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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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4 v1 k0 u6 p( e2 ]0 L! _* `" B9 [2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
: l4 b% p/ o$ C% E+ D5 B: uhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday2 |" {+ `0 o0 |4 d
morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
9 `5 y- i7 X% A- \9 dyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
3 M" U2 n$ ~( ~. i: Zlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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- F& q: J' ]' X, f4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
- h# n6 a8 C. g1 Zown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
) i9 w3 L8 q0 Emuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
" f7 c8 C5 a9 H' f$ a/ S7 igo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
* u2 u) a& {2 M/ p$ T% G0 G Pphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.6 k# m& n+ g; r. o" e3 V
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
4 t( }6 P# t# R I& H4 T9 |cussed out, and possibly shot. Q3 U8 C$ ` g# J. x3 G/ D+ H$ l! T
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
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; ^4 }1 j5 f- K3 m S0 v7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that$ \# S6 X$ K6 o
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at4 X9 k2 w& o: C1 T
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
! u( U: V. Q9 l, d' b/ p6 oyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first# N9 W" [9 ~3 F% A6 d
vehicle through the intersection.- m$ E3 e+ p1 a, r7 T
# ~" ]/ D2 J( v5 I8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour. s( }' C+ A, g5 o: I8 F e, K% ~
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next U. i" e, u% C, q0 N/ \8 z
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
# ?$ c- S; B5 J% s( v- F9 E0 S; nmore construction starts everyday.6 z0 ?( j; G* C- U
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
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squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same3 |. b; ]4 ?/ t, u, u6 X1 L
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
& d6 P$ \$ e8 M/ G3 A& T5 j/ uRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
9 U ]) M, C& e; z5 U! a4 K66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the3 r/ Y5 r2 V6 M' P& `$ K. n1 p
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
1 C9 _0 a: `. S J3 A# ^0 X/ Yyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'3 h3 b4 X" m& r
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot., I: R* r5 k- h% X x% S9 L/ r: B
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur/ d+ C3 X* n6 ^- T! ^
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
