 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : : ?; s& ]$ c* e% ?$ |
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6 O6 B1 s- r1 pTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.: W* ~7 X: V+ P" v, y
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. & b* m( K2 x9 A2 b+ g: }# j% u5 L
6 l8 _6 r5 ]& N; `6 O- |% z6 `' dIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.- i4 |( w8 I) T
3 {% o) R5 E" N) nLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- " [. R# D% @0 e6 E+ J3 `8 _) M! j0 Z
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc., Q7 B5 z6 a! H: J# h% r8 A# H
4 i( K" f; m7 U3 kGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 2 X5 Q' ~. O f, s6 n, X; B
q6 i: c6 g4 ~! s) [# ]* lWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 9 g2 ~) \' Q% M) J
7 r) Q2 u2 F- e8 X& x% L: YWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..0 r4 g* W- k! Z3 m/ ^
4 [7 K; m! S7 I) ] n2 _3 hWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. % o; L7 _. W( U6 ]! ~) L
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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# S8 i4 R7 A. U3 V2 R/ U. ERinse conditioner off hair.
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N: N* }2 g$ S( u2 Y- l& NShave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.3 ?0 t5 K' ^7 t
) b* g4 \% z& i' p, H4 p- x5 V2 W, NSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.: [: t; b2 h+ O6 i
; d! w$ U1 u1 \. j- ?8 OSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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* u, F$ G+ }( N; X. oGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. $ P C! s' m$ t3 o
3 w# g* m5 z. [0 T1 a, {2 UReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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: r/ p" }8 v2 u' aIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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" \1 T D. |4 ]' HTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.6 ~* K, x$ q' i* H
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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5 l! F @1 N4 X, F# E( W3 ^9 C3 sLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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4 e0 O# L( |* u1 d! W: ~Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. " o, C: d9 ]+ y A- f+ g5 ?( v
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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' @0 n5 s% P* M7 g4 u# [# MSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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+ a6 g7 W, C1 T0 }) @6 ~* aWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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* P* z9 [* k3 |6 yWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower. 6 e n! C' m; t
. p, z) T6 v/ c! {Partially dry off.0 H5 e/ V( e* b0 V* g& N
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. + d; P* A0 W0 Q
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. % S6 u) F& U' E7 D! M' y$ H, p
9 M! V. |; b* E- g# u* j0 vLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 3 x/ l, a5 o S: z8 C; O' ?7 m# g9 b
' l3 A/ \5 e. `$ W! Z+ Y# e# r! wReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. & u# N" a4 q+ a4 W5 M5 K+ ^
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
