 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ; F1 a9 j X0 w q6 y# ?
4 | e9 ]2 h8 b. V& \7 {
* R2 D2 Q, ?: n( G: M
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3 v. q4 B9 ^3 d( Y
4 N* w/ M9 m# Q
% ?( m$ o: c- [ @% V. W" Z$ m 4 K* Y" ?' w4 E; D/ U
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks./ D u7 U/ O* a7 ]8 w# P' z
% N, g: h# d! HWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. % K- K2 b& o5 F: }
7 _4 G, u2 S0 r: a; {! Y6 @
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.2 S2 `: `( `, S! n9 Z6 K
. Z: R( l( z/ e: }- A5 p
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
# L* H, V3 C6 ^" Ymake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
6 u, O- e6 g5 r' c3 ]* H/ ^( u- r2 ]: [
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 5 h( V9 U3 v/ T7 U5 y
( W7 y ~9 b" }/ H0 w) }
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. & A; N( r! |! v9 n
2 K( e$ ^! E- M) w8 @( i2 O$ O
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.7 D4 B; s ]5 p2 }
9 @) G. {4 o6 G* m$ ^9 F0 ]2 b/ s. rCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
* M5 E% _- ~/ ?& i6 u! `5 I6 B* C) x' @. `5 d/ y
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 3 p6 b+ a4 }# F: Z* j* d- V
5 B4 L h D, T) q- a4 m+ v4 s
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. : b4 `( o, p- n( i0 |
0 m$ z4 ]6 g2 B. tRinse conditioner off hair.
, e J% o$ y+ k* i, c0 S
" J8 }; W4 D/ T, L5 l$ QShave armpits and legs.
2 l* W! [& f$ k$ f& S4 Z8 H8 c! o% x. g) I( b. O% w
Turn off shower.
1 |3 t: G7 @6 [* I: y1 s
9 t0 s5 d1 o* m/ l6 N2 V3 ]% x7 M% VSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.0 \4 D# g6 I: N8 M+ ]
% \7 x" e [, f+ W$ Z. J$ G
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
# H' j* O0 b' O! C' y" v5 J
: l" G3 |! o6 _4 E5 s% l* v6 m& ZGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. . }; K* W& a5 q2 T( E
. s1 v$ n( C& @- kWrap hair in super absorbent towel. h. \. x8 c) l
* t* N! C4 I- `9 P: L% [8 I) ZReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
6 _3 r1 Z, J- @
- _ ?+ @. d0 g0 K0 ]% J) VIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. / e" T' f! K, S; y- @7 w# w
* S+ |/ \9 r+ `+ t5 q( h- @6 |
. g; W. ^; I9 xHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
d0 e# B0 M2 k5 E' s
" G6 L2 D! v6 zTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
M" f1 l1 _# R5 U4 h' S( I: |- X' V7 A7 p. J/ k
Walk naked to the bathroom.( G! U6 T8 y9 J. T& N/ f2 D( K
3 e& r, u; E& Z" m' h
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 9 a: P; {1 T6 I# \; I* ~$ X/ _
( W: h7 V7 F- u7 i5 i" C
Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 5 j' k7 ^$ l5 G* @
B! ~8 M h/ h5 D+ b
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
; d9 q) N! Y6 Z9 d" _7 L. w
$ S3 s) A- L. N9 p( d* y& GGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
# B6 ^2 E. K3 U- }! ^ @* O& O: j a z( j
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
$ F9 b! [: Z! j
3 h( k( L$ d4 c" LFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
3 E8 y& }$ A. U5 X
/ U% V+ y( u( ^Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. ' ?8 L3 O! L1 I8 x. [! {7 u# e6 @
' ?6 y8 n2 A) i. |
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. . u1 ` w' Y2 \ k) E
2 t* x- }* w) `1 q6 H7 b% W4 h5 i
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
( t2 p9 _: j/ C
# ?1 z5 K7 j/ e! \5 V S6 iPee.
& l0 k+ W) W( {, i0 j I% D8 D) @: c* h) r8 {8 Y; N$ v
Rinse off and get out of shower.
8 V# e# @3 x9 E- F- J
# ]' s' E3 J! B7 `& OPartially dry off.- G" d0 ~0 }% ]% x W D9 O
/ M+ j3 d9 q& r! o4 b% E3 z1 K
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
+ t# R/ C4 p! U u( N
* e$ O1 ~' j# }Admire wiener size in mirror again. & H4 X: D- [: l+ F' k/ [
: I; E2 c3 c4 b+ TLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 4 o8 j- G( h: O% r& W
% e9 v* t" h: S; z- R. S
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. # ?% B& r5 v; I& D
( E# @9 `% B0 K9 pThrow wet towel on bed.
4 e- o5 l3 X D+ g3 q8 _2 P
1 T9 c& B6 O7 W, E/ BIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
