 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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; [2 c) z6 O5 `" Z6 kTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 5 d0 d) \2 X' O/ L( p$ S
. d( V3 o# l) W+ [/ |If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ( q' b' [1 I1 {& g7 @3 Q1 Z+ ]
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.! |, E7 k- E0 \4 g
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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# R4 ^1 H8 Y6 @8 H+ p" \$ \Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.# l K- @7 X& _& Y" e- [2 K8 i
8 W- m3 r$ v. QCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..( j9 F; K% y1 H4 u' x
. x# Z2 S% ?' w% J- y7 GWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ' ~/ L! q6 t0 y6 b7 E2 T6 b* N2 u
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower." C, E' f7 ^( N+ N- C* G7 q
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower./ p5 r/ r0 \; |
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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7 c/ v h/ f( d7 mGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ; p5 m' H4 n" m3 s& G
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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) c8 N2 u7 D! z! n% r* HReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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& ^5 Q. l( X0 Y4 B3 C& X$ P8 FTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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- ]+ m* q. c( X1 Q& |If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. & J" i& u+ l& }1 u
5 c6 a% h0 O/ A5 m; w5 x3 sLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 6 T u' n" }6 W+ |9 v2 l& j, @
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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) o+ l( u" X9 Y" NGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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7 i( E2 p- s+ G2 R7 t" |Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. V' R( _5 b5 j5 T: j7 I
" y' w$ ?; ? fWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. & S3 a5 a' P! M" \# ^
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. : B" G8 [6 h' f1 N. m6 v; F# t I
. G o" o6 g' ?& N8 G+ o* x) @Pee.
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6 g8 \5 ~2 l. `4 M0 T' d5 Q0 ~Rinse off and get out of shower. # \7 B0 a5 s& H- T, L9 J
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Partially dry off.& d) e; e5 R$ L5 O( k
' Q4 s. D3 l8 a, f2 _: A, |4 i+ k& c) l0 bFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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2 j$ r7 E, Y. j" K8 }4 j& o0 aAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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. Y) c+ k( o9 V" X4 @ t4 C, YLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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; j& j+ B& J3 q/ |Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
