 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.4 [# s4 M. s. ^; J$ K0 [
- r7 ~ C1 }2 N& ^, W' |I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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: Z: h* j2 x% x! G9 d; }0 x2 Q( yI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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. }, B$ d5 j: ~, ~ G5 [$ UI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:; s0 P& N! l- m4 f2 t3 k
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?: G9 p, j# f/ h- T
& L" I& E7 }5 I1 Y" M" E7 K5 N"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?" z( c. Y. l( E0 _& q6 U
+ ^- y' A0 f+ }1 \+ h5 lI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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, o0 j; N5 g7 A$ qI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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' A& a- Y1 j' P4 @So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!; I; [" c# O1 {0 N- }
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.5 _) T$ ?4 g2 a4 e3 r9 H1 Q% e
( S) m) E: e6 W"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.1 Y- C8 C* j6 M* z1 B
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".9 j. [( M5 ?: M2 I- @5 a5 E8 |# f6 M
! l! m8 ^, C/ \ Q; B7 E# DRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.! m1 K8 k) p5 a
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
