 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : / A: C1 G7 R% {! X/ a
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* n& T" p5 o/ B$ \' P# kTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.# I Z% S7 k. m) n+ x6 J) m
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.3 z5 r) ]" C1 _1 _ C9 t1 C
9 l; S+ d/ ~6 \: K OLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 2 d/ O) Q* i$ A# v; b3 g
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.7 f4 r2 ?6 I! n$ Q# ]9 ~1 [
* ?; ^. N: i, d( a7 {Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 6 @3 l3 K6 N9 r0 P# v) {, Z) C4 l4 J
1 v: x: U7 x2 W0 [ A: {Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 2 V) E2 u+ v) H, W7 K9 e) T
: V/ y# T; s# Z: F( f$ CWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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! f# a8 q, a( E, W, hWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 3 f9 Q; \) Z) Q; \8 l3 M4 h% w
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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9 a4 X' Y Q* K" [Shave armpits and legs.1 r! t: j# q5 @
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.5 A2 s$ W( o7 B) f( G4 U! ]4 r
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. % Q5 D3 [6 n6 @0 O6 c
( f0 u w( j! |! o" d& BGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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5 T1 _6 S4 c! m# a- U8 [7 RWrap hair in super absorbent towel. 3 ]* a T3 J- H5 e/ N8 t" {1 f
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ; C: w' i6 l2 ~7 J K+ |
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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" @( \/ u8 f3 |& `7 J( I5 J3 n4 UTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. & `: _4 l* t! _5 K
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Walk naked to the bathroom.8 l/ v" u0 L* @, T8 y6 \; ]
8 V9 |9 b/ J7 BIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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: q7 s( `( m# EAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. , J* B7 k% W+ X) H/ Q. X- u- p
/ A/ r# a2 G0 u. _! x- iGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. + z' ~" D8 e; I: P
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. % V0 t; ^$ E' |* t3 i
^, Y3 ?; o+ w1 p% f$ IFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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' v$ N+ l7 b: u$ ySpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 0 U; I* _3 l) L
# ~1 o3 p4 v( fWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ! x/ d. V( k) O" g/ p
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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3 [, }* t$ U" y& E W, J8 E- gPartially dry off.* I# X! j- N$ [
3 }! D$ U5 |8 W9 H( w6 W$ u# o6 f$ XFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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- |& s: }$ E5 EAdmire wiener size in mirror again. : a* m9 p. G6 u3 Y
8 J1 [2 U- ^; F, l! }Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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2 @: Z& D {; H: g+ U" tReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. : B/ S" r- _0 g0 m1 D, T* n
$ Z7 F2 D1 ^1 m- |8 L' O& Q% wIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
