 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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9 z$ x: w2 k7 C& l1 W+ ^--------------------------------------------------------------------------------( \. s/ ?& `) Y; Q9 w2 G4 \. ~
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4 l& O9 _4 k- e9 ]/ yTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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, @ _4 r9 q% w; VLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
2 h* x6 w& t* v" l# H# G' jmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.- ^: a& m: `8 A, n0 u0 `: |2 m, h' X% g
; y8 b4 j w- S C# u: NGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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% ~( R( J7 A# h4 f4 \Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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5 }- b6 f3 R, g3 [1 o3 VWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..# B# v' @' f! K7 B
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 7 \2 j- p& K8 ~( L; C
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. : l( A4 b: [: u3 K7 A c' ^
+ H; o7 n2 i) C+ nRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs., S% G; o3 I* I7 k
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Turn off shower.
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% _9 `9 Z* {, b6 Y/ z; Y3 eSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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( V8 I5 J# T$ u- g! }Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 4 N0 ~) M; y0 @& P
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.0 T& j0 Q+ ]( y
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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2 [; k0 N5 V( FLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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! |( o, r, ^4 KAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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v+ a; {& I" A# {Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 4 D0 \1 U+ W4 t
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. . v/ q; `% b7 |# ^
6 c9 w/ Q7 z8 L1 [Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 7 B0 z% _0 o0 O% @
! p6 ?8 l; `1 t \' ESpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 5 `- S! @- s- l
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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( ?7 }6 f. u% E4 w0 d T; kWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. # w% k9 W1 ]1 `
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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/ M o `9 l3 J& ^Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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# ]" P% U& |+ T2 ?4 w1 pLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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% P0 K8 L* m3 ?( `1 P2 xReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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. T$ H$ q4 u/ h1 @3 }+ xThrow wet towel on bed.
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! w( F+ L3 y& k& Q6 Y2 I0 cIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
