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NEW RULES FOR ENTERING ALBERTA$ i$ l- D6 F2 w* a
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; `- j* h- m, w: j4 _0 [7 g3 P 1. Bring your own house.. p) [" U* l6 N( S6 u l6 Y
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2. If going to the Oil Sands, bring your own house, school and
$ M" e* @7 ]3 D; f3 Whospital.: k9 C1 ^: Q+ X& F- D. K
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3. If going to Edmonton , wear your flak jacket. This is the murder
/ N$ }3 \; }: `: ?0 V4 |5 icapital of Canada .# F$ q) R4 }- h5 r7 A0 A
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4. If driving to Edmonton, it is also the auto theft center of Canada .. k) q- K+ e1 b! i7 t! z: l
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5. If you are bringing drugs, head to West Edmonton Mall, the drug6 c; B- L# D0 N
capital of Canada .7 w" r. N& {$ ^
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6. If you are looking for work, look no further. Minimum wage is6 d+ w) F, ]) ]* b, i: r* n
$8.00/hour.
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7. If you work downtown, parking costs $10.00/hour." ]' c Z$ ?, e: ^+ i
" W7 p% ?- Q! o; C' l 8. If you are able to buy a house in Calgary , why not spend the money3 s. Z1 Q; H1 N K6 R, r% ^8 h
on a 15 year holiday ?
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9. If you drive a Hummer, look out. We sit amongst the highest gas7 [, i3 l5 q+ `
prices in Canada . (So much for The Alberta Advantage)# E$ Y. }* t1 @5 P2 q9 Z
* i* b$ @7 T" e10. In Edmonton we have 5 hospitals. 10 years ago we had 7. Don't come
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+ g) k% [$ V3 z: I0 C0 E11. In Calgary, the population has exploded. The last road was paved 121 C9 z- R7 y' H
years ago. Calgary is a no-parking zone.
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7 U D" e0 U0 p& V `2 M THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON :
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8 \. v3 P/ E. y, F" r6 t1 c; U" Z+ z1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: " E-MIN-TIN ".- Y: }& r" D8 ~' Q
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00am to noon. The evening rush hour2 U1 `+ i7 r: i% |; g3 E- C9 {' U
is from noon to 8:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning.
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3 . Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its# J S- F8 L# @
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
4 B+ s2 @3 o2 p3 _muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
4 \6 z+ r' O4 V0 f$ n4 ego second. However, south-west Edmonton , SUV-driving, cell
( x2 }3 a' x0 b: X3 B2 jphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.7 Y6 g9 O) k; u1 n$ y
; P/ M, y& E5 D; c" ^4 . If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,. B( |1 m: ^# D% D" I
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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5 . Never honk at anyone. Ever! Seriously! It's another offense that
( p- H, |9 k9 @% G+ C: w' wcan get you shot.3 j$ g1 X3 U0 G% _5 A4 f! U
G$ _4 N& M4 `7 l* ]6 U( J$ Y/ J, q6 . Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton . Detour- t4 S( ~5 h9 ?% T& T4 ~
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
* w$ D( @: ~( H3 K/ {! Q' Nday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and; p8 o. m B, O3 M9 Y
more construction starts everyday.7 T% I ?& e/ I. L6 d+ B) V$ s
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7 . Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats,
- B2 |7 d+ N# a8 O: ~9 O7 w) \( Xdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,! d4 d1 A1 s0 z+ \" N$ W5 E7 D4 m$ z
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.0 b% I- G0 E; v& a/ Y1 G
( l$ i+ |9 s& \ i r9 e+ d8 . Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are all: k2 o& ? t w* W
the same road.
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9 . If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
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activated."9 {: n1 n2 p* O9 \
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10 . If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km
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accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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11 . For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur9 |6 S: o# j2 H; i P: v0 ?
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
# ]: H: B4 t$ f# C+ F3 }* ]blankets in the vehicle, as snow removal from the city streets is
. J: V( W a: a3 c6 T6 p3 k( evirtually non-existent until the spring thaw. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2007-10-11 19:09
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显身卡
发表于 2007-10-11 19:51
