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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1 V* D. v3 O& m2 n+ w- c1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. $ o4 e9 U3 m1 O! p. j: N& @
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
/ o4 \/ ~+ \0 H; _, ^9 l1 Z/ V3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. P' |) D* ~3 w2 m: B+ n
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
" a! |' o1 K* p! \- j5. Weed
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! z' W# p; Q, K$ O. u+ Q( W6 aTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
y+ g5 y3 k. G4 P2. Ottawa who?& f: W' y6 K& P% y& {/ m
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
0 P1 k4 k' ?( I2 i& ]; c, @7 e* x4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 2 D/ R3 S5 ?" P% `2 z
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. - p! u C4 _/ t0 k! X
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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# o* f) d3 u" i0 C! d: hTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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' A* _/ J* ?7 y1. You never run out of wheat.
7 o6 F- U/ T/ N3 F' ]2. Your province is really easy to draw.
1 C1 d: M4 G& i; N+ [3 a& F3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. 6 ?9 p$ G; Z# [) c% j3 v+ E/ f2 N
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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6 a9 D$ k! `+ S. f: u l' _$ fTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA . F. V* `6 s& Z
J5 }" K& E* | d( L4 Q1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
& |4 b1 k- q. I, q" R0 l0 k2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. & D2 _# O: G3 t4 h" X7 j* w
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. . J5 i; p- Q( ~
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. |4 t$ m4 b( ?" V
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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. L, E" \8 I7 |3 F/ f* V1. You live in the centre of the universe. ; ]! _4 e; E$ v2 |7 \3 X
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
+ p7 O( ], ~# x& ?- M3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. 9 o7 x0 v. {0 B2 s2 Q0 Y
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. ) F' A: w6 S, |; a. J( C
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, t2 _) |8 z* ~ P3 B9 b. `TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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# H% E: G3 M; I/ u1. Racism is socially acceptable
: ~- Q* ^. a! A3 z1 K( r7 n2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
( d3 w" H# d6 ?4 U' G1 w3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
# P3 M7 J A) o) M# o7 v4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *& g& H% I1 {* y0 g0 _ m$ L
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 8 c n1 q7 `4 b$ p: k* U) i7 x
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. 2 n: W, |6 \1 G# E7 C
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
, M2 m, r- x3 }) Z! q& [. o7 f% Q4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. 5 r" Z, y- }. Y0 c8 o
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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`. V+ Q7 q0 y, E2 O1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
7 j( ]$ q& t$ [% p& X/ k' Z. j: Z2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
, \! ]2 i7 p/ q; l* f- A& o U3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 0 E4 s( M3 l l; p5 B8 ^# e
0 V- X6 j" b, |( b- F, y; G0 `1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ; D6 n+ ^1 K3 }5 J ]; D, q
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
$ F$ r$ J* t1 j+ G6 q3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
1 T2 q" P% M% m% \' |4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." ! u& K4 @3 d9 V- M$ M- @
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. * u) S. B6 @+ h
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. ! O* h& V& S0 z; L. G1 Y+ O5 ~
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND " D$ a$ L* r1 M( x; d2 e
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. 5 Z0 Z) q8 W4 |1 z
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. + E/ @4 I& j; T- ?/ Y
3. The workday is about two hours long.
) F c3 U E; }" j3 ~4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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