 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.& o9 d' ?* R. }& M, _4 F" F
0 k" X2 o- z b( ]. l( I6 A% Q3 C# BWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 0 ]' P' t: b- A. {+ y; X) x/ X
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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9 C7 |. Y( m9 i: {0 |8 XLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
( o" }; h' m5 b9 g& {7 i8 g3 imake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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9 @* D8 B) v* w9 {. eWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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6 |; l5 b! Y( @Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.% d# t0 Y* }% F
+ I- @; d0 E" B& Q& C% CShave armpits and legs.
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/ ]$ n# m$ |2 p/ F: vTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 7 v! t# r: A' F- ~
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. # g8 V2 x4 A" U. V
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. # Y* O, y" ~" F: D8 f U
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 7 _" p# j# t4 R. D" C# z! i
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Walk naked to the bathroom.( \3 z; k3 o9 V# Y3 t9 R4 g
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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8 m; }0 {# u- m# s. \" QLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 1 v) {: Y/ Z' E4 A+ E' w
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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; l" \+ @# y0 `' `; E2 sGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. # i% i# F0 j" E6 B |! t, y
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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3 M+ L. f2 d( n, N8 z5 b- e7 Y: {Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 3 L% T2 {" Q7 C* p: X( ?
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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" ~0 m3 s9 m6 S, x7 YWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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! C. \, U2 ~. v2 y2 E+ |Partially dry off.; |1 R& p5 K% ~* _3 j/ K% d
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. & o1 ~% {8 X1 V, S6 Z
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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- Y- u% m. ?8 K# t; F# [$ vLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 8 ~) v! D, `' d" r7 N0 Q+ O
* V* T6 u `- w" h. T5 W; O, rReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ) T4 \& l7 }5 R( L* X
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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E2 J5 {, R9 \3 d7 {, HIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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