 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. / u* K1 }( z6 t1 C$ V# k: m, O6 W) [
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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3 J) Q, K( W# A7 J6 WLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
1 p5 l ?& o3 kmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.& q7 z8 H8 k' Z8 l8 B/ a, l
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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! J; g1 t% ~! W* yWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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+ c3 b! D) D" L9 ]1 i! V8 FWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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# n7 Q# |1 {& aCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..0 ]5 J5 B, y, ?
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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. {; _" R" f) `$ Q& `5 ~! l( vWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ' S1 d9 }; A* ^5 e8 W. y! W
1 f: D+ D4 a' ^9 _Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.0 Q4 x; Z. |8 q0 S% S, P
* I' O2 K+ C0 ]- z2 jTurn off shower.; D# V) z2 z: }) N
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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, e _7 r# f3 M0 |/ |' iSpray mold spots with Tilex. * x' z7 z: _! ?6 }3 @& M
6 u, m: H6 ]- {- X1 B+ YGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ! S* C3 U! B2 |7 O
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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; W% E3 `, v% o$ g& e+ jReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. + Y. ^! W5 e' F$ q' k
% m7 F, @& c$ z4 |6 e6 ^5 KIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. , S8 l% A$ S7 D9 c w6 U# t
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5 ?" n! ~% b5 U0 Z# a2 tHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ' U0 E; z; ?' \0 f0 E% ]% V4 W8 z
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / ?# s! o) P; P* D6 W" m
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 5 ?' T9 o% D, g2 t4 ?0 |4 U' V
9 w9 b0 i: `# D, A5 e" ZFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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8 F5 a. @+ t7 |; P) w) tSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. & |) Q3 s4 \6 A8 I
! G* h8 W8 h7 T5 O+ U+ wWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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: `0 C1 [( |5 G9 `. Z: e mFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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8 {- b K2 W- m- _7 u& pAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. : `5 Y' C& U/ n" x7 S9 R+ f
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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0 h9 @+ c& p# `2 lThrow wet towel on bed. ( z# ^( l! B/ } c
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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