 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
7 k @ Z2 {& N$ \4 v1 D9 g请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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; J b9 s! s; _0 R" V2 Z1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.9 y: j% h. {6 e6 z# W5 f
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫* w, x# c; C. `; d
8 j" z: Z+ S+ L5 z7 T9 H3 {* ?8 u1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
- j7 Z6 p- Q( [9 T# s `down.
$ J+ v- Q4 _# ^, gWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.) `$ v6 W' b5 `8 i0 H
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.9 V$ ^; U* L8 H {
Let it be.7 ]1 a; y U* r6 o2 o% `
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去* f# E4 ^* D" _6 A6 A" N5 N& r1 U% ^
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it8 J- P7 m+ ?! E5 @5 }( h7 ~9 X/ q9 q
that way." U* y' g6 J5 `, L3 ]1 X; k
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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4 z2 o& h; a: f2 r7 @1. Crying is blackmail.5 x6 @& Y* _4 g' @( {* z: D/ b
1，哭泣是敲诈
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% ]2 y; V, D# M7 Q6 q1. Ask for what you want.; ]0 J( Q9 J5 {( Y8 a
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
1 z) C. W& r4 b$ G, V2 wStrong hints do not work!
- n$ v6 f; X$ }2 ~ H8 IObvious hints do not work!
" T5 G* ~' M) Q$ T7 `4 FJust say it!9 W6 L& D/ u3 Z- k8 Y# y5 m
1，你想要什么就说
! N/ U& h; u0 a. @' _5 y9 X我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 6 D7 N- a) y$ M8 R& ]
question.
; M! ~ Q8 T9 c* [! v# L8 V1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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( b- F$ W3 t; A. u6 h1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
$ S+ e/ j0 e$ m' d0 X9 T. ?what we do.
: z6 B! N$ n( D: i9 {Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
# w; A0 n% n1 A) b1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。$ N0 z6 r5 E, v+ r
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
; c8 Z, z H) k3 p* t; j: i0 t1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.3 Z k* g8 ?# v" m
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.& N: U' U3 v; K
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us% W# g# q$ d% y# F3 | p
to act like soap opera guys.% a2 b. p U* P3 X0 A1 e9 U# I8 N. h
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们0 O) s1 N3 W" w8 t/ j7 P
" ^! g. B& V+ K0 Y# E# {1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.6 F. }# ~& Y8 {' A! N% E% U
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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7 j1 \3 F8 v$ }: e( K+ c- H1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways& t9 d4 l" G$ \7 c5 O
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.2 K8 `3 L# ^7 L- C
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。+ ]0 d7 ]& ^ Q" t
% c3 d1 m; V* k4 C7 N（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）+ b' L G& _0 \# g/ L$ t
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
. `' b/ t% k& z, qdone. Not both.( ?6 _( `3 ~4 L& P
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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$ W! @0 v) V- F; O2 t1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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7 T4 s D+ p& i1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.* |8 J% v% b5 m2 h& E8 j
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
0 ^! z' }8 W- vPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
) n4 E% m9 n0 Y# O$ aWe have no idea what mauve is.5 Q3 {, z9 h/ K. H5 f5 a
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.6 a5 c* P0 \' w5 V) q# m8 y
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
! b& D* r6 W; A& ]: m( S. ?nothing's wrong.9 Y, }0 _4 R& Y. j; Q% E. ~
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. v/ W/ Z$ x) C. b, v% ^5 b1 C
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer% a& u) R! D" ]% P4 r
you don't want to hear.- g2 R s: F0 U5 k: @
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
, ^# b6 E! [1 d% H: v% q- Xfine...Really.& L4 p. l3 O6 @& ?
4 G' q/ r: z/ Z0 v0 m8 b1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to0 E' H* b! I7 K
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.; ^) `7 B( ^! N) Z
! @( `& K( T/ S& ^' ]7 f, X1. You have enough clothes.' u1 n& t a1 M/ Y( q; e2 @ z
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1. You have too many shoes.; z: q- d( D5 r: e: m
( f9 S2 j! a: s/ }5 Y1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! e/ M. l! F) _+ A6 t* y1 u9 V
1 b& `2 E* t$ L4 c# m1 v9 C* A1. Thank you for reading this.
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# W* k C& H% U* YYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;$ ^! i+ f( q4 ?( y
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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. G. _& e8 \6 s9 n' |Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
1 Z* n& S. L! p/ Q& A+ RPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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