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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
' _8 e& L5 t0 Z$ zlong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
4 o* b1 }/ O" A; a5 ^! i. Ythat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if4 \7 v9 K2 N* b
the newfie would like to play a fun game. . v  F8 U1 ~( S- C
  
, n$ _% k- s  B$ ]' l The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so& u6 q( d# k+ O7 ?+ Z1 x2 f4 |
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The7 b  J1 K0 L& U5 ~# y
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I
2 c% j* t# n" m; l3 e* yask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,
2 z& Z" A. S7 b2 i& n4 `4 Xyou pay me only $5.
$ d+ f: Q2 s6 Z; @
0 l% F% B, @% q' o4 X7 E% X% m You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I
) I7 v, c$ }+ t4 [$ C will pay you $500.
( a* M% I- T7 N ) F" M, N4 B# `4 G) `- R
This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
" Q$ s" m% n' D  {9 ^0 hthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
. T  k6 x: t' H1 f& T  g& |2 `
0 R! a4 e. b; K3 ~+ f7 k5 WThe lawyer asks the first question. 'What's
1 {, Q) v" f7 G/ B  v+ cthe distance from The Earth to the Moon?' # z* ]" ]! n4 r. ^3 m

: p' t: d/ r  x9 h; V' qThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his  N  \( a7 z5 C+ I6 w% `* j
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
9 ]" E5 f3 |" `/ `7 }1 r7 G1 O1 flawyer.
# v) i/ ~# W. q6 q% V- A, m" C
9 f3 a( U+ P5 O5 b& GNow, it's the newfie's turn.5 L3 V5 x1 y, h5 m; E$ E2 I! ]& e

! u; m: H# A" A2 p! [He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
& N6 i# l5 Q5 u. G2 p2 Lthree legs, and comes down with four?' " k& I& x7 ?0 {0 D0 P" G/ P6 u

4 S* a: b' i0 DThe lawyer uses his laptop and searches all
% ~8 Z) {5 F3 A7 U5 r7 areferences he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all* z, u9 N, f4 Y% I5 d, W% @
the smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
: X1 I1 c& K4 V- z* kof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
) D. @3 h8 Z* h  Y: d. `2 v+ e& khands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
. s# G& n' u( ], mback to sleep. / I7 w: y3 F, `# O1 O8 t
) B4 W0 j" f* U3 G
The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He& j/ |& f! B' O% y! q5 v1 d
wakes the newfie up and asks, ( a4 |4 T7 w# l5 Z# }5 S7 w- e5 D
. `3 f9 Z0 x# R
'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and0 B6 ]9 d' h+ a$ J  C
comes down with four?' 6 k8 A7 |. j, i4 Y; B. W# W

) y  D) q7 t( j+ Q0 c) ?The newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
; S0 e7 m; ~5 ^3 L' b0 Land goes back to sleep.# Y) @* P: ~; V! L6 L
+ n. W/ Z8 o/ l! m7 p- f8 X
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!+ C3 Y" z+ Z) Q1 d2 ~

& h, o* k; Y5 H0 o$ j1 ~Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
  J- R' D0 ^% ^9 G1 A: \0 w( {" {3 w# V7 v2 p8 T
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two
2 N( z+ m/ B" U% Q5 I8 _1 M( P>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason 2 m2 X' t6 \; j; w0 j* g4 _- J& l
>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the
0 r  y9 Z* {; f>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,
) P$ r. _4 b- O) J3 j! ~% G" Q) h" g>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
' d; s# U, [$ W, I" Y9 c
  ?( |' o2 m1 j) d$ \. Y+ w>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research
7 H1 t7 F1 m0 Y7 ^>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
% Z- f/ M  u4 }6 L9 |>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 9 L' b) y, q3 E- S/ e3 K
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
6 C8 c+ y8 q6 [% \>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
+ O# v. c4 o# ^/ w' e
1 V% v# ]! w' ]/ b5 A) ]>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's
- l( c0 o0 \9 O# v>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the
0 p* N8 |9 I. \. B  S>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
. V! Y( h* v  z3 V: {>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
2 ~( |5 a2 ^5 `# uA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a/ z! q  l, q" Q! q1 n; O
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb$ u' d& ]* W7 {6 a
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
( D: B. Q# |! t; S& o& Nthe newfie would l ...

8 i" _" J( A& o% M) M" L0 L9 C9 l6 I9 h. k9 m- o7 o3 p. ]4 k
- ]9 q5 o% Y1 X5 S
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:7 C% l7 ?7 P: X) ]
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
  L, D% n# l" X" b8 }好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
1 e) e4 i+ z+ _( I! Q; e加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
$ q7 z$ w. \( y) ?& e9 F7 o6 P4 L( y3 w
真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 : j1 Q' i+ J$ a) F0 E
* G" T  d6 W! V5 ~7 `, a. G' q

0 p5 G/ _4 s( ~! E  R" x0 o* m! O, R2 p* v, H/ @$ |
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
: g  Q) W$ }) j" G7 K; @) }“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
9 y/ s8 {5 M- S) I$ s0 f好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
3 V( C- u$ R# n& K' r8 O
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 / w& [6 ~- d  R1 G' n

; f$ k6 J' P' G2 r+ }% t  a2 R) W真聪明,偶像啊

) K7 k  L; P: L2 ?" ]9 H
; E) e# D6 D& q1 k: d7 s全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
& j1 `8 e5 E% o
8 m: K, K( j, e# i* A. l; E$ J: Z5 f3 y/ R: e1 M, f
全盘接受一下。

+ q5 ^. ^# @1 E4 C, F0 ~' T" r真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
) P8 v' f8 {2 \* Q! H5 ]
" d; N7 m1 u! P. A真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
) ~  F+ I$ s# Y% T! \
; L* U5 o2 L) R3 ?1 ?" q$ E7 e

/ o5 p; T( R* x" h, ^别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
+ Q% U0 X) D! ?' x& H9 _. L+ b) i
' ]$ ~7 c& P+ z6 R- [$ i: L2 u0 q( J5 |% F! l$ z
2 }4 g7 a* C  K5 X% c7 f
别把我往坏路上领啊。

- {/ o2 b# Q8 z4 }你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
- ~3 ]1 R! `' E1 P2 S加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

% J# X' R0 J1 U5 j多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 ; Q" u: }7 b  H

1 O6 h+ X: z7 e; V$ I真博学,偶像啊。
$ H$ o: E3 ?4 a6 R5 Q
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
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发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表 3 \( V" B$ X# R. J- e5 |2 ^6 V
5 q- {' {, v9 u) d: X# @- J
大学教授哦,能不剥削?
" H6 f& y  B% K( M/ b
她是大学教瘦?
1 Z- i) d  ]/ P' ~大学教胖还差不多   H' P4 M) D. J8 `
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
9 M8 c0 `& r- t6 D+ W紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

6 S, H; g  F' L& t3 O# M1 E说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
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 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ( a2 q8 d1 E. j/ |8 g
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
8 I! r# z) H" G! w+ `" _, I; Q
  }4 ^( Y/ l1 J
哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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