 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 2 C% v; o. Q! x
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.: P; v) D k" u2 \5 |
. @: j( Z* w! B) l8 N$ i# y7 Q# gWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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+ V5 Q* b, K$ g3 |1 `9 E+ mLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
" m( K5 _5 C7 `make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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4 i/ ` b& O: I* ^# [Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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: x/ n4 Q* {( w7 f5 BWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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+ C' }! d" B/ lWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. , `3 Z! J# h( z
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Rinse conditioner off hair.- b7 a: X# Q) V, e
3 f' F$ \' _7 FShave armpits and legs.& b6 r; a) q4 B0 H6 ~7 O
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Turn off shower.
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$ Z+ a T4 M0 b$ f$ V+ ~5 g; M0 VSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.( N4 {- e' x0 a) P# R: T {- @
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. . m4 C1 T% a9 E/ w! ]% D( W5 }# s
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ' E1 T; y5 k# E$ c
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 2 h1 v$ d: B8 ~) b) M! u$ U& v
3 r( B3 O) D# u$ o' V* {Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ' y8 H, ?2 X6 s5 m* X
, C. B# p% `0 |, s2 z: z/ V& lIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. % [! `1 Y# e: g$ V
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 9 l6 |# ]" O* G* [
# f' y! O" H" h9 mTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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. L4 W3 T3 q) N. W# _" QWalk naked to the bathroom.1 A& G3 {+ R0 o5 S# R! d
: G8 F$ A% f ]7 g) N1 F: m, q9 XIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 5 c( Y: l' |. K' Q! |: v) d
; p( x1 G( Y. h, \( W% ^Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 9 {7 k% o6 u; M4 n- B, l, r
8 x2 C. A7 a, h4 i" [, Q7 F6 `Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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1 K D- L0 T! B# EBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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& I$ z) T. i% f m+ d, TFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 2 |( C, U5 Q; I. c2 z! F0 L' {
* W e* V2 |- [, uSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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0 l. Y5 I* E; q. O7 W6 [% s1 yWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. - f. L! `% q9 ~$ A5 \9 ]7 ?( ~; U
. O+ [- B6 q- n: qPee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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# D# A( V0 B+ E, D# t5 F+ F5 NPartially dry off.$ c" E* L5 W. Y' Z
* t$ Q5 y- R$ `, K- n$ |& DFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. / q) l- m" t0 M
2 |% {6 b$ ~! Y H( W' @: O- l$ dLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ( m- T; _, W, X+ m
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Throw wet towel on bed. 0 X- B7 z" f d# H
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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