 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!9 ?. L$ ?1 J- x- R8 B
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.9 H6 p. E8 r" r" G& [/ S
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫& M% w& E' d$ _7 r
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
, Y a/ J: J8 Z9 b% Ldown.; m1 Z0 x$ G& O) o' b) l
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about + s8 ^9 f7 K, i$ B1 Y
you2 v) k2 `2 a5 E) c* Z" b+ w
leaving it down.
; r1 d1 B+ q. _" @# @3 G1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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- N# n2 G; V# r+ ?1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.3 q9 L) g# p0 v) Q
Let it be.
' H6 p+ G& G9 {; Z5 u8 M1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
' E0 ]! h$ ?0 V+ L3 ythat way.- `- [& y3 L5 M- r9 l9 o* g1 }
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.
5 k* N5 k5 d: A6 |4 ]1，哭泣是敲诈
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9 \6 ?8 @8 l9 n6 w0 A* Q3 w1. Ask for what you want." [( V0 m2 o! t Y
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
( p' S3 R' w" O+ yStrong hints do not work!$ U6 F& R3 }8 l7 H6 {8 |& B
Obvious hints do not work!
9 P- V) }1 z3 eJust say it!" J# d& ^$ \- F/ ]
1，你想要什么就说& j# Q7 ]/ `, L+ v
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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3 n- O0 Y+ \7 Z" l& m" O/ X2 S9 F1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
7 E' t; {* `% a( Q) i# F0 @: M- Mquestion.
1 N4 C. x& c& P8 h1 G1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）0 d- G5 H# J: a! x
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
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Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
) X# A. E4 I% `% y. F) `! d( c1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.' I ?- [4 C& T% n4 f
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
4 ~& y& @/ O `4 [9 C9 ~In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.# v, J' e' |2 U# P& p
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us, W* J) \8 Q! K/ N+ M. Q* p7 {
to act like soap opera guys.0 S$ q1 S% x+ N" t
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.$ I( K( n# }3 J3 A
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们3 L8 |2 h/ ]3 d8 e/ l7 S
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways6 h6 k8 F: n1 I9 d B
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.6 }- f5 B2 | o
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
/ N* |8 H8 R; V; R, @1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it r+ v* ^* T) s3 E2 f, H& ?6 W/ r
done. Not both./ u* l- I3 b: |+ h! V5 T7 `
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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& N% a4 V2 D" K: ~0 a1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during1 b+ _" A K' S, G* M2 [
commercials.: g8 E$ p3 p S4 W3 k, ]
* D7 t0 U1 b+ F5 K/ _1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.& Y- c, j# }* ` a# M
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.3 C& A% c2 ?# Y- t% |
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
/ ~: q- T+ C9 xWe have no idea what mauve is.7 C) j, }! N* s) J
( y- t" l$ u+ z4 L! d: x1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.9 b, k4 s" H8 ], F# z3 K, B& \
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
& J8 J2 N2 m2 l! Nnothing's wrong.9 y4 ~( O4 C, B' Q; x
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.4 H% Q7 W% J, T+ c% [3 _
8 }" ] c9 }0 N, }) s R4 m1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
6 R. Z3 Q; z6 u1 i7 I; Z9 N6 hyou don't want to hear.4 T; A R$ `6 J+ ~. Q: J4 ^; X( k: W" H
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is$ |- K, `1 t* X! \4 p
fine...Really., {( Q9 m' M, M4 g# `
4 x k" S0 e- V2 Q; d' b1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
% Q: P3 J: x$ h N9 ~2 R0 Fdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.. Q+ b! W4 C! x/ g( ~# C
% [/ ~' w$ y& J; O: }! _0 P1. You have enough clothes., \8 k% k6 C* b3 R
8 u7 A8 g+ u% ]( ^1 G6 g) \1. You have too many shoes.+ k' l6 y I/ \4 ]6 m- J0 S
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.$ `- e l% Y5 `' t- E
& }+ ?+ L H0 i6 zYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
( k$ ]8 Y1 y# k4 o0 n- EBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.2 l4 C, u& U' S) E6 [4 R
; W3 A5 A. }0 s/ Q) qPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.! |9 d; Y6 ~% q. ?
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
