 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
9 a4 e5 Q6 E* X" Y3 L
I0 O1 O# s$ _( c
( b q3 r0 `& o+ _: c0 n: l9 s2 J) G--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
/ {: a: c$ _$ c* W8 G
8 v A5 p' y8 G2 \' l: `7 H% N
0 h& T. z- x! j/ Y* W7 _1 g - e1 P% V; ^9 }9 B9 T0 L4 W
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
1 f7 R; u9 I" R9 L# h; m8 }
) l' c; |# {# h* {" f" T# K/ xWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
0 S, R# F: {: @0 ^; w1 a9 B. O+ t: V4 X/ d! G4 m( M# G+ }) [8 {
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
& q. V3 e" S D% _0 [0 d9 f- Z) i% P5 _& T: z6 X2 x
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 5 E& U+ a# b& I
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.- }3 J- v! c1 F
- ?+ U1 L! p. l0 j5 A7 G/ |, BGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 3 @( ?) o; s' N$ O
: u8 ~7 G1 I. ?7 g$ \5 T+ \, lWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 1 z5 Y4 A3 Q5 K2 N7 h+ _
" }% F! v+ ^' I2 o
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
9 s: a' R; n7 k) Z* h2 E0 G' ]0 ]) \
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..! G0 w& R! t5 ~0 N
, G5 V2 C( H( I6 ^3 Y
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. $ y/ c( w6 Z( f" I
% y& r1 A% p1 O% w. m2 d. QWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
j4 U$ ]6 w6 T" N8 q2 J+ t* e9 g# J2 T- f! ~" H D
Rinse conditioner off hair.
( M) [* a2 Y* }. |/ m8 {( i5 ~! X, ]' @6 X
Shave armpits and legs.
) \8 w3 T. x' o/ p: v. w7 d& g7 |
, M6 r, x: E( Y+ u' pTurn off shower.. ?, K' a) d/ v" H. G
- E n! L+ d' j# Y; KSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
X- c5 c! F- t2 V# \0 _' K9 }# p# C8 e
Spray mold spots with Tilex. : p6 ?$ W5 x& e9 w
. o7 M6 Z( y& v5 yGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ) C" G- E$ c6 Z) R( K" T
6 f9 u8 B) n; o
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 7 C$ F* h# P5 \$ X6 k+ _6 o
9 }0 C& d, {- |" @; VReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
7 s0 K2 ]0 J$ H* m6 }7 S+ j v8 Y: h9 e$ c
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
' E* ~0 F% V! ^, D. U0 l7 I# e. {0 f* a- k" H
3 Y0 z6 A7 ]2 H) K- Y3 W6 qHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: - @. I- w. i3 r# F2 u
5 |" q. q+ T9 f) d9 STake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ! _9 m. S: M# h) a4 _; i3 r6 \
1 i2 n* V/ u1 j/ |, j+ N* w# i
Walk naked to the bathroom.
! @. I# Q+ p/ t% Q
$ q1 a2 O/ N. N$ qIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ( G/ @& E" O- B, W$ p0 b& h
. N& Y; o0 W3 p: h" q' {& V! T4 ALook at your manly physique in the mirror. , h7 t. k y2 Z4 t; B0 q9 H4 o, F/ {
) T- M: M, @5 [Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
7 R" n9 I5 t% z
& x% Z5 f N' j3 `7 e5 F. a' b! @, V9 fGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
2 T* m; h+ r( A! J! [* G0 i: l# [0 q0 v; f& a
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. * {( ^/ o5 R: f1 |0 P
1 P0 \4 b, C0 w5 YFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
- ]% w; E. B9 }# ^) O/ P0 u2 K
3 ?+ E5 T# X0 d) @; Q) |Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. ' n: ?2 ?0 b% `
" r8 `1 [* c- N0 u; A4 ~5 ^2 m
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
" u4 Z8 i2 |# @5 B+ u$ e" o# a" y: J; ]' O4 }9 i
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. : y; h9 J. }& E& R: ?3 C5 k
. h9 S; t9 s( n6 K9 `* |" FPee. / H( F2 y" ]. T
D5 g3 h( G% j4 J% cRinse off and get out of shower. 0 A6 i6 r- t8 h) U- A1 Q
3 _: t" Z/ F4 s- D2 @ s* Z
Partially dry off.
( l& \4 A: e0 p# ~: k& T/ H: Z. Y; Q2 N1 `) q
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. + ^. |7 M. J* y8 T4 G8 E
# w: h) ?* T% i( GAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
6 z, t6 d `9 B0 N
4 {, J1 N( s+ |: `) V: O. I; ~Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
v8 R+ @9 y% O! n+ h) @ B; e: {, U \4 E! ]
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
9 |% R) W' V! P0 {5 b; f t! q# l( A; L
Throw wet towel on bed. . c* j" z2 C0 V# N7 ]( S6 m
1 _8 ?- [! K% n4 X/ U- ?+ u! J" X
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
