 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.$ W: j O; P" P7 q2 }# y) R9 o, n
. Q$ e& _5 E5 |Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. . |) p. S7 O& T. k
, a" \+ o+ t, z( D: m, F6 pIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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: }+ N6 A7 v) Y u- KLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
+ k2 m! n: l, L( [- tmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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' I6 `$ w- @% V6 V7 _* pGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 7 S8 u% P3 N) [* W4 Q* o
5 Q" n7 T; V+ ^; wWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 2 m5 M; H2 x3 d* K
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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: ?& T3 T; U, X0 j6 zCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..9 l/ E+ [# B" V
, h! w- ~6 j) vWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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" y l8 M) D' j6 t. w' ]: TWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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2 h9 s! r+ B( r+ m$ ]; _4 vRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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6 }2 z$ U, K5 x8 J$ OSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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4 _8 X1 k/ _1 E2 qSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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# i6 Y& C/ b+ XGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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( e# R" `: z& f/ n* f9 LReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. " R/ R! l, ]/ u# t" t- P. x
" A- |1 y" [( v( ^If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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( ], \) r& R; h/ H( CTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. $ l5 r5 B6 Q3 F3 a/ w+ T
) \* u3 G) G( d( f6 b2 }Walk naked to the bathroom.
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. s4 W P4 {1 ]' h" o; r/ @If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ' ?8 W. j! I5 p# \
6 W1 d( }4 x7 B- I XLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 1 f( A( A$ d7 L b5 X8 }+ `/ B; q
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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$ J. |( A. o7 X) VGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. x2 X) h2 z% P/ l w
4 @% c: K9 B3 b% fBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. , s3 I: A- v: K2 \$ T
3 r" F$ T) W+ JFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 0 ^+ Y. R& j- `1 o5 |+ P2 z
5 M& d: o% P |6 S* F9 FWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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n: g5 n( d4 V+ y5 \1 QWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.! n. l- |" S3 B
1 S' U& F7 \1 }. N5 g% a0 d( FFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. * Y* x6 N2 z, R
2 ~* T* S( a9 l8 X$ SAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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1 c7 H$ @3 {8 j( u" mLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. & N7 o1 j0 \) ]$ }7 S
X/ w3 `; R! M' C) ^' \% X; }Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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$ a7 S+ }% X4 ^! I! pThrow wet towel on bed. % {/ S5 Y; I; B
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
