 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : " R9 \7 M" H5 W
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks./ E# y, {+ I, m, q9 _ D$ }
% F$ I! a. p: R, l/ O6 ^3 E- b& kWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. : d, N0 [8 j1 F$ T: f( ~- ~9 O
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.5 ^' n) Y [* M# g$ G5 L+ o, |
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
! Z3 e# F# \' Y' C' h K1 T$ f8 zmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. . R+ d+ t7 \/ ?( H8 P4 q
. ]4 |+ A; O( l" S" A& B+ hWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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) h- r3 F1 q1 u; n. oCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..* l- s+ ^* j9 N! G
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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6 x% n# x: j4 l; S1 ?8 _& BWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 2 `2 b9 ]6 Y3 Z8 g2 J' q4 P4 f
$ l" |, f `6 ^. y9 N+ x+ fRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.7 Y% G8 ? ]+ j8 R1 P- o
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Turn off shower.
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6 j" m6 q/ O9 f1 Z A0 u3 qSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.- e+ B5 |3 }! K3 y
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. & y' z+ A& u- R' I. D- \
" m7 W; W$ J! `. W9 sGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 9 y- t% E5 L4 H( \8 E0 O
1 q+ Q) q$ ^" X: C& [8 E5 JWrap hair in super absorbent towel. $ U0 [+ N" `1 ]. d- f3 z8 r
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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6 H+ y+ W6 x9 q- ^6 a4 xIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ) K. T# w' i' D1 p# B) \6 h
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( ~* S$ \6 b8 [5 z" F, ?! Q: CHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2 B$ i% R; E( |
7 C* G) ~" V( G! D/ P; x% f- uWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. . N: u# W+ t; z
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. $ }! U( p& E! {! A) n- u! B. P9 h
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. % x) _' e" s/ k: I a2 [$ o) z
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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8 G% Z- f% k* f: Y' K* s b+ H d( ?/ nBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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) R9 J+ ~3 Z9 C/ z. C: m' g/ y' \Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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s! k: p7 C% d! [Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 0 V, O+ f" W J4 \
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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) f+ d+ O+ f+ J, ]: S( P) WWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.8 o( r$ @6 ^8 s) P
, [. E. z7 V _ oFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. * R; R ?" W: j5 g, F2 S
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. 7 @; F4 O9 P: r& p6 R% b% Z
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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( r* a7 ? V7 S) h# }, r; yReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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9 l" F' p" S5 ~, D0 uIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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