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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:# n3 H6 b" |5 O5 G* P$ E
2 {: ~8 s# B% b3 ^1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.3 }& s: E e; j x* W! }% s$ }2 Z
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
$ l2 d* f% r: |$ B, }, Jhour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday0 \6 k( X- Z: D" y
morning. ` L" G3 i! z
! M e0 i( p5 O3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
; P. g8 e2 a! H/ h! X/ S4 x: Yyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a% f, h. w3 Q: [1 B
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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% F4 e9 Y& I, r/ o. Y) g4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
$ |, }- S3 n* L1 J, ^& B1 G" Uown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
Q! L" G1 E) o" ?muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires3 g' j% b/ |# c0 N, ]' Y/ W9 m+ I7 ^6 c
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
3 n L8 N4 V7 [phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,: r) @2 p/ o7 h% ^1 q! d; v" J
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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1 I [% l6 X) }! D9 }& d6 ?2 ]6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can( d7 B% J4 d/ \" P2 t# E
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
5 n8 T& Z/ e8 p" Xhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
2 g0 _0 [- `3 d2 m% L, s5 othe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot" ^% I& ^! g/ b1 h1 f q
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
, v+ r4 i# i' F* m( L0 }vehicle through the intersection.* h0 H; K7 E! i7 j6 m5 s- s
! D2 t$ \. I7 d$ ^/ J, q6 a# @: M8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
! W; [& s. O S- w8 @2 k' Bbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
1 E( [! d- d6 e2 ^" W4 ?8 Kday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
. w- H$ z* ]5 h/ l; y9 J% Imore construction starts everyday.& K; q) o+ u4 v0 P p2 Z
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,8 l+ x( m& H% v0 _' E$ ~. z9 c: y
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,( ~* L n( J1 p
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same. D3 U" \4 N; T1 X9 d( {
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye- ]" v* y" ?# |' i" M9 `7 K( E
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and/ C& J* d9 ?. V: v
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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/ _- M( N, r5 m- ?" s# N11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
8 f7 a6 M; t! Q A; z3 jshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally9 f$ R9 Q/ S5 p* }) ~# i# ^
Activated.'+ V9 M2 l. s: L: F) @+ M7 y! |
4 M9 o2 E& E; `12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,4 G* V9 t0 }% a3 }
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
V/ W; N- [; m' p" e Yaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot. q6 \: ^0 H& Z# F' U
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur9 n" v L6 j% X% I7 n
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
0 ]9 P0 o3 U$ F) O, p) hblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
