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" d( H5 [% ]6 V+ y1 CWhy did God make mothers?7 C" m* w0 @% g U5 H' m2 U
4 V) b8 j2 ]( {* I1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
1 p7 G N. a1 S2. Mostly to clean the house.
( C" G. U# J4 J" h B& w# G3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. . o3 q) I0 o. c- C6 [
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How did God make mothers? . {- I( G2 y7 A( Z& E
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.8 @. i# a7 J# F, o) N, B
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. ?4 \* @) t& a: p$ Q2 o/ A
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. : l( g0 U% _% A
* w3 k; |+ \$ @7 S7 `1 \5 j1 X; H2 fWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? ! E% d% S4 i5 w; U
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. " X+ F* \9 Y7 w9 Q* a0 p( C+ m5 p
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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2 r- H& v6 Q9 K) XWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? / b- V( w1 v' x
1. We're related.5 H0 D# C* j, P/ |
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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" s: P% P7 I1 f" {& v9 m: WWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
( e* h8 ` F* `* v' w- F1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
3 J5 q; P @3 E3 h& r2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
: F' G8 L0 i+ U* d3 @" W% J3. They say she used to be nice. 1 \6 j" w1 z6 A' Y# _
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
' J5 E; V$ E! [& } ^% V* E( g1. His last name./ ~7 o+ @* `( \! ~
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?) Y w+ W$ c" o4 u* ~) Z' |
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
* t0 h/ G5 J" ?" z- z) x! z6 W1 l1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. ) ?; H2 p2 z- ~" t
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
# d8 w* N3 P; D3 A! P7 t3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house?
4 F& Q9 ]+ o- L1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
. P! K( I9 H& t2 o' V) ?8 K2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
* i4 W5 {- m$ g. u' _) _( v) l3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ! w" Z5 n. r- \. g. W
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What's the difference between moms & dads? 5 H+ L+ K9 E" ~& E
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
; j# u7 W, O _& @) z2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
& p I, f1 _) u' B+ a, P# @3 _. u3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. ( r# U2 o& D0 H9 J4 |
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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7 J! [3 q6 p7 s+ W- F6 ~" TWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
: V) a' M X4 s" e( M w2 r1 m& z1. Mothers don't do spare time.
1 N+ F/ Q, Y! s: ^; [& Y2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 6 t3 t) K3 P1 L) h2 } o5 E: |
) x( a% X; y8 s. WWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
& B4 C- C/ f8 M+ N1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2 q% z( ?( R7 h/ h5 W4 _2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. + G5 k, c8 e2 `9 f6 K# B; ^, O5 B
0 D* h0 E% N l9 YIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? ; y3 F0 u5 O8 k x
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. . c' g8 O9 A( b2 k% f) f
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
' b% ^% ?0 |9 [4 z3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. * b" F! c% k, T1 Z% M! o
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