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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.* c' S* n; ]4 ]$ G+ M2 i
( M+ q% A; O, I7 q! g, T* d7 s3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
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$ ?7 k" d; B3 q3 F) g; ^) P: E4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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1 X, F, t8 \7 `6 X3 O. G/ k; U5 M7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.& ~% B4 Q- _; v
+ k) H4 U3 {- ]1 V$ b: G0 J8 X- t8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask* k8 I L! E) Q; j# ^5 N
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
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: Q5 I x! a/ b) l5 K5 H8 I9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.4 w7 \& l2 g8 [4 a5 r/ o
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11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.( {4 N! Q1 ~% F* |1 g5 F) K
! M9 v. l P# ~( N$ c8 j. C8 b13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!) G' }$ W8 T7 f/ \
w- h' D# E: F3 x" G7 T$ H: {! d14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!)/ s& B+ P7 W! q
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
