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Why did God make mothers?9 A" N- p% g" P$ J! }- s3 e
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.0 `& c# {" `0 B7 _5 e3 n; @
2. Mostly to clean the house. ! Y6 J* s$ ^' |- d9 F& _
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ! v* c$ a- h1 g: E+ r" G7 k* W
* I/ a6 H: ]. }2 j- `7 pHow did God make mothers?
7 M, k3 S3 M2 r7 ^" }1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
, ]0 Y) W0 ?, g8 p7 U2 A6 e2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
' P/ i& N/ N% Y3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. # T1 ~% H9 Z% z/ N( Q+ U) m8 ]# k
+ T; W) O) B5 y* M% OWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? ! X3 P+ m9 K6 M4 I% a) A& G& y
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. + e8 G. ]4 F3 ?: T) `0 \
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. ) e" q2 n6 i# N6 Z
7 e/ T$ t( C' |Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 5 f! C d2 g$ J. }
1. We're related.. i1 I) J- U0 t. H" c
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
# @3 Y2 I0 k2 ~, E0 r1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. ' U4 ~( {0 p8 m# j) a
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 7 B4 l. N3 S& s* L' D4 r5 S5 F3 \
3. They say she used to be nice. 2 P! z( X& c( {
! {+ N( j9 F5 [* h, Q* T, L: z* x3 zWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him? ) Z7 a/ V) ~9 J
1. His last name.: d0 J0 v! E8 S5 c: @+ D8 g Q
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?+ j/ t$ T5 [3 E/ ~7 i8 D
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad? " V$ v0 v8 K5 {( Y3 F3 L" A
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. " n+ n* j4 B3 m; X% @
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
* G4 O8 u9 O+ u3 c+ d9 G3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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! ]8 `" a" }4 u w% D! y/ {" ?Who's the boss at your house?
0 U6 c) ?" ~0 n ?4 S0 }! l$ _1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
: Q. j3 R: N5 r+ a2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.$ X% T6 ~5 u+ M* p% R
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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$ @6 ]/ ?0 g" ?- K, PWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
k3 o* C: | w: Z1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
& b$ @5 \+ h. r2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
2 B7 N' e5 [4 r3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. . F9 ~/ d2 O! w
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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( u$ B9 T1 o" O+ u* _What does your mom do in her spare time? 4 @' p5 G1 S" g& k; b; F( ^
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
$ g; W v# H3 X) J7 k% }4 N2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? / m$ ?. {( L5 w
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.! w; z1 x) M- `
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 5 ]2 \; S- r Z6 @; c' {$ W4 Y. P
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
y) R* c, c A" {" D7 q/ D1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
8 I' f7 B ?: g4 C$ A `: G2 ^2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.6 z) S9 T6 n. @0 l3 O' Y% _
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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