 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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: d' O; A+ q2 q: |, W4 X1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
' B# r* n2 \2 r7 [& [2 \2. Mostly to clean the house. # x! J5 V' [% T4 J
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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* J2 [" q L/ aHow did God make mothers?
& A$ D. z1 `' N, ~9 q1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.) s, Y8 I# w. u$ o* h
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
% [" x+ ~. ?+ X3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. , j+ { o# W( |" R2 }
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
/ E. a& s2 x, `% s; R' g* @) G1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
3 j0 g# N+ V) o J% w6 b2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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, {# W, m' h8 q6 n: q4 PWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
5 M o" B9 D& x1. We're related.
' n& G) e) ]* ~3 G q8 [3 K2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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& @' I6 T& h! P) Z A9 K6 e7 qWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
( N; m2 \+ U+ b9 K1 p1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. ( f$ E& y2 {% N( J$ p
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3 `) o$ a" M4 S3 y v8 p: h6 M( |3. They say she used to be nice. ( n6 g& a- r3 k, r2 W/ |, Z
/ ?6 R1 B# _1 K. N MWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
5 i2 k3 ~9 G6 w5 y0 L: m1. His last name.9 z6 O( R' L' A$ g
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?3 l7 c# I$ \& l3 Q4 T& J5 w X
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad? 0 q& W! {% N. _6 V1 w# }
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
9 D$ v; f! q$ X0 |' B( p- c2. She got too old to do anything else with him. % o4 Y" r# h- o, z; v. p6 M
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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# {" |5 H" Y/ `- m5 nWho's the boss at your house? 4 a1 N0 ~7 F5 j$ [8 @: q* K
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
6 m/ J I1 Y5 D" S" ^2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
7 j' w. X$ A6 |3 `$ G3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. & U3 l7 q) W F0 g7 n
, u4 I9 K9 y# O' f" D, i9 KWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
6 ^* r# X4 q& O1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
: I, V1 E/ y# ^% M1 {5 F8 [. ]2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
% n( U% E" P% v+ T- h. y3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. u6 h5 i+ \ I2 H* E. u5 b0 V
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. * i6 o6 g$ L% Q" b
3 k6 q$ J3 S' tWhat does your mom do in her spare time? 9 n% j0 r: I: ?1 ]. [" d! r8 F
1. Mothers don't do spare time.* X' L5 B1 R5 L/ `9 i7 t( L
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. z! t- Q% q7 K/ @' c0 Z! m/ ]
* r* X% ~/ S; Q; b- O* X. r+ b" f+ [What would it take to make your mom perfect? ) U1 J! b# a+ f- h& v1 ^
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
( T3 I$ C$ }) s2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
) u9 t! T* ], C) P1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 0 Q/ `- k( ^8 o- G* v
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
- o9 z1 [: V: r+ Q) V2 O6 C3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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