 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
7 x4 Y# Q5 E8 v" y, m7 U: \% _: e" \7 Y0 h& O5 E/ g
6 Z8 T: ^! B" \
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------1 N" \% V% Q+ N' r9 J5 W0 h2 f4 A1 v
r# T: ?, e7 e- h" L6 \
- h; ?8 w3 a/ {" j
( R5 C7 d; Y( f* T- K. y, d/ eTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2 d6 z( a& W2 g$ L3 Y0 g3 U/ D5 R$ V/ z9 w% E
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ' |' k% H: j7 ~* Z, v2 n( r
( V6 r$ X* _$ E# VIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
: `7 g8 f9 X) T2 `$ Q' D' Q
4 P; I2 L1 L. H0 LLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- b6 K0 o7 `# b. i# P$ L! J
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.- q9 x4 q$ F4 D& U4 U& ~ v
0 n& m' e2 ~/ V1 N/ z3 QGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
" y) y! D' z! t/ D- F! J# E$ i# j
}5 r! z( F7 h8 r! [Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. + ?+ T- r7 U" g) }) j3 \, B
& U; v# X! B6 s+ C
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean., N& x4 z. |$ u1 e6 y) Y
9 z% e: X: S2 D% x
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced... c0 q2 m- s# g2 ~' P0 f5 O1 O
! a: u2 D5 \& ?1 V8 e
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. & O( j- g/ S( L7 _& a: h) A
g! Z; @0 C5 f
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 8 A, U1 x/ B" Q
. @0 W# s6 c, zRinse conditioner off hair.
& T: V( i' I( G# G6 w( o! {- w8 ]
/ h8 e2 q* s$ L- KShave armpits and legs.4 Q4 C' R1 u0 {& j. D4 |
0 J& D* Z. }4 X* I
Turn off shower.
, q, {7 |- B* H" g+ R" Y; e+ ]% o: T" }) s7 a$ _, R
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
# O# J G. U, j; f0 h% A/ n& i7 f& ~6 p
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
5 Q/ ], f( T* q% |& m; }( R
) i$ N# X W$ \! u: B' O4 DGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
4 ^0 B( ?$ {- ]! t- {/ T8 Z4 F0 d6 @! `0 N; p+ q8 c
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
* {$ Y6 v; ~ N6 X' g
) X/ d2 c+ @9 V- l8 ^5 n) ~Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
y- V7 @+ o" q/ r8 _: e4 ]9 }# W+ M2 T( R
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
- X1 Y& }9 p5 k3 V% L# G
$ |8 g% K: |! t! v4 g) q1 _# b
) j2 Z+ X# R" ^HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 4 |+ i1 {. S3 e2 {7 s0 f Y3 M9 A' q
& H R$ ~6 a: |4 R% b XTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ! h* \( L0 l5 B- w) @, D" @
' M& i! T" T7 @
Walk naked to the bathroom. V: w1 {; Y* r
9 V& c2 p; V- P' r' v6 g/ `
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
9 I* W' C% [4 z6 H
7 m2 F3 P! Z9 n' M' ULook at your manly physique in the mirror.
# S' ^# T) e @* F' m% G; d! {) |
9 z9 K2 O# n1 `Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 5 x; h. C) G2 ~) t4 j1 O
+ Y6 n3 `. v' B* x( T; N, ZGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 1 ?$ H) ]& y# c
' O% M2 ], x& `/ D9 s* ]
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
9 [* B! A0 _! x2 }; |* w8 |+ Z8 L
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. % B- T6 x3 Z1 z6 \: `- E
5 G9 K9 x$ Y! A7 ?" a% dSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
7 F7 Q) W _' |- W
- o: `$ c( p. S$ A6 ^" x2 rWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
0 y( w! p2 N& F" Z
! K) c& w8 x: U; _$ ]Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 3 t; W; ^5 {4 @5 |
+ q3 k; x$ Y* t9 nPee.
; o, a9 f& ^" S9 j2 q& I/ Z9 F) x1 b3 D* x; ?
Rinse off and get out of shower.
/ X; o; u5 e, e0 b
" i7 N l* n" Q9 F kPartially dry off.
5 a9 q, r, F! I0 T' a; z1 R$ f) O8 H, L3 L" P
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
. O5 Q- M! M0 P3 X0 Z, F& T+ Q
# ?) I) M7 e( EAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 2 r% k5 h6 ?: c7 t! r
/ K% Y& F" t; c
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
w) P( S, Z9 j7 a' I# ]. p# D; J; T/ A T E5 k
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. : Q2 p( f1 E* @3 E0 y( v6 O( A
: a9 F+ w# w9 Q- p# x( AThrow wet towel on bed.
2 w$ _$ ?# N8 U: S q& J( J9 P& B& s/ [+ Y! G
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
