 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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/ _; e. J1 ]$ r* rTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.! b% f" m: ?: G" ?/ A1 o5 ^5 ^- Q
7 a/ I% C! O. t! _! B( fWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. + r+ D2 g5 H2 t9 R+ K& ]
$ A2 R9 X r1 t! t% m; c: VIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 3 M4 T( X2 m: V0 S4 C8 ?
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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$ V7 J# O3 y: q4 N# {% e/ e0 lGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 2 O! T: r, O J6 |3 e4 v4 m8 A2 k
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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* f( {+ e4 H% D9 g6 c' kWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.) I, A9 L# m' H; X0 v" h& {
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..% z4 a2 E; y- ^
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 8 A" I; R5 V- B7 p# Q/ ]9 B' U
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 2 y, F5 t i! |6 F+ Q, c
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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2 z6 }$ S' B$ L7 j9 r: QShave armpits and legs.
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9 }- D! c+ S$ {/ {" _' U% o2 bTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. {- f& v0 I. n0 b" g7 d8 D
5 ]) w" p2 k, @Spray mold spots with Tilex. 7 u6 u% h! {. N0 w5 Z# w! x
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ' ]6 X+ [. M" Z. J9 F
9 }" ^$ }. w7 r: ^" u3 P7 d7 cWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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/ L3 @. t' I4 [7 ^' E: x- ?2 J0 R. FIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. / }0 [, ~! O! I
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 4 [% p- f F6 @( q/ D4 m
1 O6 X( _. U h' ATake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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/ e$ B* V, l# O; uWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. V" {. ~; V4 r& P2 q
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. + N5 \! W: B: x6 @
* e& J' B o' A7 rAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 3 E: F2 v- p0 [! v
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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$ x3 l( ^: W; y& I) A# Z% WBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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+ Z! J9 D9 d3 H; z$ ]Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. - N8 n% Y0 ~7 W0 ^
3 K: o9 R7 a3 R+ c( C0 Y0 ?Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ( i8 e4 a7 V$ y4 O
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) e. F3 w% |' t; j1 gRinse off and get out of shower. ) G$ J, }9 Y9 J2 D) Z# b
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Partially dry off.# f' A( p5 H# V$ W4 Y* g/ P$ D
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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& b) B/ S4 ~1 u) y b. }+ `( Q2 ^Admire wiener size in mirror again. ' E7 T8 ^: y9 D6 N
% n2 }. {8 K# dLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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) F: N- E: m* wReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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* X, O2 r2 n- E/ k8 `6 o- t5 F$ ?Throw wet towel on bed.
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; j7 X3 D) |) l8 jIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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