 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 2 K F4 b: Z' u, i
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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' i& n- D: z; S& j# A! B4 u4 pIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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/ c- }9 V- C8 v. }8 O7 bLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
! V1 p# x' ]& @7 p( {/ ~4 h7 X, s9 _make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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, d2 s" Q6 P- s/ t; m" \7 ZGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. $ Z$ q* J. B3 ^; `$ q, l8 z
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.7 m* e, X i) U( y) S7 Q* G! {
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..+ g& z7 ?8 M6 D2 K Y/ M& q. S
! O6 { j! Z5 r$ Z8 o) JWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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. W& O4 @0 F1 f+ Q+ o1 jWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 6 Y: R8 i; k. N* Q, [4 U7 k
% } z* L! C% H- ?Rinse conditioner off hair.& n. e/ A5 b: u- |- f
2 c( Q% _7 h) M V# l; K* ]2 l5 LShave armpits and legs.. ^/ j7 ]$ Q( q8 G& \- q Q
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Turn off shower., Y) _$ T9 o9 H8 Q4 D3 k# O' e
) \/ |9 i8 u3 zSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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6 }' @) K' k7 N; A3 {" `8 cWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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, \- @- {) |6 G& @3 KReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. $ f0 v; {# y$ v# o0 D- N) h5 A! Z
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ; K" {# B6 K0 p6 ^- I
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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; O( B8 Y$ \0 N2 X9 c" I4 KTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. ( _/ z+ o; W: a* X& W- t
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. - d4 g. G- s7 \- R6 m6 t7 l1 s* ]
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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6 _( I- o6 s5 ~: G3 U0 KFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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' i" ]/ [8 V/ SSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. , u$ d2 I+ }! P8 G% f
4 P3 J) T+ E0 j- I `+ P3 P6 n, I8 l# vWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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[9 W. P8 S+ B- q+ uRinse off and get out of shower. & i) F$ j* f3 D, J/ u) Z
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Partially dry off.
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o* t( s. }# n/ s; r7 H: gFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. $ M( [! W- ?+ l' Q
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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$ v; d- d, ~* n2 h1 e3 f7 c' F4 |Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 7 S q$ m* f1 \' N5 [
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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8 Q: o- [9 v3 z% ]7 F% h8 iIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
