 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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' x4 p# M) Y; r9 J. n% S0 uWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.& W. t6 F' D3 j: d" d4 G
7 }9 N4 \( q6 O2 J3 m9 @Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 8 ?1 {0 S1 O" B
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.3 C2 D3 H8 c' S" L( r
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 1 L& f6 D v. e1 T2 B9 l5 V5 Y- T
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ' n+ j( r) a4 s" d+ c
( X* b3 W5 C# \( TWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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+ ]6 y* m9 _! JCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ( e) ]* D5 @, v9 s* l1 L. `
6 z' y. F( x. z* i( P% G SWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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& q8 L1 I" B# \, p- \) QRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.6 a, N# Y/ k% B( N
3 `: A8 A9 s. L; ?) s& l. i3 HTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.& i; L! H/ d, f5 L8 W4 o6 A
6 O T6 S0 g0 |) Y/ i$ G2 F2 O2 iSpray mold spots with Tilex. ' ^2 `" o( k( [% Y; S& R
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. & Y/ y& {( I5 ^3 c O5 q
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 1 x/ I/ c0 E$ A' D d
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_3 X, w5 G* u1 J4 n% L( p, m# |HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. : y _5 B1 e8 n+ G; a, h$ o n
; f# x: a z( o7 w% ~* f- o+ ]Walk naked to the bathroom.0 A C8 R5 t+ S
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. * T6 t8 G2 x4 A8 K! H
: Y% O D8 N! F: g3 U" YLook at your manly physique in the mirror. - G0 P. u5 n4 ]
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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, O" o2 K* o2 U/ J3 C8 G( j1 LGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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, ^- f6 M. r, l: M- KFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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: @+ i0 ], n5 G# w8 XWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower. 5 W# l) I/ Y) c( r" j
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Partially dry off.9 ^3 Z P' m4 l9 o1 {
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Q W9 r$ k/ P- {' dAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 2 Z. h) u" a) ?# [! ?; P" M
7 M0 X- I3 G( O2 O2 l2 _4 BReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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