 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ' M/ o9 ]3 ]( [ _6 w- {
; n- {- W5 U, y$ I
! K/ P) U8 x! ?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2 _- W4 p, v9 D7 M! I: r: x5 |2 l* j& |0 N, [+ _5 [$ Y
+ V8 l- J U% i. P# N2 E, v
4 A5 E/ W4 f! Z" aTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.8 c8 M1 k! ? N. f$ H K E2 B. \) g
p1 V W7 O' q6 [
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
Q1 z9 I& X/ F* j+ Y0 f
4 Q7 D% s/ C$ k' ~3 [/ h9 }If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
! C Q/ |1 t8 x9 @, M
4 ~! M `0 J& Y" V7 SLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
2 w, ^; p6 n& | z) \6 s5 `make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
; D2 R! J: b+ F/ s! V9 V7 [+ c3 w% @/ X5 C7 ]! \7 @' f
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
+ Y5 |4 d( t% k: { z% l t7 b3 ^6 V9 O
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 8 E; }0 J# u* `8 G
+ D9 s0 S! J3 q$ o# A; W/ G$ s
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.; j$ V* g M% a) A9 s; N2 C
1 y5 F2 v: J2 p2 @& T/ B
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..$ Q3 z- N/ L) X1 t% x2 s p: v. W
) f' ~9 h9 w0 r0 {9 Q
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
, v6 p8 W) t5 ?, w3 g% f$ ~% _5 T
5 o& F- I& O% ^8 ^Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
- ?9 C# U: A. r1 ~
% t/ v+ K' d: Q+ }. z# Q( {; V; gRinse conditioner off hair.
6 y6 s1 H- }" R$ d) M/ r$ l3 a
: A _: d% E5 E/ B! N- R4 vShave armpits and legs.9 L+ I# C1 c4 G2 b, z, O% x, X; J7 j
% @5 p' \. k9 f( U8 ^' LTurn off shower.
3 Y5 l$ g9 j9 b( q4 d
6 v" R+ ?! T6 }$ v& KSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
7 X* C8 q7 R& p
8 W! ~# E! V! [; w* |' W1 B& ZSpray mold spots with Tilex. 0 v# L# Q' c4 ]: g; X, e7 p5 A
7 ^- }. O& Q: C9 r* g* h
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 8 j6 j& ^8 V% R# x0 l. N
. r# }& X1 R f( h+ [, j2 \Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. ( Q- h, t6 e4 ~3 q
. ^" D V2 A4 D! Z- h% D: M
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
, g% p; H: s) ] A% m$ x
( Q" S0 `2 j' ]( ~) J P) @If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
6 d' [9 e9 j0 b* ? r' s% [1 P+ G1 ~
2 l' h3 w! _& r, X' n/ c, zHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: / g8 W0 _' C R# P
1 K7 L; H, B+ w8 M" y/ j1 B
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
3 W5 N5 c! i$ J9 d- o7 g+ k) `% ]/ A6 A3 B& Q
Walk naked to the bathroom.) T" |& _4 @9 N% a% l) W# d3 ?
9 O' D1 q; p1 w" d4 E0 zIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / H; v2 d6 G6 v& f$ q
/ z6 s% S# Y% h6 r* O3 yLook at your manly physique in the mirror. ; I0 ~1 a- j8 c+ G5 R H# O: e
# P' ~1 [+ f! d- v4 ~" N
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
' E# r; N- N( ^+ B! t( K% T5 a
1 A# E; p) v5 p, pGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
% W! M- [3 y8 h' J
4 {7 b( Q1 }! V3 QBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 6 {9 G3 t6 S: y: x9 n9 S
1 U6 a+ f6 A! P1 o: a$ bFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
$ e- j0 p- @: ]- U8 f" M. Q& T6 p2 Z4 g
% T4 H- G2 c" s; D o8 ~Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 3 K; G' [7 U( w4 w! s' T
# i) y% i) @% K5 A7 L F0 @
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
$ P1 d9 x6 w6 T& }, _( I
+ e! I. o) ~' i8 |- i, F; uWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Y4 q1 J% R& \5 |
7 S; f' u6 I& S* a. P3 [5 p
Pee.
! W$ ^5 V0 J/ c/ ?
* u! W# b* S" P7 mRinse off and get out of shower. ) Z/ e% ]: s7 ]: }8 _
4 y3 }+ F6 D- }5 ]( k( e& D
Partially dry off.7 [* U5 i' q8 n) J" |
9 b U( P7 |: L% P) x$ E- ^2 |Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
. H5 X. h6 @( g4 } d
+ g( v8 V, H5 o+ b) N) A, MAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 8 x9 v8 }* v$ X9 j; B, u
7 O$ c6 P" J0 O8 c) v4 \1 RLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
$ H3 }) x$ [ i, ]8 K/ G: g. d- l% h: K! ^
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
1 l% I: E% Z O9 A( h! S @) S
, z: h. t% s$ w Z& v, p( c' A7 _3 vThrow wet towel on bed. 2 @6 r7 n' V, b
3 C# M* {5 D# |9 L: NIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
