 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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7 |9 Y0 P$ d% L7 [& `Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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! u; V% n6 H% V0 CWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. / C; `# c1 `$ G9 A* J
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. z' @% O8 @' f: _6 K8 y: `
* Y. z$ [' q6 E2 H( w) `0 GLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 4 A# l/ L% u, j5 i6 \' x
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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8 g: z* P3 H, B# {& _5 S& aGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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7 k K% a% v: U$ KWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..* ?7 T1 J* d; z$ z
- z: d/ K, E2 {Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. # B, b" Q/ |8 t4 J$ P% |
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ) g' ]$ y+ K' i* j+ I
3 G) m0 O1 Z) c! J" d4 _" qRinse conditioner off hair.) `2 C( L3 K( _& H
' j5 H: n7 m# UShave armpits and legs.9 G K8 J7 i8 C9 N# \2 i& S' z1 e
+ }; H4 z& w( K+ \$ rTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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" m& x0 k) v' b2 J3 c+ Z( LSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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$ i0 c; F8 U' A8 tGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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* G# C I3 U* c; W2 Y. w9 D: W3 V" @Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 4 w5 E$ Y4 w# ]" P% e
) t; J2 }: Y' t. m+ KIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ' M" P' i% M- `% L4 n* e2 @
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: , F- p/ z2 ]' s3 Z
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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) l- V! \7 m/ [' o [0 P/ R0 LWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / y; ?9 T6 L {: h* d5 S) C
1 U# U. s/ @# f# ?) Y: PLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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O4 Z1 F+ L% r& X7 v0 |1 HAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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$ q, A9 t/ x) C- N& FGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 9 w- q$ L& w- z0 g( d% P3 c& K
; w- E8 ~6 S5 E; }* }: MBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 3 |9 J+ ]. V! [+ {/ z
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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; M7 d. y# T4 M) z$ x Z/ DWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. % j" E- }( a: ~
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ; A5 z9 W' h; @9 }7 N2 R8 S' H
" i9 H) d% T/ Z7 a- _" TPee. 4 k8 s- A5 _% p2 U* n X& V
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Rinse off and get out of shower. 8 I( S/ ?1 k! {3 N. N8 a* s9 h
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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; s! |3 N: l/ U) l6 [Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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0 n) L# F/ u. Q, b6 m( a( UReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. / P6 k) `6 v$ s) ?6 w* t9 B; l
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Throw wet towel on bed. 8 Y- L3 _! p0 N4 S8 H
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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