 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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8 e# ?0 m7 J& k6 W, L6 BI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.0 V8 i0 ?2 U3 f
: L( u( l, w7 T: w# a$ ^, ^) VI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.7 e z7 B" K a/ b
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:* y/ I2 t m7 m* o+ e* T
! \' o8 J" r" u; |/ |, P"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"% H/ [5 U* L8 K9 c; F4 h Z# V
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:( Z. l3 W, P: X$ D. b: a1 `* y& }
2 o+ L9 N+ A7 _. h7 i7 \"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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6 Q) l. ~6 M: |; i5 ~6 I4 rI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?: |0 P1 v S2 R1 Y. o* G& s
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!2 o0 e5 }$ A; i6 z5 [; v8 N+ `8 \
- i$ l+ F7 a% C0 G C+ I& y- |I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"5 c" F4 a8 ~2 I, P% M7 w5 Y. O% ~5 _
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”6 T1 P' l8 `+ P( o1 Q
/ w9 {$ @, s. [+ c0 lThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.; W% t* [& J0 r
( A) e* L8 P7 WThank you very much!- B( f: @6 K- W1 d$ K- p
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:4 S7 i) ?/ g$ Z8 A
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.* K3 v% \/ t$ G( b0 D
% G& k, ]0 S# Z2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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% Y- I+ \! f! T( [! ]2 ~; D"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.; a4 ]! H, M0 N" F. F) r7 b& k! J- r
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
