 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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6 `& v! Y. m8 x6 ]. kWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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7 C6 {, B2 J3 h! x3 p: ?/ bIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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' ]- k0 G: ]- z* T0 ]6 p. v, WLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
- |9 q) V& ?8 [9 L6 s& ?! n( P& smake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ' _# K/ a0 A* q4 R# Q
4 \8 k, _4 [ I# rWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 3 U9 ^& C' m: n
6 g" ^7 E$ v! OWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.! d$ P8 h, H, U5 ?3 D0 ~
1 E3 d/ [# k& }8 T0 c# Z1 ]Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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2 G6 D y9 A/ i9 g0 s- t5 wWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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! D4 {0 b: \* ~Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. / y# U3 Y6 \6 k h) w! l: b
4 f0 Y: L* a9 yRinse conditioner off hair.
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3 Q. v s& v' x) n, t- hShave armpits and legs.
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0 w5 a* T. A% [& K }. ]1 r& o: MTurn off shower.
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! R! {) o) H* Y- DSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.0 S1 ^8 t5 d4 i: b7 x' [( ^" d
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. 0 t+ {4 b) T) ?) |
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. & u; w' A$ F, _- \4 {$ b( U: ^
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 2 i5 a9 F6 D4 W* C5 X. G
4 |- N' R0 Z% z& O! |1 [5 O3 hReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 2 K2 p j) {# X0 r& d
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 8 L( F4 g5 g {$ W* M1 _& ?
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5 P% W+ Q5 _8 [# sHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: - T3 L( ]" o! Z# k i: N Z$ I
1 \, A3 ?3 O# C: MTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ; ~% \0 _- X+ |, |4 E, L, j( b. e
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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$ i/ @* B! T! ^3 A' J* DIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 5 S0 ?: A" O, m% m
0 R& J: X8 v* h! OAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. + i2 g" T# ^! N; ?8 D
9 B. Q2 v" A& n0 UGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 8 H" A/ a+ @6 I8 g$ [, b* P
l0 J" a& D2 U+ D9 SBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ' b2 N- `* ]- D9 I
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 0 A/ \8 w6 Q' w% N' `( f
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 9 i) s% m* o: ?; t( R
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Pee. ( C* C6 a7 V. P1 @5 }8 D
& F# y \2 ?2 k; s' a( mRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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; A* S9 W/ j$ p: h/ X" g8 F0 _Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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9 \( s- o- ^* p) r H5 mAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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# A: v$ l1 m, k, Z2 A" {; LLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. : N! h0 L' {4 B# k" V( U
, S+ v+ j* ?' V, b; h% q2 ^Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. 6 D3 H0 n9 e l
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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