English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
1 Z" F* U9 ?- N+ N7 I" g2 y
Let's face it
1 w7 C/ ~7 m* a' N" [- W  j7 fEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
# S4 S2 }. I0 CAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
. A1 n' X  x& t9 D0 LEnglish muffins were not invented in England
0 v# }/ x/ g2 s7 N* d8 |2 pFrench fries were not invented in France.
9 u8 m' ?# J6 ^/ b
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
: J1 A) H0 u( [9 H% jQuicksand takes you down slowly
' }9 t# V, P. B3 \: L0 m' HBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
) I- A0 U" g' B# G* R2 d" c
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
2 `0 u- g7 @. f1 H0 x; ]# OIf the plural of tooth is teeth
; h8 H& b7 {, p4 z$ T3 aShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
! u) j2 W! a+ Q' X* \If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
( s0 U/ X( E: S. |( \' p9 f3 eWhy do people recite at a play
, a9 O+ E. I  I% HYet play at a recital?
9 O8 S' q* A4 r8 ?Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
5 G  l8 k- X  w
. T! e. U  F) U% i" aYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
# f$ }8 D  e# b0 b9 Q- A$ GAnd in which you fill in a form
5 R) h/ Z6 t7 d4 J2 L  a( Q0 M- ?9 ]: |By filling it out
8 G5 t+ q4 y  F4 PAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
( F% C7 i+ f% Y+ p, A3 _3 k
5 |! a; k$ S, G8 ?English was invented by people, not computers
: ]: V; X- R: `) FAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
& b1 Y) P( B% p8 M4 }But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
( c5 q. H! B" A6 u/ X/ F+ w* ABut when I wind up this observation,
7 R8 O1 b! ?3 u$ i! C1 i5 HIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
2 X, H+ J: Q- x  u, R  |1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
- O6 T$ `/ L5 c2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
$ z* [2 |  j3 F其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2 I( ]3 [2 A8 E4 O5 s2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

& p+ i# a/ P; W' Z; L  @. Q谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
4 J0 O2 m0 b: B& u实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

免费杀毒软件下载酷我音乐盒wps金山毒霸2009下载免费金山毒霸~！!~！!！!！!

沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

8 N8 ~8 x0 @" t* x
  一民工大便不通去医院作检查，医生检查后给此人开了一个药方，民工到取药处一看是一卷手纸，不解，医生说：以后不要再用水泥袋擦屁股了！
) k1 `" l0 F$ K
2 P3 T* S- r* e$ k% h( b- I
( B2 x- }8 B. x7 Z" z-------------------------
3 T, L9 n& M7 P9 g8 S8 za 传奇世界私服, b WoW Gold, c 传奇私服, d 传世私服, e wow gold