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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.! E# n9 j! Q" j( [9 B
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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5 v( v/ l6 G4 Y' e# bI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:* b* V% L, H( w7 b$ N; L

: N. g0 B- @8 x4 }"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"" F# W7 c& `) z- o

7 X! F' }8 U  kI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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' r( K) w$ E6 ?, qI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?/ s; u; }/ R- Q7 w4 Z* K
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"* @% l9 u' m/ _- m

% b* w1 y1 |4 j" C( Q) X& b3 [2 tI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!9 o/ [- p* j" D

) d6 V& G2 L+ M, }I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."" C4 Q) F  z& {0 k- t+ M

, Q# K& R5 R; i+ w5 H- BSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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: Z) m( W, q1 H; A5 p0 i; FNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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8 S" J  a5 x4 f& ]' Y2 q1 ]This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.% D/ ~- F( h+ m( j- S

* Z0 s3 l1 J3 d7 gThank you very much!# o2 H; v" p, _6 [0 @% V
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) o3 j( N( A  m, y' N& gImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:7 h2 ~6 V4 t+ t6 N

# ]6 R  `; j' C% u7 a9 C6 f! O/ }1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.2 @+ p! S: w, l4 b5 T* ^) H

# T, x: j: G7 |2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.& V3 o' y1 |, E7 q4 ~3 q3 p9 u
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.# N: }5 h$ p6 x3 l* Z6 W/ I4 s
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".- Z3 c1 U8 k7 U. `" t) v% @' S
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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3 {8 y& {- {1 r, c; C7 S+ RThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
3 d. Y6 K1 E1 P; m) Q% _# }$ ja young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。; D- @- Z% g. }; {7 o! D
怎么理解?9 u. ^7 Q5 j& W; B# `: `2 L! P
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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) J# k- [  |! V  L) \! _; `5 {不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
- n( n7 Z/ B! B9 B怎么理解?
& T8 m' \" B- q1 ]' e50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
- h1 W: N2 ?0 |' \cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳 / H7 Z+ g: o# |
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我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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