 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ' X) A6 ?# }! q7 H! n$ N
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# E( ]5 @: q$ @4 }) q6 R; cTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.7 g- Z. v ?/ \4 G0 `0 S( D
; }7 o g0 E. Z& B% x9 LWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ) E( D3 I6 \8 W( [# I" b/ {
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.$ f2 K# Y, e* |, x) U" {8 D
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 8 T( j2 X' [; Q) x: J# w
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.9 G% C6 ]% w. t/ F+ a6 j
) e) c, i e# L v# J0 _9 oGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 3 S( h" K* }6 ?4 q: E
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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! j# j) w: E/ F' ^, hWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.. X2 g) n% X0 {" B
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..$ v1 ^$ E5 o6 e
. a! ~( @1 k+ j9 I. ]Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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7 H( F$ O m6 g: B2 WWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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) t w: n$ r& V: s& ?6 oRinse conditioner off hair.
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, t" J( H4 G; ^) F7 U' k' H: FShave armpits and legs.0 F- O. G; l5 z# j3 H
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.2 }' h0 D/ \0 c3 |0 _
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. , z6 n+ }6 {' P$ f' l
. a5 Y; e% _# L7 Q/ Q8 bGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 4 e: z6 @/ d5 l, i: ^
5 W P7 ~, z b1 p6 d. N) B$ ^3 JWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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3 a, N4 N) D" Q+ YReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 3 ^$ Q7 G2 |# S) C( x, B9 H
, W4 c; d4 A! FIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3 g" ~9 q4 D L1 F/ D& K
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& K2 E9 i3 c+ f) R& d! Z6 GHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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+ O6 ?- o8 X JWalk naked to the bathroom.) c( L. X! M6 T/ R/ W2 Y# e8 N& Z
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / \3 _0 i& [, t3 o7 R* |
/ i2 W' ]+ J n: h0 |9 iLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 6 p W( ^ H) z3 N: X
$ h4 B6 @. M, m5 u# o8 nAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. + k1 f0 \# M" k' O
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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8 a. I, [% q! I# B3 tFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. - S! z4 @' m# S$ B$ S6 [
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. X e- {, H( q( W
4 ]. _4 k1 p' v- ]7 e; \Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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5 M9 n% j/ l* P; O9 g, m# }) [Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 5 k3 E, z8 ^# ]# S: g9 U9 \9 M
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Pee. 3 b* _7 f) T8 D
0 B) \+ [$ s* |' I2 m4 uRinse off and get out of shower.
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: @- G/ j* x5 E% r; FPartially dry off.: U3 Z2 b0 }8 p
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 0 v5 @) P9 T: L( ?1 `7 Z# |
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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. M8 ~ s/ s7 z" A; PThrow wet towel on bed.
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( O3 u5 D- R; Q# B1 T2 S2 lIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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