 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
& U( b2 O7 R" y9 `2 `) V! C0 O2 n i- p% M, N
% G- K" G* v2 K# V( H1 W--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
! n3 c! y" }* I. j o: y, Z% g6 o, |8 u0 H$ R* p0 y/ Q9 H8 ^
" i, {) R9 @7 o3 m 8 ]8 H( L$ L5 L A; w: S; \- B
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
$ [& n8 z0 |1 w1 j7 D. H7 ?* E! \/ `
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
0 h; h( n' ~5 [: N2 _# I; U
G7 n3 U% M# t6 i; ~9 t' J: w+ E4 PIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas., B, W4 }+ ~" ~3 t( y' L, T E
' _/ R f; M/ Q2 n, |
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 4 {9 Y% ]8 ?- g% G$ O r2 r
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.+ _2 G7 v& J! {$ S
! j* @0 n2 W( @7 ~1 \
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. A0 x/ Y8 G& o
1 _- @8 T& [' W, x5 }
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 1 Q4 f, x/ i, v( I
3 W. C- ?# G' c6 {5 [! n
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
8 C! k" q, i; T' r% V+ C7 U: ^6 f* s# B& n& o/ i
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..5 H' `6 m/ w7 K7 }
3 u: j. O0 T" u: {7 w& r
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 7 b1 { a/ { ?
- d8 Y& b4 B* P6 _& u
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. : L2 e: Z$ a7 N6 @
7 H% ^: u* \, x4 y( [8 wRinse conditioner off hair.4 J4 ?" q1 @$ T) Q5 v G# S' S2 A
2 N6 I5 y. L; x: i5 r! ?6 S
Shave armpits and legs.
/ `; ~/ C8 n$ s- z
+ g' ~+ l: [; A) }: ?3 kTurn off shower.3 O1 A9 Q, _/ P5 ~( k0 v9 _( u
& _ S2 N, A& z. ? j$ t
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
: v, |. {$ e8 m6 G8 c! Q% G& l
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
. c4 [& W+ ^ M& y1 _/ [6 t1 N4 X4 i/ a! p2 I# b( {
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. / ^5 ]3 O9 G# u8 S2 w2 n, Y
- n' U7 m6 f. x2 {) O* U3 Y
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. " {* E. A2 P$ R1 T
+ z- d8 [! U6 t# z' N/ M* c- F
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
+ ~% {6 K8 j/ `# A# p4 {) l6 q3 _* ]: L9 V4 z
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ; }8 p d4 M: R* T
" c) g* F# \ S4 s* a
& {$ e6 Y0 S/ b; _5 A1 LHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
1 _; x( O. V; J u! Q M1 b) z/ G& e1 ^; \2 g5 a) o
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. & C) X+ {: i3 H* V m8 M. h
: M T' w7 ~( k3 C. b9 B' t6 G1 _8 ]* d
Walk naked to the bathroom.
& ?: q: ~- _6 V: d1 V0 }7 ]# [( {% k- ^. U
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. * _/ A* T$ U% y: r' u; L% M
U- b" H/ G7 x! ]: Y/ }, ~! LLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 4 q+ J3 k M: o$ N" `6 a
1 j" P. h* X- d; v/ ?9 wAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
{' S+ [! _2 D7 e
9 ~: C/ z. ~: X9 M" D$ rGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. ' d& U& Y& G0 d" i8 U. b
% P. R1 x! X2 \5 A$ k2 f
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. # y. p% ?( A, E
( z" p" F: F* W1 ~0 [
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
$ f4 j' q. G' F( k: n3 C5 K9 b4 u
; _: d7 e* o0 Z" c4 ?( mSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. E. S- D2 M% I- m( J- H+ j
3 R7 F& v* d0 s* ^Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
( u; s$ H: v. m) ^! @
( Q7 t" E( ?" HWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
; N6 N9 o- L+ A6 S8 }4 k
3 D, N$ _1 B2 DPee.
; p+ ]: x+ K2 }) A2 G
' t0 G! |, Z4 \6 T, S8 A6 KRinse off and get out of shower.
8 [# k7 z6 H. f% a6 E7 d! e3 s8 X& R
Partially dry off.
0 V) {" g/ C9 K/ h/ I9 m( V9 x
: M# b6 c: B* G0 y& L1 k7 aFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
$ \3 E' g( N" b; z3 Y' a
" d* L/ R! [* h% \, H1 l3 o# s) rAdmire wiener size in mirror again. + p) S9 f: i) t3 y
- z: k2 S V( ^: l& QLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 7 n6 l1 ~2 X& D$ ^7 P; l
1 r7 v) U# s, x
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. # |5 W$ K' g* Z! E" D- x a) t
( N( Y1 v9 B }: f/ p. I2 e" XThrow wet towel on bed.
& B5 o* s: u. H5 |7 d2 A3 \8 W8 q" a$ x1 d' {8 c; w6 b1 e
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
