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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
/ p) w5 l w3 `0 `, R' uEnglish is a stupid language.
9 ~% E) f" j& n' n" A9 R( AThere is no egg in the eggplant, z8 K4 ^, K9 v, G: V
No ham in the hamburger& K9 n0 T8 r* y3 h) P! A1 j" `
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
7 l( O: M; e+ U$ b% V& t EEnglish muffins were not invented in England/ K7 H( x, b- x/ R& O+ O7 ]# G3 r
French fries were not invented in France.* L5 h* {/ ~' G# E! m w
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We sometimes take English for granted) e; v: s- N3 b0 o$ f
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
8 b% N3 D( p% c7 r& qQuicksand takes you down slowly
( T7 M( \6 n3 s1 U. MBoxing rings are square
* S, U0 x7 Z9 w u$ C! GAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. # o p; ^7 {* e* ?+ f2 ?
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
! t9 t [% G' |If the plural of tooth is teeth
1 x; o0 g$ z m+ q1 V8 MShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth+ T7 h: O2 e2 m0 u
If the teacher taught,$ F5 @( ~* u- a. ]/ q4 J9 |- U
Why didn't the preacher praught.+ ]4 N: b! c0 L$ `5 f" k% }. z
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
+ I# l; I8 E0 X7 W9 {( k3 T* mWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
' N3 w5 L8 u/ A9 `/ GWhy do people recite at a play
) `# B4 k( k& p N5 v+ WYet play at a recital?! m6 S' j3 R1 p, x
Park on driveways and$ @+ ]+ A+ t/ f9 U
Drive on parkways
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5 {& ^# F; A! \3 |You have to marvel at the unique lunacy6 O) m: p! P8 \
Of a language where a house can burn up as! R4 j( Y# m; L" ^+ U
It burns down
' Z4 _; w) F4 T: M0 r/ {' jAnd in which you fill in a form
" T! J3 C( |9 u! b7 J9 MBy filling it out
( G" L( k- S" A; q2 M$ v. L6 RAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!) V4 V, u/ |" H
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English was invented by people, not computers3 l* m1 c [4 H$ M9 d1 d
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
, m% ?$ h1 a0 R U! U' Z(Which of course isn't a race at all)- M) A: A3 b* W5 m4 n& ^/ ?$ u
3 E: q# m5 O6 qThat is why
" U! U O/ w, ~( ^! }6 BWhen the stars are out they are visible
8 H! x: {6 z8 q- fBut when the lights are out they are invisible% y! t, b3 e6 w( B! H5 | i2 ?
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
" g) \: w2 W7 F5 s- ]It starts
5 x1 R9 J6 _4 A: jBut when I wind up this observation,
6 i5 M0 i* W: V" yIt ends. |
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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