 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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% J8 z; Q) m) l6 }5 Z& }2 J9 g1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
" d, G. g1 G8 _- T7 u* G, m2. Mostly to clean the house.
! a' Z( x6 b9 b1 _) n6 N* @3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ; y$ ]& u6 `' @$ o2 C, k1 |
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How did God make mothers?
# E$ e. y/ o+ |/ y( v! i1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.; r& \5 o6 B2 G0 _* O1 Z# v
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 3 n0 V3 \8 g9 D4 x0 _% g
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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. P; h& y" Q7 k& F0 [+ W2 MWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? ! t' @" C' b3 X0 U
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
9 I# i1 T% D% t' {8 u! e2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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$ q7 W0 `' ?$ T& j1 f7 D* TWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 5 S5 g/ L- ^: H0 }& T; |1 A2 T
1. We're related.) p) ]& F2 O, ?% N# U
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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) z0 H- M7 E, W$ }% {" P: YWhat kind of little girl was your mom? * U+ D8 i% L/ n0 h0 |% N
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
6 \; P7 Z) t" s+ V# H2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 1 x: e9 [" g" M" q
3. They say she used to be nice. 8 i+ u( ]+ Y, V% C4 ^6 g
0 C$ ~8 p7 y/ N9 dWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
- {. Z0 w, t K$ E) q2 j5 ~1. His last name.% o" o5 }$ `: Y1 A' m
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
. U. }8 u9 Z7 P9 V& e# b% n3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
, h. X: a9 K3 R) J3 p1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2 }5 E+ {3 k0 `# h2. She got too old to do anything else with him. - \, u4 o, z; L7 Q5 @5 S' g
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? - G1 D4 F- m* _0 \! k; G
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
# i9 J( C1 I2 u% V2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
" v4 Y. J) \; ]" \; o3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. / Z) q# s4 \8 A3 N3 g5 n: ?4 E
9 u0 t9 a8 P" rWhat's the difference between moms & dads? 3 e! P7 w, y: v* v0 Y# _
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
- F. k$ u8 M! R* B8 S+ W6 t2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
0 s6 k; y& j# E) T- ?' ^ @3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
$ B7 H$ u3 X \( h6 D1 B N0 F9 d4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time? 3 w2 ~( w4 Y+ A# d2 W4 w+ {
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
: p: ~: x" L: m- B2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. " Q0 V; b9 e, z9 ~3 x+ C* _2 j. H
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? 2 O- X* N0 Z5 @$ q# ?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
, L& |& C$ k9 F0 _5 Q2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? & ~9 U" }' B) u* |
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. % p6 E4 g4 e* n' A
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.5 k4 P p6 T3 @5 H" g6 T
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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