 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 7 F! y+ I2 E. P) o
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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# g, u6 P4 B& ?6 E2 sWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. . w8 D: F- `% g% g2 m
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
3 g2 |8 n) r& `' B2 Mmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.4 R3 v( N) r! u# o+ y" A3 n
# s7 M& v' c- sGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ?: a/ O% S/ Q! O4 q1 ~
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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$ v! I7 ^9 x! p( c p1 @* LWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.9 d. F) r2 X7 r3 |5 w
( Z3 @4 U& E: d0 J; |Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..& O6 x- X1 \' ]; S8 E) Z" U
, ?7 K. C8 \* l) C+ [$ S( `( aWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. " Z; c/ o, M* \# @6 W6 k4 x
: ^) a. T( W/ AWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. " k( r6 Q2 Q* C4 v
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Rinse conditioner off hair.8 ~6 |" j3 `: X/ s' a5 Q6 m3 H7 C% m* |
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Shave armpits and legs.1 Z9 r( d7 H- ^& m7 s
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. - i b6 a" s1 I' p* w; Z
5 d) \ g+ I% N: g9 i6 d6 U7 SGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ; J' e2 A" A2 e3 F5 C5 Z( [9 X
B- G4 H1 {+ A( x+ V7 gWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. , v6 S% ^$ L: W
9 p) j5 o2 o3 [ E. M/ sIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. " \6 a' x7 b5 Y6 T5 T' H8 E9 C
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Walk naked to the bathroom.& f: t$ `4 v7 I& T5 l2 V9 c
1 ^6 ?+ z2 Q# I! \; s% i$ tIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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" ^8 k, j$ S/ b$ g* w7 RAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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, B( b2 M2 h2 s4 k( gGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. , A, \. H- t+ b- l' }+ S6 H
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ' f. _$ n: }9 M8 l9 I
* P* P, W) y3 I# W& F9 Y/ ~Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 3 e, B; e% d; t% k- k2 K
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. + w+ F4 T# Y$ \. C k3 M
& W8 M5 R0 h$ ]0 O5 qWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 1 G& E0 c2 f& J! V% c3 t7 q) M
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Pee.
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6 a% ?4 Z5 w' fRinse off and get out of shower.
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; i4 ~6 A7 \2 a5 u# QPartially dry off. e$ N! S8 D8 O+ |/ g1 C
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 2 x4 T3 b& ?' n" P) n
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. 4 W7 K) @" O+ e2 }) V
! ?. ?! [ @/ M3 P& X* ELeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 5 E }; R* L3 O5 t9 I6 S
" O8 e. e, _, [* C) s/ \$ }# o9 V' ^Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. ) h1 z; x9 c& H$ S0 J
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
