 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
2 N' q5 K0 n$ ?! k" o+ XOne day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.' M; f% S- f) Q4 T5 b: d# C) b
" E+ P% S4 n9 \, y+ F. G; u1 n. EThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.& s1 F2 t/ t$ m1 ^4 L
% B' I" A" d# ]8 G6 c# F4 s
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.# V/ d! _0 h" q2 v8 X5 ^4 j
; ?! v) \$ [5 A0 T) J9 }Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
0 }5 Z; q- b; L1 a- h8 s, B& Q. N( m5 {: G4 h
The blonde started laughing.
4 M' u" r# M' p4 v9 |/ O @/ i
/ k. p( g" d: C; f& G" l$ I. NThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
' t# [' X' A! ~# {' H) V* Z
2 e% s* Q' y/ N, g5 h# @This time the blonde laughed even harder.
; h& ], J) m, Z* `- c+ s/ F& @; g" _& X' O, A- d* `* u
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
. O) z2 V+ ~$ L) x( G4 k1 Z1 m) {% D9 b3 J7 C0 f8 y; F1 e1 h
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.. k9 k- E! M' ?( W# X9 C
; [% z* p7 d. m z8 D9 LThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"/ ~0 D% _1 A3 B9 {* U4 `: l+ x
- d) g2 G K, r1 Q+ _+ V! [Rowing Your Boat! B/ x, x N+ G& p; W( h: [
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.6 a: h+ a5 S( y* B
$ P/ s) R, s9 B" h! @* _3 R7 Q
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
& E' a T3 [; @+ @0 w9 {; ?1 E* y: F( ~3 D) {& g% L( i
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
: K# }- g0 A8 P2 E7 f, u- K, p. N) Y8 }; p8 ~
I Want to Buy That l; W; t2 Q8 l7 y/ E1 T0 Q
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.: ~: l' h8 h+ S# ^
3 K6 D: k# S1 _. N6 ]* }
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.# B7 W+ X1 o2 B1 x2 R
& J+ p* C" e) j; w1 i9 YThe next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.# `, a/ P# s% `3 _0 j% L
+ K+ A( |+ G6 c9 y( h: Q! UFrustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.$ f4 p5 L7 B0 P+ o3 d) x+ p$ K( m
/ }. r) Z0 O6 G) o
Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
8 ~4 l! k3 {- v F: F3 H0 o6 K5 T
- f( D d7 M6 i/ X: V6 VTo her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.- U( m+ q& |4 A& K! u
! g5 O) i$ {+ k9 U4 v9 l5 f- F* k
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"% h, ?/ H7 S7 j& b
6 O1 F4 x. p) Q: o* fThe clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
* |- b. ]; M; p/ g. Q" G8 C
- \' O# f: b5 sAre You Really Sure?0 o/ U7 y2 I& I
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
' B4 _' } D% v) {! a' T1 D8 C# [: ?8 K
& v! w; Y# v% @, O( BIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."$ H/ ?* c7 Z$ @/ T/ r0 O% O
3 f1 e% Q" H2 D2 B
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"1 [* X/ a9 T/ p9 m' ^$ O- {, I
% N f9 ~* v' {, O: t9 |. e
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
$ S) W! }! G8 _3 R" T
}% s+ ?4 [" M% ~+ pBlonde Sky Divers* r' L9 `: Q8 c; Z
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.4 Q: G4 j/ ]7 t) O/ k+ g
# c& J4 z- O( t! ^7 p
The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
' v* S, e' R z t& D C) W4 h! T6 |) G1 Y
She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
3 `5 V5 s) K# n. L
2 r! v& m! X/ c" b$ bThe blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"' X! L' S J3 W; w! x
; i. D" j' c b& X[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|