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, b" g- ^/ e7 jWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
- I9 c" W0 ^, k$ {2. Mostly to clean the house. # T6 [3 {+ J" v+ O& I9 t5 _6 ^- {* Q
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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How did God make mothers?
& t; `# y1 Q% C; |1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
% O& m3 _3 p6 z1 m% m9 v' ]2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
* M* z6 b5 C% @* C3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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: A& M) Y4 _+ K0 `) UWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? & m5 y4 Y# W2 F, p( d
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
- z1 m1 U: I- ^2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. ) s$ [* n! c; R0 s0 L
$ M' C4 C7 L+ Z/ v0 l3 zWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ; |# q) z! C8 j; S+ a: A& E [+ C
1. We're related.5 d+ W- k$ | H1 |6 ?% x, j
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. ; b' z3 i- H) \6 ?8 c1 y
, M; T) y- U) Z# OWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
, ?+ D1 t/ Z, `0 {2 w0 M1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
% Q: ]; n) j n2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
5 t3 z: e" K' C3. They say she used to be nice. & ^8 h( m* b( a, R
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? 9 h5 _( v/ d- P& q
1. His last name.
- `* ?1 O J. L: }* F. @" ]) o- c2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
* N1 L& q; I C3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
! d D4 `) n, k/ T+ C9 m- a1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 1 {/ R- C% z/ u' K5 u* Q
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
, b0 ?" s; {! o! K+ f& T3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 8 |+ D2 b7 v: q' k4 G/ p
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Who's the boss at your house? % C6 I* N. b* ?$ F
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
) S' z) L5 d- ~2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
1 F" R1 U, Z0 d+ T3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. 7 q" d+ Q' [" T1 S& ?* \
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What's the difference between moms & dads? , T& R; d' J- S" d5 x6 [, ]
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
L1 x) }+ G" ^ f2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them. i6 C3 P2 M- Z( q. D
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
2 j3 C# O5 o) q% _4 y. z* h! N4 G8 l4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 7 z* C$ [, Z! R$ M2 j- w4 ]
) {& {' _( L& x' G) YWhat does your mom do in her spare time? 7 ? \8 R3 h3 r5 P- W& g4 K8 h. l
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
n+ E0 m* J+ F. T& K8 L2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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q7 b4 Q5 Y: L+ B( Q mWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
. n: g5 j5 J9 Y$ g* T5 V! q1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.; c% D% q2 ^. A: t3 U! O# A3 \
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 2 A; `' P' r5 W4 I' G. W7 Z& I6 z
1 {6 d4 C) @9 H% K3 q7 IIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? ! E, a8 z9 ?; i& o8 p
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
3 U6 K: Q V$ A0 L1 K/ U+ s4 Y2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.) B1 c: \: k4 Q5 K
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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