 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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8 U2 P' v* _7 I) K& [8 lTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. J6 n. V# q6 ]' W. L/ o
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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1 P3 Z: g/ M& c8 [If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.3 |' t' N/ F! u6 T
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 9 {3 w: `! x$ @- ?1 u$ c" ^
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.# y# K7 c; c0 K
' l' p; |6 C8 S$ h' V2 h* h8 I3 ^Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ) M, r8 k7 R; N! d# s
3 h- C0 M0 e' O7 v. `Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. " n3 U9 D. q7 y' L b( q3 _+ J
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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# r4 e0 n' r; {9 P& m& yRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.! q% l. P% |) g% X
/ Q- i% i! k7 O" A [1 SSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.4 a. }. t/ f1 H% |3 ^1 @
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. ( k9 d5 E7 D- c& T# D
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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3 ? d/ ~% l; |8 b2 L, D! p5 oIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 5 }: g. y( e) H, k1 M
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ! M+ ~/ P1 f% V. B/ J% z
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. : {5 o6 n! ~3 G' ?1 [' @& L4 P {! o% G
* A! j$ o: W6 w. a V1 H, wWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ) o6 E% u. m% n, O& j7 J
; w8 \ d0 D7 p6 l" K+ h/ H2 fLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 6 \' k6 u9 d; \5 U. L) x' X
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. : c" I9 h) l K& ]5 e
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. $ B4 M0 `1 b9 X
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ! r; v2 a! d8 F) p4 d, P) X
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 7 D$ P* R" m6 n9 x
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. / m: Q) ?3 E& Z' U
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ) L2 e9 i7 x$ D2 e' V
/ f# R- y8 K5 R* H; R4 fWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. 1 G- J+ ^1 A5 e% q- m6 @
' J. A, c* f( X3 S/ sRinse off and get out of shower. : w" n5 `6 D6 P7 f
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Partially dry off.$ w. ^' c8 `3 z9 g2 } b. q4 h* `
2 C A& m+ e; b! W" gFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. % x0 D2 a9 N% d6 j2 L& _
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. # s0 |! `# R7 e
. p% j/ i7 M) Q: ~Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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7 W& }# c0 X9 @; F% TThrow wet towel on bed. * `0 \: I- j4 M0 r
# z, y( C4 }% c: d, UIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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