- d$ g/ a1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every & u# {7 u- j; @# A& j3 l
question.5 ^. N: N6 x5 M( _4 m! ~
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）2 q2 w2 Z0 ~: W0 c4 i
3 d: F! |/ Q) J9 i6 m: N" i1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
# S" _5 }( p, Z5 k( V wwhat we do.2 i- q% Y4 q, r
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
" F, M: }: w: h, M* L" j5 l1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
0 M" W) o( p0 V" _* o" J1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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# ^# P: o, J' M1 J5 A& j' ~1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.! g6 c2 h& J4 [4 l/ k
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.# V0 G7 c7 K8 i3 ]$ H( E( }, C- R
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了6 ?; t' M3 C- e( A
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us" E+ Y6 i* W5 I: _& P
to act like soap opera guys.3 p* m3 O9 L/ q) P
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
2 d8 G9 X2 Y) h6 Q7 `! V0 U, T1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways1 s C% v/ e& i" H; }( B
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
" [0 O# k6 y; S! W# \1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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* p# r+ a9 s2 I（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
$ o; S: h$ x2 \' D4 m* O* k1 t1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it/ V3 l- m+ N3 `
done. Not both.
7 v/ w4 H( D( e& O; RIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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+ d/ A1 B5 l4 {+ o1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during4 P& I% _% L6 H, i) I3 W; {
commercials.
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0 h6 G, D- D( l9 v7 V X1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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0 [ F) i8 f) h% v1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
: r$ p% Z4 B; p1 SPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.: b- r3 x5 d7 N" b6 {0 d- C
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that. Z" v: w' k& w7 Y
8 ~! T9 p* C- C! ^/ v1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like# z$ L1 _4 s# z. R! z. f6 V
nothing's wrong.
; j7 w* s+ B5 h3 UWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer0 q7 N+ i! F- k L
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is" ` m! i/ c' ?, D! [3 t) N
fine...Really.
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% t6 N9 j% B0 y4 U4 u8 f1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
3 _! Q6 V6 O$ Y( cdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes." b$ s& w4 q( |- z" t6 B, b
: O! R1 C" Q$ U) m0 |: w1. You have too many shoes.- l0 B( h4 d. ]2 H
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!. Y6 [$ V' F# |; j! {4 Y i; e
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1. Thank you for reading this.3 T7 T0 { K5 M8 H/ B6 y& X
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
) O2 J& v4 S6 p) g* @4 nBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.! B3 Q' u9 V8 b, }5 Y. t
' B% {1 j8 f. U" Y4 t- hPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.! e& Z% X' p. ]. H! i
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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