 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 5 f+ s9 ]1 t& U, u
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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4 G: f: s6 @0 r- sWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 4 w- p. k# G6 _1 ^
/ v7 e. u n7 P1 H# IIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.) R B: d- T5 M+ Z& |
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ' ]7 d3 z# R+ M* x; X
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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/ `0 C. p* _9 G2 Q/ S2 R4 f% nGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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% T) B+ _" D+ }& @. }4 n- j9 t. VWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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! v6 I1 h( E6 j8 b B( _Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.3 i/ ^: e+ ^" I' r1 `
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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" P7 _( N g0 ? R+ ZWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ( J x( `' _* x
3 l: Z2 L& J2 @# [: WWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ! X# p; J4 ~' `8 P, W2 G4 q
; h% W( @$ b. z: ]9 e R8 ^Rinse conditioner off hair.6 s5 l. O; `) [8 D9 \4 i
. }; y" y9 ~4 c N5 kShave armpits and legs.5 G7 B* L( ]9 V: b# J. ?
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Turn off shower.4 U( e+ l; ^$ X$ `9 p& E4 P9 }
( R. [' z( b# D u/ WSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.3 ?# y: p$ e# T1 N/ T
2 u: I: u* z4 |( H, a9 hSpray mold spots with Tilex. 0 _3 Y% I/ a. d- k
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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1 _/ I8 a2 f% [: B4 M9 VReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. % G P: U6 w! T+ w* D
" e' n4 C3 H0 p. L" H7 UIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. & y( A' L" U+ e; p4 \, O
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: / |; C. }4 R1 Z" i2 r
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ' E2 o& V& @5 y
6 V% d1 L2 h% x8 SWalk naked to the bathroom.
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- Q0 L7 r- t ZIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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, ^6 f5 ~8 w0 d* _/ OLook at your manly physique in the mirror. - c [8 F8 T Y I
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. " y; Q0 T; M1 _3 R/ e) r3 P6 R
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. & y0 A5 a! e7 Y6 `. E
# W% C: Q2 p5 e$ G& U+ NFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 8 f9 P. g0 [5 ^/ h# _' N4 e) H4 v
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 3 ]3 a' N7 j& @ p( @! _" \% `
3 C# w- n3 W# f2 e1 s7 o: OWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. & ?9 j8 s) K& ?1 X
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. ; H- \' q' d6 o+ X, f
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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5 Q+ x( ^" m" |7 \ {Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 6 T( Z/ s5 ^" H$ m
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 3 P9 b9 |: s, d
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 1 s/ R U3 W p
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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