 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.1 d9 J9 [2 Y/ o9 v4 z: C( R% ?6 I
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 2 C# h. {: n' i/ k
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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2 I) i6 {* ?$ j+ c1 J8 GLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
8 v7 C7 Y# h- d/ y. @( Q( `' tmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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7 l+ a& c, \+ ^- y* q |* WGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 9 [3 Y6 }0 Y1 M( h. c6 ?9 F5 ]
! A. X1 [$ c( H8 EWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.5 n4 S# H0 [! E2 t+ K# e
) N, X1 `8 Z: T6 K- g2 L; xCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 6 L. F/ B: m! s- s* _
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Rinse conditioner off hair.) ~. D# x2 z" f
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Shave armpits and legs.
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1 K# G7 a* Q9 HTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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& S% A2 U$ u. b" PSpray mold spots with Tilex. : V$ u2 y" _' w) _- _$ m
: p9 {8 S& r7 m2 l: A8 _& m2 RGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. * V5 |- j: W* V( U% w7 m
9 [7 J; s0 P4 r8 y9 h8 f( Y# Q* |Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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0 N! I5 x! l4 o9 bReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. # z6 \+ n+ t$ e$ F7 {( o/ ?( N0 a
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 3 L4 Y2 i& ^8 p! G. U+ c
! V: T% k7 l' E$ W! oWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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0 a% b3 X+ Z* e+ R. YLook at your manly physique in the mirror. % M! G6 r/ c2 S- C* e
$ V; g0 Z( B0 Z& q: A0 }Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. - L m5 k @+ x
: W) z, h$ s; tGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 0 _9 P! p. \* ~
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. / g' D( ]' | }* S
( D' M# ]9 @6 g5 Q F1 ^Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 0 h# \. k9 W0 ~* H. \
4 r" z. ~3 ~; {! T) n% J. hWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. , C/ ? P& [" Y' L2 v
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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, ~2 o4 `3 Q# N) U" vRinse off and get out of shower.
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, ?# ~# J$ p. }/ Y. B6 r, ^Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. ( I& l5 ]' v7 r/ o) `5 ^ r( ]
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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. r: u0 h4 Y- Q* \Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. 2 [: H% r& x" K. c2 l* C9 N
- _# W4 f- z" a! FIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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