 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident
~# n" [% ?: a0 A1 n3 W4 \One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
$ K! a7 [/ @. k# Z9 c
" n! F; Z, q# f- v4 n0 e9 I0 X2 k- RThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. h! w! @- m0 Y( F ?) O) K
" Q% R7 Q3 ^# f* M- x
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
" u6 ]" P; u7 C! \6 ^1 ~4 C- t0 @
. E1 N) K% k# q* ^4 GFurious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
, P& ^4 m% B2 _4 n1 ^4 @8 h* [+ b1 S4 j# U% o5 D3 V" D$ e# P
The blonde started laughing.
0 c s" Z J# T+ u. z
4 N' B: C- V& b0 `1 e4 T' KThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.
5 T f8 |6 u2 U# A l
8 N$ m/ u8 k4 K0 J0 H" D+ GThis time the blonde laughed even harder.
' o8 t/ D4 X$ ~$ M* \5 _* L* v6 B5 C8 T) h/ U$ m
Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
/ X. t$ G7 z2 f4 n7 O5 _1 |# g }8 u
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.
1 g4 ` M( F- f# V f- v! T4 a3 J3 Z: v# P. G5 `
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"1 k4 K0 W* d2 }7 s3 d# `
9 C3 M/ K. Y) T5 |% H- ?5 M/ eRowing Your Boat, s2 _9 s$ y& t3 H
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.3 Y' P, E& S0 G! ?2 i4 T- z
I- w2 e4 c5 H4 A2 P
The driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"; n! F2 A) B* \. B
$ X8 ~; ^* H# n$ _' zTo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
2 h9 h3 p' [6 u$ `* S' ~6 N8 U9 l `6 A1 E5 V7 q: n
I Want to Buy That
( `* G& F2 c* Q3 u9 Y8 tA blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
5 ~6 t3 Y+ s( P1 o! N" x$ S, d; U
( U0 S# H/ h$ ?" p; KThe clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
0 o. c! F8 Y; {9 r# p$ \7 O; h3 ?6 w* X3 J! ?" C; r
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
" c: ]( Y% u0 r# c+ R. g+ }% e+ |! x3 M" ]4 I2 I
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.8 U. a; w$ S* t/ d
5 l4 E; o2 y+ {Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.' R, A" O& R+ ?9 u) x4 X+ O
2 Q, z. |& V0 W1 P) BTo her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.7 U* q; }% X( @! |
$ [7 _! A! n2 b3 I0 L5 vThe blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"" c' X1 a/ s6 Z3 i; S5 Q0 X
" }5 j% S; p' X
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
' ^7 U; G, G$ b6 \: R0 D C
; ?! C2 M, T. r" ~3 d# kAre You Really Sure?
) o# U- K2 |" R5 n7 |$ UA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" ]" r0 A+ j% Y" G5 G( b
. F8 ~7 f) [" c- @% {; k# uIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."
/ U8 ^, `$ y, E, p7 c z6 [) @- z) _2 z- K' a
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"9 k" Y' D. m; N% C/ \' y3 q
, |* N) D) X. j6 q) p3 `, ?1 i
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."2 M7 ~7 u" @ V, {5 V- a9 c
" q Z+ [5 h7 Z/ n! h9 kBlonde Sky Divers
0 F" p9 B) d9 W6 Y1 ?' P) C8 }A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
F b( }% K" {6 l }9 g$ ]3 A! ]# ^# D+ s. o/ ^( c1 i
The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens." n; H+ l2 [7 X+ a9 O( b4 P( g
. P4 n' A" S; x- @- L! l; @She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.1 }9 Q% {. m, F9 N
* a5 R' b: M3 ^9 g7 e& v! ~The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
5 A$ r) ?( c2 j' I& ]2 l& l
2 Z: a& N! E$ o[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|