 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ) o9 _+ m2 \8 b* S: G g1 @$ |
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.2 }& d% B( `! o6 D. K7 I+ P
& N" o6 t, a3 D% Z; q& m/ G4 I1 VWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. . ~! D6 \0 O9 o; {
' J @2 w- I# U- K4 VIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
+ ^! I2 ^. B5 I( Y; ^7 wmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 7 i+ X4 M$ U: w2 p, C5 t
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..# z( q9 s4 q# w" h
1 l& ?+ _* z% A, {% z2 d# xWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.; z0 {# s0 X# b9 V. q
/ M+ W+ m% Z- ?$ B5 }Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.8 l' g& _! N0 ]' a8 N1 W
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. # u2 L$ Z9 V/ D! _! t( B9 ~
4 o/ ^0 a6 Y( z. y$ _( jWrap hair in super absorbent towel. ! \: r( W( H/ s7 P$ f8 |6 I( q9 T
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 5 D- F$ m3 @1 |3 b) d! O3 x
5 b3 J% T. E6 p: p: wIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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9 p8 ]+ @, L( a& @/ RHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. + I% z& o7 K# k2 x, f9 m. Z" V- I
O, @! \5 X7 x- |. hWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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8 \1 m; _4 D- U ^$ X, eLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. & q1 ^4 J; K8 b2 C' h; _' Y. z2 ~* N
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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+ `: U* f! {( A/ GFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. * N- k0 u6 Y$ h1 X8 R7 v& ?
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. $ d. M0 S9 d' S7 v. [" Y
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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# Q5 u/ \; H$ n4 ~, J9 P( EWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 9 ~8 c, D( q s8 K8 h
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Pee. % s% m% \8 t! T( t$ @
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Rinse off and get out of shower. " `& m7 _- K2 z- x$ R
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Partially dry off.- V+ |0 e4 s1 Z% O& e% e: B) s1 x0 x, N
4 Y Q, g3 O3 W7 Z1 z6 r; E" TFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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! M" {$ H( s, O5 ~6 e+ kAdmire wiener size in mirror again. $ ^% F# _9 @! \" P& i& {
0 C, _& T3 a6 I1 p; s [& ]Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. . G1 [: s7 Q2 s/ L* B# \5 x/ l
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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! k" r, j9 V" M. M: V( y7 cThrow wet towel on bed. + X6 n, H( q4 Q( X# T1 {7 e
, r5 T. v* R' z5 TIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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