 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.0 {4 y) [8 [7 ?4 ?2 C" r/ h
" P, G. E0 N( D& z0 i! F) eWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ; b+ d4 Y5 I: A5 W- H; c9 r
: z* q Z& e, N: D* g) xIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- # l, P1 E, N1 m( N1 `
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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' L/ I3 ~8 o; a; vGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 4 Y- \7 A$ Y: t2 e$ u9 R
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..8 L- C, ^9 s# Q- t6 |1 M
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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% Z4 K G2 E2 R0 ]1 oWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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+ W* s( }5 h- G2 w: }Shave armpits and legs.4 N6 }! d6 w% f. k! `% l% J( N+ C1 f
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. ' m2 X0 N3 i2 Q# g& d- }
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 0 b! h9 k6 z; ]; W4 _
+ J; h( b3 R' d) ?7 q3 LWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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- V; m5 @) s: s. W" ]Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 5 F# i% }' g; f" V
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: , ~# f: D; m- l" E9 d4 l6 S
. J7 v% h; V$ Z% K( s, JTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 4 `7 J- u5 p0 z: ]! @9 f8 r
( l# P1 t$ l& \1 u7 w- mWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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0 @) h6 |" K" C" [) p, `' s( ^Look at your manly physique in the mirror. $ w4 V2 R$ a2 u- @; J4 O
- P* \: g' I' ~2 \; \Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. $ d+ R3 L; Z3 ?! v1 i* {0 G
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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" l7 m& V* L2 V6 W- a9 ABlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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s" R9 ?) ^0 i- [8 A3 f$ \3 iFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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7 z0 r3 D+ y$ F8 I C; n: }Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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4 D! d6 R% ^4 y: hWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ; w8 p+ c6 U. v
' j' J- W8 G* W8 S+ v2 E; N4 H8 qWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 1 Z) h$ ~% Z' Q s
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Pee. 9 ]7 c- m M d: d' {
3 S8 o9 v& x9 E) P+ U" tRinse off and get out of shower.
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$ [( |, J4 B% n; ] WPartially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. - V- ~7 B( ~% g9 s6 P
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. " a, v M# ~. F! v0 s9 @( {
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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/ E6 g" Y- h& ]9 K4 pReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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9 ]6 e' ?! ~9 w* N3 K( J/ ?If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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