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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:* s3 i7 W+ {9 Z6 k+ J" g* v
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.5 |1 b Z0 f" c9 o- A
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush7 A- Z; u+ e# z s' G3 P s
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday' H( d& z( |- v
morning.& o5 Y/ y; Y8 ?8 G
& I: d. @7 M5 }& W- A3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
/ D' d9 y& A' B* X0 N4 N2 ^you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a4 g$ T/ {9 V( Q
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.( e/ I' [5 J$ o4 X- L
0 g. ^5 H2 k% s6 n& E, q. G4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its' }8 m$ Z0 P, b; N& S0 J
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest m& U9 c% W: y
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires ]5 ~1 |- T- Q: ?% |/ n
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell7 {! p' N0 q4 g0 j
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
5 z0 m* r# P; I. ]( f2 Dcussed out, and possibly shot.% e# H& R2 l& U) ?! Y
' a3 u% Z1 e4 t: j4 H! D6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
$ ?0 {7 q+ z; i7 [get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
$ }$ F% g3 e$ L# I1 H% u i& Yhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at: ^3 Y; ]0 i! {$ W6 Y; e% X6 _
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot- X% U) o- e8 n0 {! _+ j: R1 k
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
5 u. i; [* Q" @7 L0 U) P. Wvehicle through the intersection. o3 I0 ^) b0 O
' y1 j; B( i4 ?8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
T3 ?/ {4 N! k& Jbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next( ]0 `' I4 h" x: ]8 H9 h/ c
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and( c8 c6 ] W; R
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
) ]( J7 d3 l3 O$ I# @9 d' @4 v& D! pdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,8 R& \5 q. w: r
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.7 q" g7 P4 U3 ?- F4 S
" ^) ?( n# y0 K) x. u2 [10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same6 ^( W/ x0 b3 @
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
U1 f3 J8 V5 n5 d8 rRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and/ O0 m5 W/ M- S- d5 ?" {
66 Street are also the same road; got it? M( ~: \. y! `0 ~/ X
+ j$ Y8 z9 {- ~3 ~11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
5 N6 e# n5 ~: O# s- G4 S6 ?- p& Yshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
Y/ B8 F u+ W* P$ EActivated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,: @/ l t( d, w9 c6 C# H
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'0 J* g/ C) w% q, z
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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- q7 x3 R, G& S, P13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
, ~& C" i: W& g' v. {lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and: B9 @- P/ I) ?# @
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
