 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 1 E- N& x2 X. U+ J$ h9 Y5 b
. W2 }% m- j9 o( y+ K' H
) w: G5 h" U- F* e# M
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4 z; m" J' U( J Z5 g
( I. T* `0 Y# l
- R& d" a/ [& y
b3 y6 a( s- R$ x, ?$ |Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
3 ?. h8 O( p% v% h' T5 I9 L
/ P% Q; Y% z0 K8 E) L( O2 YWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
8 p6 U6 |4 {4 Z8 ]- L1 |3 ~3 K3 M9 F3 }: T; V, i* ?/ C5 z# V" w: F
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
x& ]6 m! T4 r; n2 l. M
( r0 o3 ]2 `0 ?) C+ _4 c' ULook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ! }" \* `: u5 W9 ] }# E
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.( R. h) e2 q9 }! T! I0 n4 d
+ g1 n3 M/ X# c4 Z3 x% _, ?
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
8 r# F& e: q; ?2 G( j/ Z5 c' k+ ?' |. y4 |* `' B" T1 z
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. & j& k: G6 O- {# E
" _- B8 n5 Q7 k6 r6 x1 l9 u2 @
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
3 K# e+ E/ p' v2 T" W4 d8 t1 b P/ ^- N T# }7 \# J1 w
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
. H0 h9 m/ `2 m( v- r e, N3 c7 l1 _7 z. O$ q G
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
$ [% J. z- m0 u% q
2 e# [. f+ v% U P; SWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. + X2 K8 ?, y @4 P( H5 I
2 B9 X1 ]% Q" k7 x; C6 ~Rinse conditioner off hair.5 k. Z/ U6 q! R$ E3 L. u4 |
4 ?" x; b. \. V1 @* p) O
Shave armpits and legs.
2 R3 d) Q+ M$ |9 Y) d
- p1 c$ F' g d4 K2 t2 _9 n0 r5 a: S; zTurn off shower.
& C4 H$ Z0 Y5 z
& q( _+ O N7 @8 mSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
* X+ ?& [7 [ D+ T( l9 r0 e* u
3 K3 j3 Q5 ~$ c* K5 zSpray mold spots with Tilex. * v5 a) o8 a) @9 |/ W: u
, ~, `) M+ R2 DGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. , Z4 d! j% b( ~+ i& t9 A
+ X6 r* @( i$ U5 P. PWrap hair in super absorbent towel. 2 I, w( i+ n$ S9 Z) _ F
: D. X+ J, U* ^% s' M
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. : B _0 ?: H3 C# n
" P- {( t/ K5 A s D, { ?
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
( l Z4 Z) I* [+ o2 a8 m$ ]9 z
2 J0 G6 k! H# @5 `0 O0 `5 \. ]* ^$ H2 D$ F4 R% L3 B
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: & i7 m; ?# [9 w, ~. a$ G
7 _ x) O1 n" N, V# MTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 0 k( {5 T9 `/ n
+ c, A0 @$ `- Z% M* ?3 ?
Walk naked to the bathroom.8 m4 {6 l* D- Q4 C# X$ y, e
7 |. u4 r9 C! H: G2 a) n1 d+ @If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. " r" L, G& g' ?- v/ ~0 t0 s
. j, A9 v S! R: V+ @/ }5 `6 L2 L% j: o
Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 2 u3 H+ [$ U- b! k8 \3 z& \
* i8 u/ U ^: qAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
: P% l+ ~/ E- J
: h, u% V# x# e& ^Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. : Z( q# J2 v. g; s. ~
: _8 |, V; n' y6 ]- M8 j+ F
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
; Z8 { p. X; s: V9 o, t Y* i: A' }+ a
* b# c$ _) |4 O6 e/ V, MFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. c4 j' z) S9 a2 j6 C
' G/ F. l M2 V: S" s( |3 C* C' cSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
6 j# s; p4 ?- {- ^9 p! O& K! N6 s6 |4 |, H3 a
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
t% S. Q1 C' x% @# v @0 v; a! l- ^# C2 _# x* o7 X
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 8 {# ^% I7 q/ `2 U* P- M
v9 P8 s# u2 }6 HPee. 2 J/ ~; I( M+ w+ X! G3 H
, Z r4 I2 N2 ^) d
Rinse off and get out of shower. 3 P( M8 a! x X
/ K" G# d4 ?6 Z/ ZPartially dry off.# M$ R, V5 V1 J+ s0 }2 o4 M
- D+ r1 e$ m) R) w$ a3 |Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
1 k" t' M% f* g
. o5 Z3 Z+ |1 b) U; J' `4 s$ MAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
/ b) O# R! ]4 b% ~* |- f
0 J# f% e1 g/ ~$ CLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
! l+ h9 }" L! A& v9 t2 p5 [6 n# C2 d5 f1 h
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 1 u7 t9 y0 j% x/ h# r7 _: U: g% O
, Q9 x4 w1 k) @3 v" {+ k+ i( j
Throw wet towel on bed. % T, G' e: n" ^9 `
# O7 P" T, B+ f5 r$ r2 j
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
