 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
' L; N1 a4 Q; C% [; C K* |! Z8 ^! f. y: N, U% ?9 K+ r
5 q# a8 P3 q. K3 m) C
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------* m5 n4 f2 I' v
" O C* M* ?. p. D' D! T
* X0 E$ m% A" F& G# |2 x , F% y1 R1 p- p( f8 ^2 `
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.; P& z+ B$ O. Q1 S$ Q; I! B
; w9 M6 ]1 V0 ^/ x* B
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
, y8 ~( a+ T1 L3 R# L; r& Q% z6 H! L4 A7 x" x/ H
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.% e3 @% w5 K/ L5 ?" p& H
. n5 r& n# I ]6 z! p1 c5 g# z0 BLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
& S2 a6 a$ y) _ C3 \% a9 Zmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.8 M9 l- X$ a3 b0 F: W7 q4 j1 @
8 Z$ T6 [/ R- g v1 }Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
& M3 o) k9 T4 o5 U
0 j* S" H: v2 q* G; jWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
/ p' d7 F. x3 }+ W# k, v+ ?7 o* q3 m. I( y. r
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.& a$ L' S% t0 V
/ s, W. M: o; U( R* VCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
* \% O8 c1 s0 q* `, m/ t6 i' v5 {2 h; [2 m! |4 h
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
# P5 \% e w; `% M' q$ d' C
6 L, A2 |) x* K$ \; i' p5 {Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 1 m- R$ m" C! A. _" w6 V2 j
6 h3 b# x6 g) D+ @3 S( @& _. _; O
Rinse conditioner off hair.
: _- q" {0 s& E
) G+ x9 H6 f- v% ZShave armpits and legs.1 M& A2 t. k$ v& j' M: [
) s; \0 `7 x5 z3 F7 K- C+ \
Turn off shower.1 ~* {6 l* a* k3 g
% n' J2 r1 s4 V0 d- |Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
2 g7 U+ G- b9 P1 v3 V9 m$ Q+ D9 f8 D
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
1 m. X+ j7 ]! m- H7 H
! K! K6 K' D }: ?) \$ S7 o0 {Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
) f1 T; w3 V' J4 Z9 l4 G: [
7 ^ }( U& `+ B2 |* s9 _' dWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
" h L+ ~# ^9 v6 p3 `; d9 y* C; v! T# c% H
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
) F3 y5 W6 ?9 C
7 U, `- E. H! | p& G4 k/ ]8 h" j2 GIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 0 c1 c* u s. ]6 Y6 O4 p
+ V7 V. v& q. v( c& D1 q# q+ P' u: E' y/ U- [; R+ }
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
2 m& ?. i% {' W) K# [& ]& O# y A- _2 N2 I3 Q2 Y
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2 P, l' t* d6 o' m4 W4 ^6 C
8 N: |$ b; M9 H4 P2 D+ x
Walk naked to the bathroom.: w' W0 J! [. a; v5 _( d
9 t+ D, S9 k3 NIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
6 Y% u( i- g( O, x5 R& K
% e* a2 u* K) ELook at your manly physique in the mirror.
7 @& w5 E8 W4 i# Z( L6 [& F, V
& ?7 n$ S: v' t V1 j/ vAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. ( E) T+ E( D" x
* j" ?) }: C, T) o% o" t
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
% e. D/ \1 l. {! w5 d/ o9 A$ g# k" R0 t3 u5 i4 c' L4 x
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 6 F4 r- P6 b' ]* e3 ]
( t! l$ C6 ~: n; Y7 i0 Z% R* KFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. * c7 Y/ c6 J' ~" G8 G- R6 }; E4 G
0 z, v% t+ b$ ~+ [
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. ) j, U- c9 G1 O
, e: R) b# n1 B" ^2 xWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
# Y! p- x7 J8 h5 m* r
/ t5 _" s3 ~# sWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. + [ K% L, _# v& a; S7 T) j
6 v& V# a; k( O) d. A
Pee.
; E* G; X# u' U, T) F( o! v* k `( N! l4 f
Rinse off and get out of shower.
1 ]5 Q% J( {: b
, F: P% }3 F* i" P% ~Partially dry off.# |! a {3 o/ s3 U C
, d; u4 i- {9 ~! kFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 6 L6 e0 }( N6 ]
0 K2 j8 v/ e( D8 @0 R
Admire wiener size in mirror again. , w4 h" n1 m: w; k
) d5 i# E& H0 S+ ?
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 8 `5 Z/ n& h; u$ B: U' w
# g* b. k/ ?' F8 oReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 3 V! D9 L9 [% p$ i: N# a2 V7 F3 Y. i! d
) w5 Q$ T% D9 u( p; M5 rThrow wet towel on bed.
+ Q8 l3 B# Z1 T) q9 O
0 l0 E$ L9 t8 Z [1 yIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
