Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:
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- i  N- w% k/ C; z3 n1 v1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
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: I' \- H: T" P& r6 w8 z2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

7 w& X5 g, u# s+ l. I, V* s3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
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% n0 w' m% D( ?' N2 I4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

+ y3 S  m0 J; L4 @6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
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; \0 S, h8 ~! L# N  i* L7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

* Q0 |8 X+ ~1 G) `7 j8. I pay your salary!
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# h7 |6 m& S6 T9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

% W* ]* k1 C! y) r  g1 x10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
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. R" k6 z4 e; N4 D12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"