 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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6 Q6 \ s( l/ V7 m- RTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.! j2 _4 u4 B% o4 s1 y e$ o9 A
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. , z( X6 y$ N6 M: `# y G8 L. ?
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.* i% B0 V8 n0 \* Y
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ) f# O6 m$ `9 ~# [. K1 c* ?
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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8 j& h4 z2 `* p: X- N1 h$ vWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 8 B9 Q( A$ b3 v5 r) x& v
' `! D4 Z! v% b+ i9 H+ \Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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' S8 W1 G& l. u+ y } SWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. o$ g, E+ i5 d! [; }8 \; l
_; u0 W% l& bWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair." f: B* d( T% K6 D) z3 M0 a
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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) V8 v) m6 q* Q3 u0 h0 ?Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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& m8 H, t; V" ]! w+ fGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. + ~) e# A7 v1 O( Y4 A0 ] d( R& B
+ `& s f; q D8 |Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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v! G( @2 t+ N) z0 I: @Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. " x0 E& {/ `% C, e
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. - C1 S' B0 O, S4 p
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' j' I5 S6 L, U! \# K, lHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: & i& o0 t8 c& u! e6 q. r
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.0 x' y" K; C. X5 Z: M1 S& ?
; y' n- j1 D7 ?8 WIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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7 f( G' J# F2 N! ~1 |Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. % O7 B2 i' k" n, _& R. m( v
8 X' j5 G( q5 }/ p3 `9 X! tGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. ( @ L" `/ p- Q( X! |
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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% \* _+ j# E4 w1 c5 w4 `/ }Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee.
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* h( P2 f& g4 x8 K5 |6 NRinse off and get out of shower. 6 d' D3 T3 S5 Q7 ~' U! d
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Partially dry off.5 W3 e; a. L! P* E
2 X7 E( T6 D+ t4 T* l8 wFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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, o5 L( B% ?' N: O {7 p$ iLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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6 _* x1 V) ^' W5 F+ L X- CReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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" I4 [! x2 P' F" q* eThrow wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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