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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
* \2 |; x2 ?; k$ b) R2. Mostly to clean the house.
2 \& O* r& z L8 Z; v) {7 l7 w3 k3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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How did God make mothers? 9 L! h5 n- D& F& N. `! v5 V
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.( E+ Q$ Q5 m0 t) g" H+ t1 V
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 4 ~+ a% j/ g3 X+ ]
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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0 G5 R+ {, r3 i; x: E# _What ingredients are mothers made of ? 7 x' J) R! U8 g# z3 k% f8 E* S& y( t
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 9 f( t: c, D. |+ r! {
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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+ c# _% s5 @2 ^" s7 l8 |+ W5 ~Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
' B" F4 V! [$ j) s0 N8 }2 d/ i1. We're related.
: w9 e5 E: b& X) }+ B) k- I J2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 9 [4 n* E4 |- W; V
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What kind of little girl was your mom? & W7 _( z' b0 u( j
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
3 y) A% n/ E( s( H# T2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. ) W. {: s2 l" R& t3 A
3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
* m: [' M/ Z1 b6 q" c, k" ^4 B, P1. His last name.( f T: \& W0 J
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?6 K5 c0 B; [ U% M% E: f8 W% r2 P
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 8 U, m% Y% O1 t* |' T- S
0 {4 H% G1 p M6 {- C8 H' g' | @Why did your mom marry your dad?
4 x% W+ }! x8 @6 K1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
+ K* X2 d3 c% m- T$ b7 p2. She got too old to do anything else with him. + _/ s6 O' d, L) a/ Q
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. & k0 J7 f W" V) q
$ H: h* t0 Y# d* J7 i1 z- L& EWho's the boss at your house? / l9 l A/ g9 m
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
6 J. {$ Q/ e2 d" m! a0 x+ K8 Q Y2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.) M: F6 S3 f/ n' p9 ?/ C" W6 @- C
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. / _, v2 i x/ F: b$ ~/ m7 Y
5 O$ C" f1 y# ZWhat's the difference between moms & dads? g9 A2 h4 I# e. T( o
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
7 Z! _3 { A8 y, n. Z( |, C# g7 {" y7 e2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.5 s' v5 Y6 g9 s* A5 Q5 g. ~9 [
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
# s3 g) W- J, y/ P# \6 W4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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4 u& C( @5 z7 h+ f, y6 xWhat does your mom do in her spare time? . b5 V1 ]- g; ?5 _
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
* W* ?5 i, Y6 o1 t: o, u- h2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 3 K$ X |( M9 u- L
0 w$ J# `- S( n* s$ LWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? - F/ i' Q8 |$ m, W6 R$ G
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
! W" O3 j# M, @0 k2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
+ \2 W0 ^$ B* l- {2 L1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. ) s; c1 `1 @8 t# L: i. Y% h
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
) S% }# G# b4 K% O# n- l6 Z3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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