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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.& t  P, b. |+ {( d" Q
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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3 V3 N1 K( f2 [6 u4 j" r"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"" W) g! s# a9 T& x1 q7 _

& z4 m$ m  R" T' [/ e9 W4 xI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 Q$ Y; G$ H* S* L1 ~" h/ |
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And the second one was:! P" h8 Y! M$ o6 w, j" o) A* q! R5 {) s

, U; p' h7 s* y& F1 W: h"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?0 s4 P1 c2 {, |7 D- r

# X5 v6 _( W. r/ f, C( s"What is Roe vs. Wade?"4 x% h3 h* Q2 i1 w2 |
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?2 q0 P2 T5 i1 y" I9 ]7 u

" M9 B6 G% P- z/ JI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."  n' X- |% j8 U! Q

/ [6 v1 S6 _& |So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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& O: W. Y0 O4 g; b2 \- RNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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: z; v+ D' ^- w2 g/ T9 g6 uThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!3 v# P, T) |1 P' K  n2 w2 w" ^

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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.$ s, ^3 {1 |. ^: Y% K
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion., T6 @: H( V( [6 h2 H
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.$ V& ~8 @, ]4 L1 a/ ^  l
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
: u0 u# }( S2 j: q6 ka young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。* p1 Q# |1 M% n
怎么理解?) T$ O6 r" k2 M. x4 ?
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116 . A6 h4 F& b' U3 d; K5 @

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7 x, A$ C5 K- l! w8 d: {% o4 a$ I  C, I; Y不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。* \' Z9 C7 K3 o  l
怎么理解?
3 k  r; ?! f5 F6 t50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?+ V9 j" c. N9 F; h8 ?6 J7 j
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
8# 朝阳
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  P% Y; y3 m8 ]* ?& x7 e# C% `我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
大型搬家
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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