 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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( |3 X& @; U( B l. g; hTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.7 t% B: Q Z* A3 c: ^
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. & O- Z# y" z \( p1 \5 Y
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.$ A, ?( p; b. e' R
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- / P3 Q- e- {+ u% g6 V: q% i
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. - {2 h4 W1 ^8 e
, S g3 S, f+ T5 {! E- k) z8 bWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ) | D$ K% U5 B4 C; I
Q+ w* F$ I: IWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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) s4 t, w& d2 }* |Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..# i$ \- O5 W1 e/ ^7 a6 K. |
i5 E6 A: _) T5 |Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 0 i; z7 A, F* S
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.. D: n9 g9 T' Q- T$ g/ |3 z; U7 |
9 d$ k+ v5 }5 x0 {& m& vTurn off shower.9 W% |: |5 h" N# B5 b
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.9 q6 |, o/ e& N
. x1 s- n- i' i$ c- O9 Q2 Y# e% ySpray mold spots with Tilex. 7 F. |) ]# t# D/ l4 e3 ^
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. & p7 o% T, f4 `. f* @
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. " m6 F5 U/ d1 b& Q! @
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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7 O7 [. @9 j! m% S3 R! {8 f$ UIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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2 {0 b/ ^2 r2 oHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: & w( t: \" A4 z5 p# F. ~
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. - u+ L+ ~$ g$ R/ F
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. # `$ q1 N9 \/ L3 \8 [ Q
& v6 @# R! s2 Z' m& a/ |6 [Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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o' I. m4 F6 M$ P( [; CAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 7 p5 p9 S* \' D$ I4 N M8 h& T( ?$ f
# e3 O( Y4 Z/ K; H& p& h) ]4 {Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. ' T. y6 F- e6 E
3 h# e/ U- t/ Q- F5 \2 QBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 7 h0 r) l6 q `
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. - A' `1 K. O, Z$ r* O
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ' A1 e& _2 v% `, x( r8 a* k, P
: |2 t& P, h; t9 V$ m. R! QWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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$ o* ~8 H. s1 I pPee. 4 m5 ?. Q, i/ H+ j5 F: u$ Z/ Q
4 X+ C$ @! y% y, XRinse off and get out of shower. * D% o( z9 C+ }
" S/ Z) c7 F% Z2 b% B- }' T, LPartially dry off.: B# @; v1 i1 ~1 {
% z; n7 `* l! b/ W* f# T6 JFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. ' y1 M2 q# w5 h, ]/ w* d
+ f4 y( `1 Z4 p/ KAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. " {, ? y$ u7 T* ?+ {
' X. L7 y, W2 L* O. t |$ hReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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