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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA# j8 k$ ^4 U2 i
- X3 M0 z% `8 H: n1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
0 d) i# V$ X! p( g: S P2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. ' O# a( S; k3 P7 V
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. / a' Q0 A3 Y* ^. o+ @
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 6 d0 G3 L) r+ _- V
5. Weed 1 P1 r$ N9 l$ {/ y
1 G$ ^( L& ~! v0 G, O% _8 G3 Y: yTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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9 u1 D) P1 h& o" i N' |) s1. Big rock between you and B.C. ( j) Q' ?. b6 T4 \* O. I
2. Ottawa who?; b: |) T4 T. s5 @
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. 7 R+ y& M# g {, E' p1 w2 H; U
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
, g* V/ }' T, D" x( V" f+ G- K5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. $ h3 A9 a1 w- b- J1 S" M
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ! \7 n8 J' \- {% C+ \+ g0 i- Z
5 F2 R; A- X$ a1. You never run out of wheat. * M( D2 J4 n5 t$ `$ C: U7 J
2. Your province is really easy to draw. , i2 H! T$ I" ^: D6 s/ ~# i
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
, m1 F4 F, _0 g4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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1 l: S6 L b' A [. M N0 xTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. ' u i: j- i& K( I+ [. g8 U
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. , z5 a* X8 O# ~/ h7 P- `' I7 z/ b
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
+ I o n$ J/ R8 A2 q4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. : m+ s0 @: k; P( I7 F2 F
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
' ^, N& C6 q8 i" r2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. 3 i/ ]3 |9 l w# @6 x# Z
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
! _9 _0 o% Z2 O6 @, W' ~2 v4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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- A; S' {1 {' k- E$ N. `1. Racism is socially acceptable
$ C: ~/ `5 c% ], W. d c' z2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
0 ^* t7 P) H0 _8 X% T- v; ?3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
2 ?" C* x7 ~% v6 [, f+ A" F4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo * g2 s2 A: i1 h9 V( Y8 b
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK $ {9 ]2 U! {) S( @
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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5 C- z9 S( y. x* l& P3 r. s1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
* P4 X0 \0 }$ p% `, k2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
3 x S! l; c1 \+ R7 ~5 p& q3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
" h% x0 d2 S* B5 ?( o4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA 5 N8 x2 ~+ a! g4 |, ^
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+ Z- k* J4 i' Q6 x: y1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
6 A4 W; v( _5 W" e, T9 l3 p2 O0 N. X2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. : r$ R) |# T$ q& {+ S6 }# k0 |
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 9 Y' {- i! d; e5 W
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. " k6 w. ^, ^" F! ~4 \
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. & [. q4 [- L# g5 Z) D5 \
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
: O/ o k6 H, s! D3 d4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." ! z9 }8 ]9 l. v
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. ) r7 V7 m* L* ]+ c j8 e1 {5 k
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 4 Q( ]& {% d% _" u" f& Y [
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, x/ q) K- U, `" e! Z# Q6 ATOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
0 Y: {2 g, h- E2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. + i I$ b, F+ \
3. The workday is about two hours long. 2 ]2 a; m. u3 k6 Q2 \7 s" C% a' n+ v
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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