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Tiger s Holiday Poem) \/ a7 N. U4 h% B
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
2 P( j7 g) u* S8 j8 lTiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
& S9 Q4 o) Q. f# V) P5 }' E$ }She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
( o1 {7 k; q# ACause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.8 {6 r$ u( s0 g4 S5 U
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.
+ R5 c; A+ U( o" M! [0 ]Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
; d4 |3 X& \( N' Z8 v/ UHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
! d) X- A& d2 p: S7 fWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.$ R9 O+ j: F7 ?$ x; h; D5 @/ W8 S [
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,/ ?4 M% V h. g: u2 s
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
/ Y7 j' Z! j( ^* GWith hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
: r9 d# J" ]! h9 i; zWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.1 L$ b( X# v$ V: M4 O; u
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
6 l8 H1 \; t$ J' S; \2 pTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden . ~9 d0 }' T( _! B! Z" t) d
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,! m \ d+ Q- a2 J- |. I e
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
7 q g6 E. N; XShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,; ?/ M0 P8 _9 o- `" F6 o
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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