 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : . A5 m6 O0 y1 `" g% [( @8 H4 F
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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: v: u# n2 J. FWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. / Z* r0 _% ^) R
0 H5 o! r$ R. f- `$ ` cIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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( K" G9 R* m4 T. W# C% x/ ]0 x* DLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- # g, j0 Q( L: }' ~7 ^) t9 A8 m+ D7 b S
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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' q/ {! }8 |! v# k; Q/ H5 gGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. , r6 v5 x7 y7 B, B$ V1 I" }, Q
- L* `+ g9 l* z3 J3 f0 EWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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}% R% I; d4 r7 M( ]- r6 HWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. % j7 |( E& D1 c, p- c: `- h V& g
5 m8 E! j1 z; E: }6 S: gWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs. T8 T/ p; w9 A% t, Z' o) K9 t9 x
' u$ T# I1 u+ @1 WTurn off shower.) e4 b1 I) F6 _- R8 b+ W5 Y
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.( W0 \# @7 E* D! z
5 y9 M% R, P$ [6 ^& T+ TSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. % i5 h/ t* e- z' m8 A/ B" U" Z/ Q
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 3 D4 t8 M! y: `4 p \" D
3 V% W2 [5 a/ K `% ^1 LReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 0 X* _9 o0 u; z# }/ _
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 5 H+ x1 o2 z; C, d* |8 {
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& m4 X2 G- l& ?) E/ AHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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% c3 u7 X3 U xTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom., P' J8 ^8 P p: e+ |
) L* E- {$ d2 [% Q n2 N! o% U1 S* zIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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! }' r! k6 K u1 c |* bLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 3 \) P: z E1 O( O
# L0 j3 } X9 U6 V) fAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. ! R! i; `, w. j# w; R
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 5 Y" g+ g, v( q3 b. r7 A, _
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ) K9 C1 T+ }7 u9 j+ t
4 e( n1 V8 _7 }; l2 ^; D! JFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 3 F7 b6 t$ c% ^- q8 m, F
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. : m+ }. W$ I4 y
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. . K7 K/ c. C' |9 a2 e
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. . g5 A0 {* Q4 w$ }/ q4 }" b: X
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* \ d; U0 h, g$ SRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.+ M8 U) V4 l1 g5 C) D
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. : X/ n% J1 q9 ] y3 w, \. C
5 y2 l% ~) x. ?5 T4 B2 s% U3 ULeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. k9 \- w5 L: X" a @' ?
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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( p, M3 w- W; L8 O) H6 u' u+ `" zIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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