 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.. }1 H* @- @1 ]. l
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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. A* R* p. L: y- ~- l9 _' II'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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& Y/ h' {# {7 }9 K" y"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"9 j# w1 @9 E$ n7 a
8 P6 W; }2 m: s$ U E/ Z# TI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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& ^' d5 k8 _4 z9 Q8 X( `And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?, p' J" |0 L9 u
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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) ~) |4 T: L2 R, pI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"1 r, \! _8 R0 C9 o3 O* [! f
- w! H+ d- w4 V5 b' W4 ^1 t5 MNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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! |8 Q+ V6 ?: p2 c0 N8 n9 {( i; KThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.( c( v5 H- c7 y* P
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Thank you very much!$ p$ C$ ]# v. Z" D2 I( K
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:" c, Q5 P) Z: Y$ z
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.% |! y4 M& c1 M% `- K
8 l0 O7 ], m1 u2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms., W4 Y5 P- W5 O3 w$ {/ b( A' ]
# H- b, s- S, K; y"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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" W4 _. t1 ]" o- i+ }; \Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".' K9 }* c% S4 q }+ y
* _8 w5 F& y! I7 J5 P0 @Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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& E2 l) N4 y$ e9 y* AThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
