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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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& g! d2 P# P2 t5 [5 JI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years., v& e# V% v/ }

8 N' I+ `9 \# y& c: yI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:$ o2 Q( S: K# q2 [
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?": |$ |9 `- b/ ]* m6 Y2 ^. \

7 a$ n- r' H' b1 YI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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& w! Q+ R; F# c  E' X$ p9 l% m3 ^"What's the 2nd Amendment?"' Y" o$ k+ I% Z( Y8 T1 f& ~

; ^- s3 \( j% n8 nI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ @$ [: J) L& f4 B/ W5 R

6 f0 p% F( U, p& E"What is Roe vs. Wade?"8 s2 W. t5 V, O
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."2 _4 S3 @# S6 c  |
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”: X9 L* P# T5 _* X5 b4 p

: f# J) P& ~* f* M- [2 h  g) pThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.2 |$ [7 a" Q6 K+ ~  I
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Thank you very much!. _8 J! t  ~" w5 I4 P
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:$ |# l% @5 D( q$ ~  {# u

0 j9 u: G3 \4 H% O  N! W3 }1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.% i1 o% k$ J1 A9 x( b' O, w. h" I1 }

8 q8 b" ]* E* t! T9 H"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.. n0 l) }( |" V: Q! ], ?

6 Y5 G( ^  Q" V  A6 c0 b4 p) jJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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$ o% R5 j) _3 n2 yRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.$ j- T% m+ Y" [3 {7 V& e# j4 @4 [

1 w6 g* ]! Q% q6 g+ I! }The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
) s& j( a( p6 o8 J6 C8 fa young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
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鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
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鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
7 Q% O# a+ I# m8 o" A7 C3 D怎么理解?
8 \- a0 b& X' i% W* k8 z0 V& G) a* J50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
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鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
6# cyz0116 3 `# K1 V8 E! |8 F% ^
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* S$ C$ E# E9 d: R# i; {4 c不离婚,白头到老
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鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
: r5 C6 Y. F8 d" ~" t# r怎么理解?0 h- i" ]: k- `
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
9 ]9 u' q6 [0 _. |cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
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鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 9 `8 N5 U3 g  q) _8 ~$ ^

( ^( i1 B% t  x8 @- m0 g' D我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
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鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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