 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 3 O' Z. w2 {/ a: j
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; b/ @) q J$ d9 z; l! STake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.6 b1 v" a, s4 S
9 m! G' j7 l" c! `' l: F6 HWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 1 A9 N X4 M5 }7 U
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.8 l4 [! ^) T- y
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- . z5 p* N' J: K4 g0 q0 g9 j
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.# I; r4 h& D2 e) h
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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8 u+ n4 m& c2 L x, KWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. : n4 }/ |$ q# C% W, o: i
; p7 M$ W1 B, @8 `( Q+ A% tWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ( x- z5 G5 }" w% S! e. o% P* _7 [
- e- N8 L2 V SWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.! l o$ j, F" o: Y
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower." W- w6 x( ^+ I, l! Z+ p3 N
7 j( {+ M* @% a, tSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower. c/ Y- b: R$ q
: l; d1 O X" E# W% HSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. * ]6 X( k$ }( e, Y( c1 g
7 c* P* b0 W3 N* ~Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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, Z, [# W/ U8 _If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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. `$ B& P" [6 ?! x, S* {& z3 KHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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8 y* ]3 ?* F- \) A$ m& ]Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 9 e0 E9 \/ w& w# }( r* |) m0 C
( c2 } K3 k2 BWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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4 J& [1 y9 `: e* x! l; ELook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. ; I+ \4 E0 Z2 O. L% {' ~% q- [4 y3 G
1 g5 V$ w# Y. o2 s! DGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. $ k) \/ W4 z. [& L* Z& ^
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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' v. n) v0 D; y- v f3 UFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 8 D8 {) w5 E2 t7 }
?# }* M# F) B ~* vWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. . [1 [2 m0 Z; { u
. s' X' E* p2 t2 u# yWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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! d% R7 P1 F: H" ]3 Y0 e$ FRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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; L) Q3 ]# \' x1 H' S1 x9 r+ YFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. # l6 `8 x2 X. S
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. ' o$ k! Z% N- O4 N
# \& E4 `; y/ t/ ~( A j+ ~Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 1 G1 X' `* P1 Z6 |9 n8 u6 m$ [
- p# Z* s# e* t/ m3 H) YThrow wet towel on bed. ! q6 r4 z4 k/ _; C6 f u! H
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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