Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:

" E; a8 d* W. s: d) M% M3 q1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

% @& A( U/ v+ k8 e0 Z# g! M$ _2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

) I, e: Z3 z) T9 G" T$ L5 B3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
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4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

- v# s. u# [: t" e5. Are You Andy or Barney?
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6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

) F( k* _; P. F" q7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

9 m; A9 T+ W8 r( K& w8. I pay your salary!
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9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
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" k4 @& q2 i1 o- S, O. ^10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

1 M/ n, c  m2 n3 W  f) }9 t11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
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12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"