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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 5 O' `. F4 v/ v
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2 b7 u* j c3 `Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.& l" s& y% v! h$ u
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. / x) r1 f' @& R- d* V" {
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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' j$ J6 H" Q3 N! WLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
9 U( [/ B) _# }/ p e. @make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.) O9 _. v: Q, o) ]$ A. Q( K4 ]: ~
! ], ?$ w% V: U& dGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. # a- X3 ?4 r" B4 T( l4 ]2 T
; V g9 L0 N5 W& _+ a: cWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. $ p' b1 d0 a1 ^" C _" g1 v! j
5 C2 [# a( d9 u0 XWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.2 q$ j9 z* O# K1 e
D) D# t# U1 N; Y; A9 x `Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.. I, o2 V( U4 A* c% |# Q" B
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. : B/ S! J! d4 g m W
6 y( l7 o1 p. R* RWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 1 s% n3 J4 Y7 G- M6 a
; s5 a6 v* \1 `. g& yRinse conditioner off hair.
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6 {1 x1 v; ~0 T7 T9 z) pShave armpits and legs.+ ], E; ~( r" m
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Turn off shower.
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9 a) F! i) x$ e" L. ?7 r& qSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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; T% t; \' {( r1 vSpray mold spots with Tilex. & k' @9 e$ M9 x7 \5 p8 Y
0 B: B/ L S8 f0 Y5 zGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. " q4 @- B7 y$ |) U) W
4 W, V% n5 @% [7 hWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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& C0 e5 [9 ~8 J$ d$ `Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 4 r4 |9 x E# B, o+ R4 Y
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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; G6 d% m; m! yTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 9 x" K# u3 D. i- {
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 1 i# K% @& {4 J1 W4 r
2 a) d3 J/ [+ W+ W% `Look at your manly physique in the mirror. ) x+ Y7 p: [/ W n& Y+ P
& b( \% y$ Q9 E! g8 _: u2 a4 [Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. * ?9 l) D" c$ z6 ?( E( [
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. . h6 C; R0 Z' p; p% p5 `0 U: n# s
7 U6 u" y% F* X7 GWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 8 d& z$ C) y$ s) R, z8 {+ H$ }8 B
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Pee. " Y+ s7 D0 D V9 |
7 z8 S; q: i8 Z; t9 M! w* V' }Rinse off and get out of shower. 3 x1 D2 _; |; o( L L
; [, z6 P; K. A: K3 S6 b$ [Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 0 D" j2 X& t: ?# A
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. $ k5 [ {: K' x% P' M/ F4 ^3 ?- X
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 2 U1 ~. c" o# d9 o
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 9 r0 ?# y! P) l" K: S3 y
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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" i n! k; ^. J1 p1 l. uIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
