English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
2 K4 w' @5 a: n7 TEnglish is a stupid language.
- Y+ D" N( Y. dThere is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
) [6 P/ U, I- V/ LAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
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9 J9 T# S9 _# P1 B% _' ]We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
, N% E" I2 S' \, P/ H$ o& R' N( EQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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( c' v) ^! s) W9 I/ g+ A% K/ fIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
; l$ Q! d. l1 z- xShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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6 P  P: \& {! AIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
; \2 S, s' {# b0 y. gWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
4 G: a# p. b" ?! R# w: JWhy do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
6 z; J' R( g; e/ HPark on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
5 T9 ~4 j$ E% @6 g% X8 COf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
9 b1 X) t* n; S9 @3 r: b8 CAnd in which you fill in a form
  Y5 d2 z# f" S2 N/ h2 u* @By filling it out
# |; i) N6 {) U( |# iAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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$ l" }; D+ ]5 [' H; m' E3 yEnglish was invented by people, not computers
  ]* Q6 U7 P7 l- C& Q0 s# c) jAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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; e9 }/ u( @: B- Q2 z0 MThat is why
; G# @) s: o- @  X! Z5 wWhen the stars are out they are visible
5 T0 @' u' G) xBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
  a4 e4 u. l' Y! E: mIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
2 c$ h% X( K2 ~  m; T7 h* |$ E- xIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
! e2 E9 J% k9 f( Q# T7 d1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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