 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : $ X9 e( r0 o4 E
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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" X! ]- ]4 B+ f% JWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. % Q3 i. h/ r% j9 \% m" f
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 2 j5 B- r) F1 @5 M3 a2 x
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.9 d3 n# n* l, B
2 g, \2 L% Q6 u8 b& F" \, hGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. . w+ } a' y/ X" F9 z+ d
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..' [ A0 H9 g( [+ l0 |. M/ s
4 C: [5 }1 [1 N P0 dWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 6 w$ p5 r% u2 ]& W$ I) G$ ?2 f3 \
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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" B5 v" X) Q4 sRinse conditioner off hair.0 @. N# A2 m. V2 Q! [
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Shave armpits and legs.! F! B" u) c) n6 S# b3 i: I
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Turn off shower.) s% s! b4 _6 C3 L6 u7 g& s
9 `) P0 H0 r1 [. V' y; kSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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L6 E! m E# Z( E) ZSpray mold spots with Tilex. ( F8 T# s. m! t! N
* H( M4 c$ q9 Q9 m6 I0 ?$ RGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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7 u: R$ V% t. m* m9 ?! x9 RWrap hair in super absorbent towel. C+ p w1 A: S) G" x- i
. r2 {: Q$ i% ^4 K5 p3 D' q }Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ' i* D) I; o/ G$ w& O2 @
8 P! W& |* r' K4 S5 qIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. + |$ q. k; _& L
. g# i( J0 }1 J3 h- q6 W$ CWalk naked to the bathroom., h' l# ]. l/ w1 I9 }9 g- |% @
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 5 |% ]% x$ K7 D- t# C. B
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. & s4 J; Y8 L. P/ I
% I8 b8 i7 B, J+ @3 j, |2 IAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. - l7 c0 C/ E* Y
* t9 g) i6 z1 Z0 pGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 2 T8 {9 C6 I6 @; D; R2 [1 o
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 4 ]0 A, W' Q# p0 [0 [- _% c
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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6 C! J- h) ?. f$ ^Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 6 r0 N+ W9 \( x9 ?* W3 A
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Rinse off and get out of shower. 4 }* s% Z! Y& g. {
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Partially dry off.4 k" I+ j- P7 _- _0 a9 T8 s2 _
q0 t1 j, p F7 P/ d7 U, z) [Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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3 P1 }/ h, s; Z& r/ E! I( TLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. / J8 t& ]- ?" ~5 w+ d. Y
# z: M' p9 T+ [Throw wet towel on bed. & Q2 s m' [+ |) D4 |7 K E
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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