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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol9 d1 V, m4 r! H' U
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' X8 K8 w6 K& F" G& R c4 m& oThings to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.4 J. h1 Z* G8 r/ z
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
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v. ^+ I5 m8 k" V7 R4 |2 H3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.) O' _ M+ d" v8 V9 |0 S
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4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.& O' | Z5 ^$ _6 X5 a1 r) R
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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9 ~& E! c( {' {& z8 h: K4 Q6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area% S. g6 G6 T6 ]' Y! M1 m8 p0 C
( {2 k% _' v# ^! W8 t8 y7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department. c* _8 N) S$ @
. o3 `' i8 Z$ ^3 h2 b8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
6 Y9 \ g2 I& c, s9 r'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'/ t" V# F6 _' W/ R) Y
0 }/ s& F* _2 p C, ]9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.) r* j9 _" }2 |! I
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.6 y- M9 w: j' z+ R$ @! B+ s
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.
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3 |& Q2 o. D2 W7 N13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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M9 E. i o! M9 ?; e) uAnd; last, but not least!)
8 y, k, Q7 R: d; ]: O15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
