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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.1 T% B# E- d" ^1 K; K

" K" B& v  M8 G8 W; G. I. bI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?* J4 K% q; r) c  A2 B

- A$ ~# ^1 T0 r% pAnd the second one was:
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, N  J/ t# N% H- r  o9 l"What's the 2nd Amendment?"/ a* p" M  \/ ?
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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+ ~0 D- i8 q$ c8 e0 T. P" \- l: ]"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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4 P& _- }; D" V- n# L1 tI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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* Y+ F* u& j  r- b4 BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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% Y8 x- O/ ?0 l  G. M! `So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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: O7 q! @2 v( h5 I3 V, s. ~Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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1 Q- G+ i4 h3 w7 ^1 wThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!6 \7 o6 U" E+ I

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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:  X5 P8 r1 X' O5 E6 x5 A" o

& Q5 U" g6 K( z7 e5 y1 s1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.2 }3 U) S3 g3 s

: l3 e! S+ W' u3 z( t2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.0 G; K2 G' Z% O; ?

6 M8 Q& U4 j: V; _( J+ \"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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' h# D6 W2 p- T1 W4 \* SJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".5 W+ a( e3 v. d6 b/ y* _: |

, u( K4 f' q7 t$ KRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.! H, ^+ @7 d5 H/ ^% k

: x  V! i0 T1 p# @The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: , i- Q6 P) g& Q5 t5 l
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
; A; t2 F) W9 `1 {  x/ ^4 N. \怎么理解?
1 ^. g( H/ y: Q1 q) Q50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
6 h5 w- d7 z: h8 F; L怎么理解?& m9 G" Y: I/ e2 E
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
( a0 v! s# i; K$ @' U! [- ~% wcyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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6 E: g$ V3 A! h/ t8 c, _我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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! G5 I& h9 j9 Z5 T( _2 Q我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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