 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
& q; c; Z$ x( ?+ f# @请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
" F7 I+ |# M2 B9 [1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫! J% a" c, x% T- C! V$ z+ y
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
7 x* Y8 f! H$ @0 v! B4 g7 {down.0 [; E' p1 A6 M; G8 n1 x4 ?. L
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 4 @2 P1 w' X8 ?: E" r* V8 J
you
8 E2 f9 W7 J. Eleaving it down.
: `0 Q6 Y1 _' V0 ?1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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( L- B/ t) B1 s+ o/ M1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.+ J. M- Y3 ]! E( h; c2 e6 B
Let it be.
) j1 R6 y! A7 k9 j, N0 C1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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, l l E) i3 W* |1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
6 B- {; G6 ~; [1 {that way., R, l6 Z0 [; }) c2 |
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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5 c4 _1 _& F8 Z! A( K$ F% |! w2 }1. Crying is blackmail.6 m/ ~4 e7 z& j8 q m5 f7 u# j$ n
1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.( l$ D" V" W3 Y. {
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
. L3 k& j6 g2 D+ w! h$ DStrong hints do not work!& @; ]" z4 s% }2 W9 ?3 [, l
Obvious hints do not work!
/ z1 C$ ?6 R q: J ]" z/ q. k3 l% NJust say it!3 [7 o+ E6 ^( a$ A
1，你想要什么就说* u: ?7 ]$ X+ j- H/ H7 a1 j
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1 G6 d+ Q8 L* _1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
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# c% |- O, ]2 ?4 G1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意） d, r$ T' ?* w- L/ A6 R
) o' E# V1 B: T8 B) x1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's+ D+ J1 J& ]5 Z" O+ I4 t. _
what we do.1 p# d+ S. v' F$ n/ }
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.% B7 D/ R) J1 M: J/ C% E& u2 b
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.! t! T; {1 y: S3 J
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument." d8 t4 G7 z+ K6 d) C
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
. C. u; w% c* D2 U, E8 c" B我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了3 Z" y" x8 Y+ l% L# h: M. C
: x+ O7 w* P8 O0 y4 u4 p$ N( U# z1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us; S V _% ?2 e1 c/ e
to act like soap opera guys.3 F( u1 b4 v$ w* }7 {+ ]- j
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
: N i t7 r" ]/ |6 ?+ t1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们; ~2 z k$ }# L- T/ u
9 }- i3 u& a8 m& @3 G- P/ }. Z5 {8 w5 u1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
+ B: c: D0 S4 \* cmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
- c& S8 }0 x6 n t1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。" d# @, w6 p, \% Y
9 ^ y9 z) o0 B1 a1 C（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
* d8 W% `2 ]+ b& ]( ~9 L1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it' X5 Q# i5 R- W7 w2 |* Z+ J
done. Not both.$ Q; V8 {8 j6 M
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.$ s J* f& w, [$ O& x8 f" E; Y
2 |+ `" T2 c; g& L; j, `1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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0 K# B3 b; l; E& T1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.+ K' t4 Q& [# W* I8 c3 [* Y) B. ?
) v0 R2 n1 U$ M9 b! W5 b# n! N u. F8 R1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings./ B, Z. X# u% V
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
9 ]) Z4 v1 ?$ h) q( t0 Q' {We have no idea what mauve is.: ^" n+ n+ g3 F/ b0 q
( g$ W B0 ` b6 h8 O8 H% U1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.- C+ ~0 p R+ _* z3 Z, M
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
4 Z7 K8 T. w+ |5 _0 J/ Z& i% m, n7 Lnothing's wrong.
|( y h, ?8 u6 ZWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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8 D/ f2 L* Z2 N1 e' E( J1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
% F, V" @2 y! T. Cyou don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
8 L0 o/ z" P4 M h+ }8 |0 c5 L$ ]& efine...Really.8 n: n, X! [! t% S! B
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
1 U2 M: h( d& G- Vdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.; o+ P5 `" t* p
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1. You have enough clothes.$ @: x5 n" A" }$ ~
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1. You have too many shoes.
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" j5 }8 ^9 G0 S$ Z0 ?1 H. d1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.& n% R. U1 X& z. X+ }4 F9 f
" _; ?% n4 Y4 ^+ e8 \( FYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
' Q0 K* H) B6 d, u- Q: P$ ZBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh., w8 E( u8 i1 \
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
