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4 s! U- `; T2 L/ B' L/ R! IWhy did God make mothers?2 {. R: R; M, W8 h' ~( R0 J
0 u7 h5 w2 I8 G6 B, m( s/ b: H" M! Y1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
4 D# K0 p4 o4 S* {0 o) s$ k. B# X2. Mostly to clean the house. . |) s0 O' g& k) F1 m# l
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 9 l1 i$ c0 T3 x5 K3 B
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How did God make mothers? 1 z' g+ C2 N7 i: ~1 A
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
7 l, S& H1 }2 c* o V( \( F! g2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3 }* J' A6 O7 T1 Q7 _/ y3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. ' o1 u0 D7 |# G, d" s E: ^, ~
) o% o4 A8 W$ R R# K8 yWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? , `" G; A2 S2 g& T
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 0 D! V! J7 S3 M" T) V9 m# e# z
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 6 `- B8 q: H- b r8 g7 d
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
( A6 r1 X" {3 g' ~4 E/ N1. We're related.4 n- @: X" a' q9 ?4 r
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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1 z0 V& C& l( d) ^What kind of little girl was your mom?
( `% E: Z1 J" Q" y/ J% I1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
3 [ w6 N! Z/ P) g( P2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 0 a' g# z5 e8 b) L
3. They say she used to be nice. ( @( m7 o6 D! ?1 C
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? . H. v& O/ J2 K4 K6 M3 w, e8 @
1. His last name.6 K6 Y3 E/ U3 e9 S6 g) t' S
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
1 M6 X; [# t- @" e3 P3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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# n- D2 B q1 u: N6 aWhy did your mom marry your dad?
9 j9 x4 {0 n* K5 }, \) x& O1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
+ [6 y) Y* H$ X4 s' I2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3 C) R1 N$ X/ _9 K6 z4 D% q3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? 9 U* U& z3 t+ X7 e n
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. : h4 f) m4 i! M" J! |
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.4 d- D u3 A s% B1 f( B
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. 1 N" h! y* @5 y/ m# T" j+ A
, U! N4 K+ V5 I+ z- L% U- D$ g% kWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
% q' l! J1 U/ o/ D1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. ( r5 q$ I2 J$ ` [: E B6 e7 b
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
g o" c& I6 Z& n# }3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4 S1 X( Y$ K; k9 H, ?4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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8 n% d4 s6 @% D/ jWhat does your mom do in her spare time? / L8 u6 u! R9 f7 _1 @
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
+ Z( A& ^2 [) i! ?0 U `2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? ( |/ c& H5 A& A& N
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.; \- R! g& H3 ~3 s
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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% v k! L/ ], P* {If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
, ~9 u$ A8 P! A$ |" u: ~' K) u1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. * j: H( X5 k8 U2 ^# m8 j# i
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
6 c# J! _& n6 G5 c" D3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. 2 P- {! S2 T# H$ y
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