 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : * d. y) C- o+ [/ @3 j; `
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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0 T% _8 x H. H$ i5 H! {% nWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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* B5 ?& v* E6 [+ G2 TLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
* X' f' u$ Q7 V- ]make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.5 I2 w6 f6 {( F( y% b8 ^
$ P6 U1 d& n; K4 {3 l. B: t+ \3 f+ qGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 5 h$ y% k( B5 V
5 d, ? v- c+ d' G* @Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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8 e* U( Z. {* f. w/ _% b" y1 {" xWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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6 ^* N: ^, [$ G6 n) L% k: mWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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4 {; j9 E- E5 hWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair. R Y% {7 a5 Q$ h# U& `1 y
9 U+ x1 J4 S! a. z' f' B+ FShave armpits and legs.6 a& x( M5 |; t+ W
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Turn off shower.9 q" _9 p$ {: U- L
4 k8 e/ F* ?# OSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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" O( [7 G% h' w( F) _Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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+ L, ?. `, E0 {! w& L3 @ bGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 0 Q$ O+ @7 v8 Q" k
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 2 S1 z) o5 n. C/ v4 a) u5 y1 A9 C
8 |1 ~6 P! E& o3 Q' f0 cReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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# |1 d5 g4 n* f/ P$ q5 D) mIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 1 ?$ J9 ~9 [4 O/ ?5 ~# t
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* T& _; X5 _$ h$ AHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: * l4 H; \* P- h; F) g
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 7 C f- B( N- u' V* G3 A% K9 `
; Y0 i8 D; i6 o" d2 U# S0 ^5 eWalk naked to the bathroom.1 w/ i1 W7 Y$ J2 A+ r! ?
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. + u+ o9 [) U, L* U8 t
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. - E) g7 D3 I1 |2 n) d2 u0 G" K
/ N* ^9 \$ N, t# {4 P9 F2 BBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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) C! y F9 p; CFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 0 L* g4 o" b. k: ^, A* \0 x' r8 `: l
( @6 u, {( Z3 o: }2 K+ b( hSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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) M( e1 q% q$ `5 |Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 0 F7 q! |6 [. k$ ]. V
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 9 Z: C: ]: i# y3 W/ T, b3 V1 S8 p
& T; Y: D8 A5 E5 v {9 iPee. 7 {! ]0 i$ o( c0 v$ B2 w
4 p: C/ l& @/ a9 p# p& J7 b. `Rinse off and get out of shower. # t5 o3 Y. \ o- j; e/ n, @" N' p
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Partially dry off.6 t. ?9 O8 p; w# H( I
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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; I* C9 P0 {% l, R8 TAdmire wiener size in mirror again. * [% F$ [ `- N$ c7 D
4 W% ]' \5 U% p( ~. c" A' k& DLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. , D% d& p0 }: g v. q* O+ c
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ) W9 J1 b! P, u: N1 W+ r
% t! r, O/ b9 _8 c8 OThrow wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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