 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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# r0 j4 n( M7 A' HI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.3 I- ~6 ~3 ~6 A* ?
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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9 C4 M8 W5 a8 r: ~6 J P+ j* f"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ O% U& ~ ]4 V+ N( V9 i% N7 \
6 v. [: m5 D$ ?- v& `/ NAnd the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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, F; C& E" p+ Z4 K: F/ l. }I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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/ L6 M2 R, }2 ?9 r, U2 l"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?' e: Q# `+ y Q u. A3 ]- `
( L& Q) }, Q* _I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever! L% z$ T, r) ?. u2 @
4 k# ~# g6 J6 `+ K6 z$ U# a! Z0 D2 TI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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: ^9 d9 p- G7 t9 e K. i& v% HSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"! Z+ d! l; }) D1 B) F3 Y! ]9 o4 W
. O5 Q6 ]$ y: I) A1 MNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”# _! y) X8 W" L! m( W, {
- m: |5 w# z% D% NThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.3 d2 p/ C5 h* B" e- U8 R
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Thank you very much!& n( e5 D, k' W, N9 |
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:0 [0 `0 L. t" c8 Z8 \
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.1 q5 W7 R1 w/ s J9 B
W# o: k; h" _+ P! I2 l2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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4 F+ Q" @, L" |, J* f) n"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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* z) r2 |4 a" q$ V, dJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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k! n3 I: }# A4 d6 ]: `+ d, Q! }9 BRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
