 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : . L" `# S' W2 u% P5 T* h* A
) L* r& p$ f3 K! L) ]* G
2 _6 k' d. ]- K$ g--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
9 O' o/ G" L t7 y* Z8 K
. j2 t: A w$ S
1 @1 V. {7 h( y6 N. P% i
2 `; @8 Q7 u3 A0 ^) X8 Y, x- VTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2 [! A- z, u- \, J$ J" p" V7 T/ J& T- |9 }. T
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. - E5 m( f% H; S# ^' Q7 c0 r
$ e% r5 P' K6 Z S- ?* cIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.+ X. y, d$ j Q* i6 e4 {' f! i5 c
8 @$ p. k) W. k$ \: Q+ [
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
1 u2 q3 ^( a& |( J2 @; Wmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
% {8 _. s; W. o" @! x8 x" o1 ~& e* _5 I/ z8 w- j
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
% B" `( [, x& T* r. |+ b: B5 w/ z6 ?
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ; z( t+ r4 G7 q$ i* v! d
& v5 t$ ^9 L4 t3 k0 Q% A
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
& V$ i6 D- b& e. k
/ J: u2 o% w6 ]1 S- J3 R( N# GCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
3 a- t8 s! c2 q4 a0 J- k$ ?5 g6 A' F% t* Y" S& n0 K
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 0 d- r! ~- w& _* M: w: O
7 E) J" V- z% o# l. W
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
" V9 G" _9 A: d5 y5 ?& x2 F: V% g# b. ], U
Rinse conditioner off hair.1 w( a9 D* T2 W( t' \1 z2 A, C
& \* k; y& V3 ~; C* m8 Q' r# v" E
Shave armpits and legs., E2 U4 F+ w. } E+ _, X
% V6 L0 Q% A! R" Y7 ?' t: H
Turn off shower.- y0 i( o! x! F% q( E+ N
) n, V0 K# e- j# e0 u& o1 l4 \
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower., {. f3 k0 y1 \; T' A( ?7 @
; |. `( h; Q) N9 W5 `( ]8 y
Spray mold spots with Tilex. ( Z. I. f4 I# w) c
0 u# ]" s6 v9 X! R! oGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. " |+ \4 N! B" @- v
r J8 U: d2 t) I& E) l$ P8 A1 B
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
% M4 W% n$ t/ P
; o: M% v( P9 E. z) x# o+ ~Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
. ]; L1 c" F, W
$ W" `8 }9 P8 C" i; X. JIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
) o3 A3 B& F- d. J3 ^& y! u% ]* O( V) Y9 B- H& m$ ^
; U; M- Q+ a0 ^7 @. M# D& N, H' o
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: + j1 F) d' r4 G" a
" O) x% x: _% m& {% c0 c: t! b. k
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. * ?! `% v9 B! L* M4 p1 @% i
# T' I! Z& ~/ { t6 b1 l, K, y
Walk naked to the bathroom.
# W' \/ f* ~& J. |9 k
# J3 a/ [6 i" Z/ u! p& qIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
6 \, c8 J( g" x8 i" {9 U0 _7 L! g9 S( W6 g7 `5 @8 s
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
" V& s" ]+ }: x& \$ R1 o0 A7 \9 F" c: O) T R/ X7 b: q) y4 }
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
, s% \3 X4 V/ T8 ?2 v1 J3 Y) H0 B; W8 w3 l" g& y
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
5 x* v1 C) D5 c! r( ~, }% }+ _1 b
3 i! m' k! l4 O# BBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ) ^1 V4 Z4 w, W! @8 d
; o& M" k# C/ h r6 [2 N6 R, ~- M8 @8 vFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. + b- N4 g" I0 J2 U0 Y
2 H$ f" k. O; I# |
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
% _& f: e+ G# k2 L4 z6 R5 L
9 ]4 h& i; D v- Z+ sWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 9 e4 X5 f N# y$ s$ U* \+ |
0 v0 O: o# j8 S( w4 J4 }$ c$ I8 C, e
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. + D8 l% F, o* \2 C
3 | s0 y; H% n _! L" SPee.
4 Y9 {# ^) L- s. T; d: a9 ~5 m' I5 { h: D/ Z! h
Rinse off and get out of shower.
& C% e# r" Z8 \- B1 c2 t7 G4 ]. l5 B/ {* X0 z- b
Partially dry off.. p# x$ a+ s$ Q$ [6 k# Z2 |/ u4 [
& T' [$ I* E3 M% X. [: ?Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. " E0 `" j1 V! h
! U9 G8 a: Q( ]) K: u" ]
Admire wiener size in mirror again. " K( x- b- c9 X- S& k: M
2 v9 d3 `: }4 Y `7 t( CLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. & ^# h; a6 X8 I0 w( |) w
% O1 H! `/ G* f# l2 _- K
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
3 d% `4 }" l3 Q- T i$ t0 A! x9 K, k. Y4 ]1 @
Throw wet towel on bed. 3 q# ]; o/ p( q2 v; F
2 j; ]9 m. |. H0 J, n2 U
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
