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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:: j! W% h% Q0 `7 M. z
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.) p) }, @. D. S0 O) \: n2 r& C
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. _5 s. G, L- O( [8 P, G2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.$ m( D) L. h3 T+ \/ {0 [' l( o# H
* W5 t0 O7 u* u% G/ e5 d4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.6 ?( w3 I* ]: r# L& E9 D
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8 j6 s1 ]$ L+ |0 Q0 Z6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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% p+ {- E# I, H7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.( S; z' a+ |" X
! J) O. g8 {& `/ ?+ P6 Y4 J0 q& ]8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
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& Q8 Z, B8 D. ~( B5 C t9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.$ [, R# P8 _/ _9 A' h
7 s4 P' }% o- U- _10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.( X% n6 C7 ~3 @% y- Y. B& l
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13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!; w, @( r8 l0 B9 k* n3 k5 N3 B
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And; last, but not least!)
* |( E- J% I7 |7 ^15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
