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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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" y2 o/ \% E1 |. d  J* ?6 `5 c, XI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.* @9 Q, w1 ~$ ]5 }+ ~! l" s. `
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"7 B6 [  J+ J: C( ~# }+ j

! |. i" j" C' e6 U0 L% TI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?9 M& n7 U3 m7 K7 [1 n8 [& y3 r
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And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". Z. O2 D, `& I. _. Z) ?- Y9 Y

5 k4 n" j: L1 ]8 w! WI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?' }- K+ N" I2 f/ I1 A4 z

& m, p5 g7 g6 l% |3 g2 e& p- ?"What is Roe vs. Wade?"% c5 ]0 K8 }# u) @$ y- k) ^7 L

/ K7 [, I) Q( z  WI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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- D& n# t6 N1 B: B* s; XI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."/ Z: O. A  u( U2 J9 z
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"0 z; v" `' X9 N1 L8 d
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”5 j9 ?' U0 j% m3 P

7 G0 `( z( L) EThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.+ q9 R; c2 o8 G

( @# h, i1 o3 s. MThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.4 h, J2 N8 h" {) j4 I6 \& X

& d* |3 N. w. |/ R% ?+ Y2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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9 ]4 W5 ^: O$ b2 N"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".3 G2 A/ X5 W3 J9 \  m) S0 {! O

6 D. y  I7 m( R9 W: s& r+ W7 A& ?Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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! U0 V  b- `  SThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: 4 s, n- Y/ _2 J& w3 f/ j, s+ m
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
大型搬家
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。7 X. c% P( z4 V( E
怎么理解?. `+ c" D9 M: ?" I, s5 I
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
6# cyz0116 4 [  z9 z1 Q, m+ K
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; z# D/ a6 G! B; a& f, F7 u1 X4 U  f不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
3 b& p  q6 k7 C. W$ U怎么理解?
4 f% h1 W' R5 A' L50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?. e3 z9 D0 ], i& s' o8 W5 Y; N* N
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12
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1 z  }2 b% K: ]. r5 V" L我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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  u+ W: S% X) @) W我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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