 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ; V6 Z( h H9 R$ w% z
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& {' C% X V! N' yTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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& {' ~- F+ `4 h% Z9 N0 @If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- $ X) s# {+ I5 ?
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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, J" @0 c9 T! n; OGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. & K& K2 K+ G4 t2 `' z# M! ~
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ) W8 O1 F6 s) Q3 |8 e( f
! W& v$ S/ L1 p9 b6 `$ mWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.5 B; s; u5 q# ?
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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k7 \* f+ V7 E" ]; JWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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) D% t: ~+ ?* B+ u: o5 B, @Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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* i/ B% ?1 i/ ^$ M( T: ^, HRinse conditioner off hair.
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8 f# ~0 i) f1 N# PShave armpits and legs.
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, C0 i5 M; h+ Z) f, @$ ~( M# G0 GTurn off shower.
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1 L, F) f+ J: o# T$ U7 oSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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8 e5 i# p4 n/ M' LSpray mold spots with Tilex. . |( W* ?! F& t3 d/ P! Q
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. - T. u' d# t8 V4 m. K) ~
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2 w* W- f9 v4 O7 IHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: % y6 @2 f6 f% P6 T
* i) Z `# R- H% E7 E. M- CTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ) L& D& g0 p/ J v$ E5 Y4 O- y
- Y; ~& z$ Y" g" I8 CWalk naked to the bathroom.
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# ~2 p$ T- \% M) hIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 5 ^5 V3 m# f6 U1 N, M0 L3 c
7 T( f( U! l& v( a) L% g1 lLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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5 r( w* Y. K! S/ cAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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$ l3 T3 s0 T7 x( x9 V- nGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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% G' b/ t) f7 }* _) [( N$ ~, W% _( HBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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, [( y* A) k3 d/ I% }) d# XFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 2 W7 D6 |6 P3 E3 T
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.2 e0 q7 N; e8 p* Z! h
( M' w) D0 w% p- L4 h8 o+ j9 ZFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. / q* ^: ` @: k$ Y0 `
& N9 a1 x/ P, i3 j( Z/ u* uAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 0 M; t4 H. |( N3 o4 ~" x6 a ?
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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7 A) k2 M9 h( r: t! M7 {Throw wet towel on bed. 1 u1 r7 M1 m1 H
5 }6 N! ]; l; u# y1 y2 d( @If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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