 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
|
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
: n( O) g: y! k8 k$ B, R* V* L) p# P% P+ F$ `
Let's face it
" p; x2 q. j% H) E/ m0 `6 V$ fEnglish is a stupid language.
$ J- A7 C2 E6 `4 g" |, E/ u0 zThere is no egg in the eggplant, S3 i/ W5 Z- k
No ham in the hamburger5 i: S5 v( u& l7 T, X/ E/ t4 w
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.- v; x4 {; L! w5 l/ Y0 w* S
English muffins were not invented in England
$ A) o6 F& C: W. R, n; EFrench fries were not invented in France.0 O g U! I, c" Q8 T
) m- ^3 V/ G5 y5 x, _
We sometimes take English for granted
k: O8 q1 |; z% l- ~But if we examine its paradoxes we find that0 \* ]9 e I7 _ o8 G% h
Quicksand takes you down slowly
6 ^: u% a1 o3 g! X$ B0 GBoxing rings are square6 W; z8 g: ]4 h
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 0 l& b8 p- x. C% Z3 N. S" ]
" ~* R7 `& ]! Y3 J" n. E
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
, _# t! F# W- M. }If the plural of tooth is teeth. |( U% _0 K! w
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
% P! w* h4 x! Q0 t2 G6 ^If the teacher taught,
& w! N4 i) c' u" D! r/ D* iWhy didn't the preacher praught.( U( P1 z1 N$ Z# u+ ^; `
' H: U4 x7 r* l8 \$ [, WIf a vegetarian eats vegetables# O4 b( k& W5 `# J" N4 N
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
( @, b( g" q+ [! \: pWhy do people recite at a play* B0 j4 O4 t {1 C8 F
Yet play at a recital?( ~6 n& Z- y6 s# {( ~
Park on driveways and( h. y6 A7 C, z X% A' y
Drive on parkways
5 b+ h& i g* U8 H; A: z
" ?4 H' h- S3 a m& aYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy) e1 B8 u, b3 u) E+ m' J7 ?( r; z
Of a language where a house can burn up as1 ~' }# Z" X' z* ~1 r* R
It burns down
! i$ ]! U% d! v8 G0 \/ W5 ZAnd in which you fill in a form * \' _! ]9 R* g0 M0 A2 X6 p# h
By filling it out" C" D9 u8 u* |: W( |" u
And a bell is only heard once it goes!% e% Q/ o! v5 K- Y+ j
) t& n3 l" h; A
English was invented by people, not computers
9 t/ ]8 d. y$ \9 e6 {3 V( {And it reflects the creativity of the human race
. B0 T6 `% _) e, ~/ y$ W/ m3 R(Which of course isn't a race at all)
! _* o7 o' C- U- E
! N# B7 ~( l# \4 }0 c* rThat is why# ]) A% R x/ H# ]6 B$ O4 I, p
When the stars are out they are visible
9 S8 ?* c8 h+ ?" Z' H: K+ zBut when the lights are out they are invisible
/ f& h# ^ W6 pAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch0 a' _% B3 q1 v) E6 Y' |
It starts& ~" c1 N: }2 }( |, V0 n. c
But when I wind up this observation,
& n! x5 _# a9 ?5 J9 e* _It ends. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
楼主
