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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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- F' K% \* O) O. L1 a9 @# i6 g, JI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.+ h- a8 W( e. p4 Z5 u  |) O: `
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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3 S3 b/ X& G) p; Z"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"0 r2 {; D% A: |. [

- H/ D: X% D; x3 u1 zI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:
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- f0 E, _8 t; B0 H"What's the 2nd Amendment?"$ A. B( g7 N9 w# V
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"  C) L& _  a! P

& ]* S3 o% v" u7 {$ |" gI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?) S0 p/ D# R% }8 {) g- p6 O

' ^8 M7 ^! [: F* p8 BI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!) V1 V! D* [5 s* E3 U+ z5 z, N
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"0 X" v) Y  }3 S9 \

8 {7 i' A) k- p% E: @Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”9 i2 [. f8 w/ |% S- W
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!3 C& Z: G; y5 z* z$ P4 I
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:# P) O( O- Q- m8 L. C
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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$ N' X6 g, t3 g8 b2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms., M  B( ?% g- J* g9 Q8 C1 w8 G2 J

1 }3 C. u% T& y6 M# Q7 V3 g. C2 u# z"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.2 T/ N: R1 s" b# x$ a! k
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means: - ^* U$ }( ?7 l+ H, Y) D/ Q1 m
a young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。0 z; S3 ^# v. ^& s# c
怎么理解?
% B& c/ U! \# l* E4 c50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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' [+ R: Q3 |- @4 D' v: D# @* L3 F不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
: F) w4 U; j/ Z' Z" L怎么理解?7 _0 B1 T9 b$ @8 X. J, Z/ C8 N# `: O
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?% M: O7 |/ `. J6 o
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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. A& w; }* c/ R. E5 v1 L: q我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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