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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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, F6 T5 K# n- B+ c. Q, X1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.3 e* w: @# Z- r5 Z, d4 }
z7 W1 j* t& L9 Q( ?1 @2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
2 {7 @* X- |, b9 m: U4 O) A; Z( P! Thour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday5 h2 g, l. i% `& o
morning.+ R* [: n: d" J5 w* z+ B
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,/ M+ i N3 M! j8 r5 a8 R
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
2 l6 @/ {* {& c1 N0 Clanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.7 I9 }2 `- O/ \' V
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its/ ?8 C" G/ Z3 R
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest: ]* _" ]3 v: I% m3 I5 S
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
& T- r7 l1 U5 z3 Xgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell* p1 N9 w; X0 ?, B
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
# ]( ?, [( H/ t, @cussed out, and possibly shot.
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4 A/ x$ B# p4 s6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
! `* O& b" X2 I' c" cget you shot.. E% ?/ I5 y" W" ^
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
+ z- G$ C+ e) w0 k3 r, P6 A/ T9 Bhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at' U; |( e( {3 y% p3 i/ _" T( G
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot* m+ D7 `% m- B" ?
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first; G; p9 M& J C4 { r# ?9 A' s- Q
vehicle through the intersection.
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" P2 z; W& @" N2 |0 B8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
' | }, ~* a0 [! Pbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next. G/ z. C+ O8 ]+ E \( ^
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and' o/ Q& o2 `2 a$ M2 j. a
more construction starts everyday. ~: E) `0 k: M* i: ?) h& j: h
2 }# `" p9 N9 V6 I0 r6 |9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
: f, G- E/ S- U! ?, o8 L1 k/ Ideer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
+ c. M! w$ e7 s8 V4 w; A' v# lsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same( b% b# L, r+ g7 w( T" E
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
% C1 n4 W1 X, |+ P5 JRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and v5 m+ R& B2 n' S3 P* U% a; N, N3 d8 h
66 Street are also the same road; got it?2 A% M$ v: ?, [( E% i7 k
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the! q7 l+ @* U3 e @7 ^9 G( G
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally0 Q5 T5 Y4 ~4 Q2 M' p
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone," z! `& A! A' \3 |# P
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
2 y1 t4 J! B5 vaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.% g4 |+ o: N& O3 ~
+ T B5 I# S& t13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur5 ~: T- Z7 }6 d- k% @) a3 w w a
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
; [, @: t' h7 g tblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
