 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 4 v4 U. r% L8 d( ~& y6 v
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" q* R ~3 W8 o2 ~0 ~0 g4 YTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.& @# {$ L7 P9 z5 W1 h
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 2 Q- K7 v- p, z; D/ c: ~# _
* ], W* B9 b; a8 U# DIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.& p& f* ~" E$ M$ l: x/ ^
2 W/ p# v3 Y0 [# m& e9 m+ E9 _Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
* e: T/ Z, G) H& @) r T! N2 s* @5 o5 Dmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.8 Z# x* a w6 C+ I0 x( q) |+ M
F+ }1 u5 W8 I/ V" g$ PGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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- ^: G" X' g- Q# M' |Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 7 ~1 ?$ j8 g4 z: x( r2 ]' W/ Y
8 j- _' Z( L8 V) k" } ]; R; XWash your hair again to make sure it's clean. b3 o; ^0 @; m- l; K) g) `- U3 N
8 g+ E$ @. n# S5 @6 L+ Z3 _Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 5 c" { [9 l( n d k; N; w H. O
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Z# i$ x, T( cTurn off shower.
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5 j" ` S0 c. g: u) Y0 p" W$ f3 u3 DSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. 2 p6 Y0 ?2 h: M. s5 b
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. . g0 x% m- \! b# ^4 _+ ]
6 J, o7 T2 L, ]. v" Z, r9 i% U3 ?" IWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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8 H1 r' p$ j$ Q& U3 |) dIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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7 E$ o" ~2 \) o/ `( _+ p ~HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 4 Q: p& h% ]$ q# T+ q: t0 e. L$ e( h
: P( @/ |! E" ]/ j- qWalk naked to the bathroom.) M. Z i8 N0 S$ e4 r. U, w
, ?3 m6 e, @6 G7 [: sIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ; e0 \) s" E: `* f4 f2 F, V4 I
5 a9 b, z, j/ K5 ~9 ~Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 7 \+ ^0 h) ~: N, T; j1 g
( } X6 I9 U2 G' a6 q/ nGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. ) u! [. S; t9 O2 r
/ D2 y) `6 {. ~4 ZBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. . J$ d* N3 f, p. q+ |) r
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. / _: g; W5 }6 R
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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9 Y3 e* Y" i* p- }Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 3 a1 V8 F+ Q" I5 a; X4 X
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. 6 j4 q* c3 h [% y% C
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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1 s! x* _+ ^" i8 NPartially dry off.
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+ v- x+ _5 l4 L! o0 Q/ Y, eFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. % k! G- q5 o4 d. F( X
- @3 i6 M1 [5 c% J8 u. D# u) m" KAdmire wiener size in mirror again. " q! ^ p4 E; e( B
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. # U* p$ S- U% U" C* i
5 Z: d" j- K* t7 W# FThrow wet towel on bed.
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, l1 C; T5 k. ~* M( ?+ }6 G: jIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
