 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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& g! d2 P# P2 t5 [5 JI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years., v& e# V% v/ }
8 N' I+ `9 \# y& c: yI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:$ o2 Q( S: K# q2 [
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?": |$ |9 `- b/ ]* m6 Y2 ^. \
7 a$ n- r' H' b1 YI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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& w! Q+ R; F# c E' X$ p9 l% m3 ^"What's the 2nd Amendment?"' Y" o$ k+ I% Z( Y8 T1 f& ~
; ^- s3 \( j% n8 nI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ @$ [: J) L& f4 B/ W5 R
6 f0 p% F( U, p& E"What is Roe vs. Wade?"8 s2 W. t5 V, O
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."2 _4 S3 @# S6 c |
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”: X9 L* P# T5 _* X5 b4 p
: f# J) P& ~* f* M- [2 h g) pThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.2 |$ [7 a" Q6 K+ ~ I
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Thank you very much!. _8 J! t ~" w5 I4 P
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ |# l% @5 D( q$ ~ {# u
0 j9 u: G3 \4 H% O N! W3 }1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.% i1 o% k$ J1 A9 x( b' O, w. h" I1 }
8 q8 b" ]* E* t! T9 H"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.. n0 l) }( |" V: Q! ], ?
6 Y5 G( ^ Q" V A6 c0 b4 p) jJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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$ o% R5 j) _3 n2 yRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.$ j- T% m+ Y" [3 {7 V& e# j4 @4 [
1 w6 g* ]! Q% q6 g+ I! }The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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