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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:$ e% b+ j3 t6 Q1 n" }# ~
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
4 U! I: s( N/ N3 r G5 |% `3 m) \hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
" Q5 q+ r% t+ \morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
& P& A4 r3 g# n1 M hyou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
W2 V7 P2 w. H; ~) H) k; [" zlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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! L+ Q4 ~9 }+ e4 T4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
" Y& C3 x0 i$ q; o5 \/ N7 town version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
% r+ [: N( o& k6 S( wmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires
+ \1 @+ v% ~4 j3 J* Cgo second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
1 K! t6 x' S# a, D' H: uphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,) \3 R0 I% W/ e& n0 z
cussed out, and possibly shot.4 I3 y1 B8 K5 K
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can- R) j' l# K7 s) D- \0 L( f, {. b. ^& Y
get you shot.
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2 O6 K1 a; Q4 N. G. v, u [+ S7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
+ l2 q8 @* o& V$ g/ Jhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at+ l1 E' b" n, \1 Z( Z0 Z
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
8 O0 r! Z ]/ I. A0 oyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
9 g ~1 y+ ]1 r& `) J5 Gvehicle through the intersection.5 Z' p. z- m7 B2 i1 R( ~ d
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour! |" s! _1 A4 g7 }; @. `
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
+ m; I1 B( s1 Zday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
' U/ Q0 Z! D8 u9 |1 |# T( J# {4 fmore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,, _ T3 v$ M, k& m+ _
deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
# k) E: l% b! y; Ksquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.5 z& z6 u& e$ c+ g U$ D5 E' E, q
$ I- H) V- E9 Q3 G! M4 Q( \7 f10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
' g2 q3 F3 U/ [2 W4 g5 t0 r' ~road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye; z$ L" z% n4 M1 R9 Q2 j
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and8 A+ o6 n* E A( z5 J
66 Street are also the same road; got it?8 n5 O8 u8 E2 H. H) @! D
1 r/ i1 N' |+ c* X+ r0 M3 Z11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
4 P7 A3 T/ P0 _shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
1 o1 k, [" M2 t: K; v a9 G- KActivated.'# A$ z3 m" Q* |, s0 Y- \$ X/ W N
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,/ s- u: s8 e& S; N6 _ t
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'; ]* y9 c# v; x* B: m0 o
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot./ R4 C. L& [ T! M5 B
# x7 `" a- K: a6 T6 _# F! {13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
' s- B5 @# i% X% U0 m& Llined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
8 G- W+ M- O6 }! y1 P- wblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
