 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 9 B- U8 r$ E% E; b
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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# z4 g( `& c# K6 N! T/ MWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. , C5 ? C: J& X! [
6 `: g- N$ ^) ?# `4 @% aIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.* T( q1 ~" w) L# v- r0 u1 M
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
& ?0 r& y7 c1 ^' {* I, H4 tmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc./ {6 R, }' d4 Q$ w, x
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ; R) w! i# k. Z" _5 l% ^
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. $ L# u0 Y* ^8 y% M" Q
. O! H6 ~5 M) X0 w( Y2 xRinse conditioner off hair.) A7 X3 G1 c' {4 y
# u9 `: @. O* d; a' G! K; u1 p; ]Shave armpits and legs.! d' v- t9 l' v) z( M
4 @8 S$ k$ A' _' RTurn off shower.* ^* l- T) Z# S! K/ H& |' g+ D- J
f- d5 _6 B% m2 c2 GSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.) L8 X" O8 O1 O- s5 N5 d
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. + J' j( }7 [/ b
# w' S+ } b$ R4 z! L/ YIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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% I6 D3 Y: ?4 t n1 x( {HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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! O# {( p7 N! z8 [Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 1 E1 m% z6 J S/ q
Y, t8 ~ H. ~, ~Walk naked to the bathroom.4 w: h# ?& y/ T; P
: h+ [% q/ e! p" oIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / ^4 U# i- J2 Y- l5 l) M
0 c: g- ?8 K1 g o( [Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 0 H8 P3 {7 Z Y0 z$ Q5 o
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 3 B0 }( `2 l8 h2 A: s. P
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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& q0 _' s) S7 z2 XFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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m% y2 K e; \* gSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. + t1 i( ^3 V! Y/ O
6 M5 d! \/ W0 m$ A7 o; rWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower. & G4 u- b' G# _6 j& A, m
' m0 K) ?4 s& F. E B, fPartially dry off.
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( G9 d2 k" e/ qFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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) N: t' O1 }9 v: [0 f5 nAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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8 W4 B6 h4 B3 S8 M+ g ALeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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1 A0 N, Q' u8 V- w- C9 z; iReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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