 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
0 }( q; M- E4 M: D$ \" k* y2 I9 B( w2 W% [
/ x/ M1 Z6 _ T) S$ J! v- X
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------' z$ B0 E3 R( O: E7 q5 L# a
) E& L5 T2 @0 ?
/ f1 E$ V+ k1 h" |( s- r. x# d7 t
# C9 ~$ H7 z7 I! i" [ M5 W
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
5 @2 S O4 @* u7 l9 u- K% Q, n* X2 G' r9 u, p. O# o: e
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
- C3 ]4 i' e5 d6 r9 d3 p/ a& @8 s1 V: o3 }' i
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
% F/ U% |& y; w1 [6 `7 \" ^
" H2 F2 ?( w% J, _7 m7 c+ nLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 6 r& D7 e q# T3 W
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
0 @8 S: R+ G7 V m! @
2 J$ L' a4 b5 f5 H/ [Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ( Q. ~2 B5 m. @, V7 b# y% r! e
6 z! z1 P3 P$ J( k8 `- ~Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ) A2 q( c* C! K
# L. w6 B& y ?3 c+ N" T/ W
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.3 u- f- L# y+ d3 }) ^
, T3 S! k4 @, L4 L8 b3 Z4 p& G
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..0 K) j8 z" h# Z1 a
7 L$ F! o- J( @- ]
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 1 x: \4 v1 t) u8 y9 {2 l! c
: |2 d) s: D2 @8 gWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ( G) a& y0 g3 ?& ~9 q! j
1 D8 j3 ^( [' D5 P
Rinse conditioner off hair.
8 X- }/ w4 n& M. Z0 y) E+ ?' F8 }% A9 @/ h) i+ P5 c' z
Shave armpits and legs.
4 b: Q5 a+ m# }' N, ~8 E5 j! c; o
8 K. u0 C. Z8 W* U0 o) nTurn off shower.) g: T! d$ I4 n7 j, S
1 {% Y, }5 }1 f# lSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.7 @7 \% o- |0 Y1 m. q
, @1 C! v6 W* N; s5 S( ]# ]' sSpray mold spots with Tilex.
5 x' B/ o) g8 S! R0 B$ w& j# i3 Z2 U# a6 x5 Q
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
# ~ `! K& z$ k* o6 r( M( D1 R6 `( U4 [% i
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
( g/ J% F/ Q9 ~1 W$ @4 K9 B, M
6 `+ e# i% r) V( r/ nReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
: C; t$ n0 G2 R4 |, ]9 p; w; H5 L4 u$ \4 ~+ c
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3 Q- n6 V8 |8 _+ L' Q/ |
% t4 B& L; ~3 \ r+ R( F$ @3 R
$ U: L, z! m3 uHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
* e+ e) E1 l9 ]: V, }+ r( k. m4 b& d, d& _: ~. A
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
% B0 B3 U# x8 v+ H5 V
3 M$ N; V- {* H* L, t J4 wWalk naked to the bathroom.2 {. i6 E+ ~7 O' X( d; }
, _& w( | y: g# o9 {2 r& Z& Y8 BIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
6 N% B8 ~6 M! w9 O
) v! H4 N( x8 j! T+ h0 B7 r) x! QLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
1 r* s3 Q9 M5 T
4 b2 t" \7 I0 N2 h: t! KAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 9 @% u! f9 ~" i. y3 L' I7 n2 n
8 H; T$ y& k4 r P# q: O/ V; nGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
! s! h+ q: M" I9 J2 T% R
2 R7 F# Z& z6 c F4 N, M& R) wBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
/ f. V* y' ~8 U
) g7 M' i) w, yFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. - T+ `. e9 ~& `% s5 O4 ?
2 M$ Z' `/ w" @# r
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. - O3 b/ [: a' X, F/ `2 w
R/ k0 m# d1 X% u6 a; j& ?6 uWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 1 w6 _" `! Q) q4 a6 B: w+ A
4 K( P% p2 X& |5 x
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
o9 s( d; }* ]8 r9 O L+ K8 A
9 z% i% m2 a/ ^; ]9 VPee. - b6 c: w# A0 v7 n. }0 D
! X$ z, B! f9 U2 s8 R2 p) U6 ?
Rinse off and get out of shower.
) `( c, V0 Z3 C- p( A' O/ p4 J, g
+ `7 ~* }$ _; D# o- m( f8 QPartially dry off.
! m* h8 k9 I$ L: A* w+ b+ b% x
/ c% X5 e) O( D1 X6 Y7 W8 n( VFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. , @% D" y( r4 J7 `+ W
+ ~5 c+ {7 I; y/ Z* YAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
6 ?+ [8 Z6 D d$ ?9 x3 D( f" j1 |6 ]4 H: V% H
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
% M% `0 V3 k6 L; h0 M7 q- d( T# K1 d, L7 K! l j% O$ d; Q
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
$ R3 A3 x m& `" g. u
% t9 A% k) _6 J6 A7 P$ @9 L$ nThrow wet towel on bed. * S' y2 C, Q1 m5 g
; v# J3 }2 y- |: tIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
