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本帖最后由 三思 于 2011-4-16 09:04 编辑 7 y( s* [. y( D8 D, j& I, U0 M
幼儿园还要再给他像你说的这样办一遍的,和家长弄是不矛盾的,美好记忆完全可以更多一点,没有必要限制,只要精力和财力允许,完全可以办生日会,生日会怎么算也算不着不好的风气
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% B' D5 C, E1 s: n7 Y( q* ^1 b娃是很知道party的special的, ...
) B+ {3 v- @( H" Jsweetlele 发表于 2011-4-15 22:43 
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8 E ?' x G0 R; M我认为大型生日会是不良风气,因为一部分有精力财力的家庭给没有精力财力的家庭造成了压力,父母因为担心孩子因此受到压力,而不得不举办同样形式的生日会。而这种形式并没有赋予生日会特别的意义。比如乐乐你设定的20元礼物符合标准,一个月9个生日,180元礼品预算,承受不起的家庭,是不是就没有能力让自己孩子参加朋友的生日会这样的社交活动?
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' w, N% T$ c- V) y4 Z: Y( i我家的财力精力大概不能和乐乐家比,但是我觉得给小孩子的生日大肆刷卡不是一件值得提倡的事情,有悖我的教育观念。9 X& C* g: Z/ y y( ~, {
# i) }+ A# V; G9 O! Q3 Y- M另外,我搜了一下,中外对小孩子生日会都有反对声音。这个网站特别好,http://birthdayswithoutpressure.org/专门讲生日会的,为什么当前的生日会是不良风气,有比我更多更好的解释和说明。其中也提到了乐乐你说的学校办一遍家长办一遍的问题,提到了孩子要赶很多生日会的问题。
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. @& W; x$ J6 v; a; V对孩子的不良影响也有非常详细的列举
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: j3 P5 z% O6 c8 v9 z! Q; FFor Kids: / h1 e9 K0 Q! Q u" O2 `, K
Not all children face each of these consequences, but enough children experience them to give us worry. 0 h$ N" |, p \" r( n
They get stressed out from parties that are too large and too orchestrated.
& z/ ?: m0 g: n1 O! A: e They are overindulged by too many presents. % ] r6 `; I) c& U
They feel entitled to what they want, not just what they need.
5 ^* z) y! h6 ^" g9 ~7 RThey feel envious of friends who get more—and someone will always get more.
4 B) j, k" G$ F( ?4 Q& j They feel disappointed, because enough is never enough. V5 m Y, {& ?' G' M
Long term, they develop materialistic values that equate personal celebrations with accumulating things.) [+ }* X3 n# l. a- `% W
# T. p: I& I8 l2 B9 ~& \3 bFor Parents:
3 I5 ?# X: R5 C* h* J9 `0 d8 v1 dSome parents say they are happy with birthday parties that drive other parents up the wall. But we have talked to many parents who report these consequences.
! d4 X* Q8 p9 A* \4 ^They feel pressured to “make” their child “happy” by meeting escalating community standards for parties.
6 r5 F5 }0 H% G4 rThey feel guilty if the party was below community standards that they don’t really agree with.
1 e6 _ K; i+ `* Z0 MThey feel overloaded with TOO MUCH STUFF, which they have to manage, organize, and clean up.
$ C' ]4 \7 x8 H: G; e) R/ CThey feel an energy drain from planning, shopping, preparing, and hosting the party.( p( V) q( X2 z
They feel regret or resentment afterwards when their child, or others, is not appreciative enough—“Why did I extend myself so much?”
) q6 u9 A l0 lThey run up debt from their own parties and from buying gifts for other parties., r5 b, @' W( ?+ ~4 d
They experience couple strife when parents do not agree on how big to make the party and how to carry it off.
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For the Community and Culture: - R# k) j+ ^3 [% t8 \% G
This issue is bigger than individual families. Personal decisions affect the wider world. Out of control birthday parties contribute to:
3 D/ s3 Z0 M" X/ ?! qA too much stuff culture
% J- h% O9 W# u# b0 zA me first culture# A8 W+ h* \; e2 k. J1 `
A trash and waste culture& ` f4 O i7 g7 [
An entitlement culture
, w! i/ S8 `+ P* B0 t8 hA envy culture
1 ^0 D' \: D, }" yA more of everything culture |
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