 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
2 x$ p2 ^! W1 E( z$ F4 i
, m) j; ~, T# C" W2 J# B
7 v# Y7 T) `$ `5 y. F. Q+ L0 e--------------------------------------------------------------------------------- x% H( _7 v( ?* ]7 [. w) o/ s
5 v9 \( k+ `7 q( u8 K9 A$ d
( |8 D. x9 K- N o, s; G
* l0 t8 U( j! Y/ D ~4 vTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
& B3 B: v" E1 Y0 |
D9 W/ `. G. XWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. % P3 U( v* n" u6 G
- m# F* w2 P, uIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.3 D4 \# g4 ?6 V/ D w8 W2 n
7 o4 r7 q8 {. H/ D9 |1 r2 BLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
' {* g; E, q {: K# n1 f7 Nmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
! |) k- p, V9 c% [
- [0 C; t9 k+ ?% S. M/ eGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. - [2 \* ~( ]+ ]3 K. B
" \; ?- O r0 qWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. , D/ Q0 @/ F: q" \ \; Y+ m/ K( W
2 S0 W" d$ k) ?8 BWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
5 k6 N3 J( ?) ~' n
7 @. W+ {4 f: h: v; vCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..3 _- h$ ]0 B+ y
' `9 w; e. K5 `" a, \/ W' X G
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
# \ _# u3 t" z1 T" n0 d) r" W0 ^! y# U
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. : B' ]5 k: W7 j
3 ?2 ?' f# O; J) m; Z( ?Rinse conditioner off hair. b- A' I# w1 Z( u) b7 O- X3 e
7 q. u/ k% S" c
Shave armpits and legs.
r- j/ A. d! e7 `4 z/ {, k
* e- j* L& e8 G+ |( `+ W* [Turn off shower.
- M3 f ~8 R- P( E- t
6 [* l' L& y- d( P5 E0 y+ hSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.; E4 b/ ?! s2 N- {) O' g: k
; g+ l: `8 R. A1 n: l3 U+ VSpray mold spots with Tilex.
$ d1 t" U6 v& H( B+ C( Q
, M" s4 r5 |7 p; QGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
' n$ ]) W v2 V* m6 Z1 X3 m0 s W1 J; \0 F- t' J
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
' ~7 f9 [% Q* w6 P& k
E7 b3 b8 b) `* [) D% l% G( O% oReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
! u, g) ^9 K6 G3 i
* O" }' u1 U8 j8 S' p5 YIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3 g; b. _1 ]% j E
8 E( |0 W' b5 T( ?9 n! ?/ Q# a
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
. ]9 r4 g5 c4 H' L. Z+ L7 ?" b- T4 L7 v5 P
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
5 M6 F* @# A: d$ e3 [( _- k) v0 X3 M d- | F# T" s1 l
Walk naked to the bathroom.
5 X3 o9 z8 A8 j' T% C" ~& D- i' }+ }
' _. H, i: O3 B0 z) S7 GIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 9 e/ u% L) ?# s
$ L2 T6 [7 Q3 @1 |9 b: H/ B
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
. d" [! s+ j `' |9 B# u/ s; m) B! `/ `
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
6 ?3 z, N8 b' c n9 F- v) z; t1 F
2 ~- ^- D8 k+ s; tGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. % l+ U' R& M& s$ O }3 R" {
; @' c2 e4 v( S' T; s/ P I) y
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 7 d# M& w$ q' S6 K! @# _
9 q. m1 n( g% N2 s/ _: i) d
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
5 ?1 _5 y# u6 Q( B8 a/ [2 z6 Z2 k9 H, n6 q! I; C
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
/ O6 R# i! P# E3 y5 \' R, D0 \ c$ r( p
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
. c+ @" H3 g# i+ X+ h& m' @- y. {' b/ Z
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
. v, e6 G- m9 W1 L' J
+ O$ Y) E/ e$ e/ ~Pee.
/ z. E- B' Z: U* y8 T: P5 n- q2 F) ?9 |$ T8 e- S
Rinse off and get out of shower.
( v& e6 H/ ~* k0 r( A2 v$ H, n" v5 N
4 O* x% D. x+ ?' ~3 h$ yPartially dry off.; M, ~( |5 Z% Y- K
2 Y3 Q6 E! ]9 d) nFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
$ [" h) s& I* |, R4 a6 c3 b! L% p! d6 ~
; ~# c" O) T+ M8 L) VAdmire wiener size in mirror again. ) ?5 U) N0 \$ A6 I7 _. I
# W2 @* K+ r% J$ @; t( ]) q. yLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
; v% ]& y2 {% }' A. _3 M" B
3 @8 a3 F) n+ y) VReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 5 s5 Y1 ?6 f! C2 T& Z h9 }# I, O
d) N+ u% V& \3 cThrow wet towel on bed.
5 l0 A4 t# Q. V: T e& [
+ M* |6 k6 F4 s8 hIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
