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. C6 g6 K* w/ h5 r( b$ [Why did God make mothers?
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" l0 o% U: B$ S$ J% x0 t1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
" J9 g; ^0 G1 t9 y2. Mostly to clean the house.
( p7 J& s `* o3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 6 A* g* |- O ]! T9 D* g* G2 m
1 G2 z# ^( d& H4 y. eHow did God make mothers?
/ Y6 h: y c# C, M7 y) P1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.* P, s* d& N: B. v" E+ |7 P
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. % ]5 r; ?4 C0 S( n. n: d
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. . {8 b9 K- f$ F& O
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
/ E# w# `$ R% [# U; c* D( X1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. % p# B! O: b/ Z5 D% I
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 2 V2 P6 m. }$ H' g
1. We're related.
5 s' ?; `6 Q6 ?% }2 B" V2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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W, \/ P2 ?$ V+ S! F* |What kind of little girl was your mom?
" y! {, M7 A: K+ ?) p' z0 s1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. L& ^, g+ b- Y
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. ; B; j1 j/ q b6 Y
3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? % R0 S7 A; F7 X/ p
1. His last name.
) f. `: M0 L# F0 t! b9 @* F2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
0 V0 v3 ` ]( \* \; _3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? $ H# K0 a( K/ X; {0 c
( h# L- w- i1 M, S# JWhy did your mom marry your dad?
$ s+ E1 e. Y8 c/ [2 i1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. ~" ]5 T% Q3 B. l/ Z# Z
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 7 A- S+ T! |: s9 ^: \4 F
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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/ ]; `& x$ p+ N, H- VWho's the boss at your house? " E& @" U- z7 I! h3 S/ s
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. * T" H/ p* k# n
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
+ L, ~& a, V2 d4 K1 H; a) s3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
1 G6 I t, \+ S9 y4 T' J1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 1 }4 T9 {# L: \( z1 r8 K4 k) r7 P
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
g9 G/ J% m; e3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
1 @4 h7 \. D, ^+ k# g" O4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. % g7 P% Q& [. ^& S
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What does your mom do in her spare time? ' w% W6 Q2 U. k1 \
1. Mothers don't do spare time.9 E8 Y) |* H% k) N4 ~
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. , R6 F0 g0 `! F; |
2 y- P5 s% s1 A3 s" I# w( ^What would it take to make your mom perfect? $ A. N" B% w- o! e) h% H
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
4 c/ Q; S; b5 T4 {7 }0 \2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
( R% {; ~3 k# t/ J \) ]1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
% g6 i" m0 i/ x, F# ^8 b& \2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.. {! y! g+ L( u) \
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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