 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : ) d% N- d2 j1 C/ N% v
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.; Z2 y6 H) O' [: M
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- : U6 a: n. m7 z' G9 Y% C
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. ( E1 Q7 i- V- R/ C0 v0 _6 ]
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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+ T' R1 S1 R* i3 ?" QWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 5 m) f" a, u( Q1 o
4 S) Q) h& b6 c1 d2 I. x, MWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ' z( H) C/ Q! D& |9 y
* Q. i k' A9 d6 jRinse conditioner off hair. R5 `& B! X$ }& E6 [! J$ K
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Shave armpits and legs." `6 s2 P; z- w/ U. S& A
( q, T( Q$ ^6 Q' k" b# {+ tTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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& o# |- w1 i/ P6 u8 tSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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" S1 ]$ W/ T; B) NGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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1 T" q5 x5 H1 o( {6 C+ Z5 E! RIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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0 I8 d: u) g2 }3 sHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: , ]( D9 ~4 @" B8 u" K% i
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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, J5 c9 I4 g! VWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ) M5 z6 C' `1 y- s4 s& D2 A
: j' x' H; E+ g8 Q( H7 ?) s `' }8 jLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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7 _( l8 P6 I! L# Y4 ^7 j9 R4 SAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 3 G5 | m! `& `) o. F
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. # e! O0 V& Z: z# _2 K$ P
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. % v" x: Y+ c( h$ M4 I, A |
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 3 B5 ]* p8 G6 E3 Y C# i
% V. h! i) D+ o% e9 X2 c- V1 gWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. % G" K7 Q, [6 w
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; N. F3 @- E j) `7 ARinse off and get out of shower. " Y5 S2 M% Z J/ p5 [; a7 h" k
7 c- B: [* P% }5 z/ w) f" B4 a; WPartially dry off.. [- n$ |. _8 e9 y2 R5 J
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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/ I$ @2 C+ J# C: j2 M7 |Admire wiener size in mirror again. * f! y' t+ E: f7 U' c5 N; d
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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+ H2 v4 b* r6 x+ |+ oReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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6 e+ K; F( Z8 D+ qThrow wet towel on bed. % ` d9 E: _/ a: M* V! j0 C3 k
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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