 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : - ]7 {0 U/ Y6 @, Y
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. $ |, ~! T1 s0 W2 \& p2 A* t! E
, z( U0 O! ?9 ~) y! ^1 N& G% HIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas./ P+ O* G3 C7 h! ]/ E+ i
5 p+ \) t8 a9 m, ~% k6 i& PLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- % o9 W# Z i% `; g1 ^6 F
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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% T) o, O' S5 p1 v+ MGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 9 ^2 V7 H1 r% T& k- z
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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( v+ J, h# F2 F; X, ?) q7 `" DWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 3 K/ k9 Y6 ]8 f( c! i
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 9 k+ F, h) S0 q
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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2 y' l/ ?# F* q% MTurn off shower.1 J, S; F: t B1 P% e
/ j6 x1 V6 E! Q6 _- ~0 DSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.: X7 m' @1 _* U' n/ a# E
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 0 B9 n9 N$ P# w! l
/ e: [, _5 R. T, r- ? rReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 4 [2 M; s9 U$ g g5 b; Q% O" S ^
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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: d* {8 Q/ t. x2 j% w: L& @HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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" p ? X/ ?* J5 ATake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.3 r0 Y2 P: N& U4 f& y* e
" g; P& v9 P4 J U3 KIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 3 I. U. ^& \ u4 Q0 C; j
5 ]1 P; @* p+ oLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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. v C" s" {* ? y: d' Y# s/ hBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. & R, y8 [9 M& a* R
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 9 R- d/ m9 C) B$ I3 Z. Q( p
: G* C; _0 p/ x" ~Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. + k) ^: Z' [4 t4 q+ v
: S( p3 D3 B8 L& SWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ' D' B) l2 D0 Z' M/ z
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Pee. 0 d' l* Z' Z: j P( \
* L/ Q2 R9 v! C1 f- c5 rRinse off and get out of shower. . H6 `" T; J1 n
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 7 I5 g2 d, i \0 F
/ A- X7 y3 T, q2 G( q4 K) E; TAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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( m* a5 a+ r" r& C' NReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. " N" a+ G. @ g2 B
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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