 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?8 i6 C' L ~2 z4 P+ D
* G1 x% B" [) r! v- w3 ?/ n1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
) \! _; w# p8 z1 y' D2. Mostly to clean the house. 4 Q- Y+ z" ]* x9 g" K) w
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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8 [. X& C+ x1 D' c- v% W# f: DHow did God make mothers? & ]! a) x5 d: C" V9 e
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us., a; Z7 G4 \6 Z0 m3 s
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 0 C4 s5 B, x+ _3 \+ D5 |! [+ F
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. & p- f$ p' p8 Y$ l K0 I
/ r- _9 _0 |; p) k0 h( BWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? ; m3 E' A( w0 Y% P. o+ x4 A7 W
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
7 a$ x) u" c8 I! V; D; S% F% W2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. . R! ]6 _& l/ w
s- Y( R4 R$ L: F8 _* [Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
2 r5 ?8 `3 ?- R1. We're related.
" M9 [% q8 C& r" k2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom? / w6 @& I" n' H( N( \4 ?" E0 ]+ E
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. ! p! H& Z1 Z! G6 o7 q0 n& y+ u5 _
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. & a* `$ [ \9 \( E
3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? 6 q b8 j, [" L% k: Z ~. `) }( z* B
1. His last name.
+ P, S" }$ W7 ]1 m/ S2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?: x* Z6 u* ~$ e
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 0 h$ R+ m' q5 k8 l& v9 _" \
# k0 f8 M3 a) y+ H0 u3 u6 JWhy did your mom marry your dad?
! Z5 X3 E2 r7 j1 d0 J: v% g8 u1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
5 }8 M2 [. t' F4 H) E9 e2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
. p0 _. t# W8 |+ W3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 1 o1 F. O6 D. ]8 S* t" Y( J
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Who's the boss at your house?
/ p+ ^# b( {1 y" \/ F1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. - w# E+ |& @ I- y, m, {
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
# k9 z+ d# I( U8 S& I3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. - N- q' v$ `9 N: I2 a9 N3 f1 t1 B
# M) S8 q& M) r& AWhat's the difference between moms & dads? # B* a. f/ S7 K2 }4 L
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. & S7 w+ L" Q& I( `8 l
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.$ N( Z9 d# E! l* x5 I6 X2 ~6 u4 ~
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. ( Q' E9 e+ R2 K) y7 Q2 e
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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* ~. O3 _5 [. Q* mWhat does your mom do in her spare time? , h% ?1 `) y! M) v7 }, H
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2 _) @7 }( h; u8 z, B4 {1 O2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? " J. M V4 R% _: Z. W' x* x7 e* M' U/ {+ F
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
0 x7 n0 u$ ~: @7 G2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 4 q% g. F/ i: a6 T6 W% X$ |: q
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
. U0 Q4 a1 ?6 }; E; }1 \1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
1 t! D5 a( ^) B2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.: }" V: r$ ]4 H5 X+ h: p* b u; Z
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. ) A( O7 H3 f& f+ v
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