 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : , C( X( ?4 c. ]. F I$ Y# l! b
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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2 s% \2 P5 ^/ F& D1 `Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ( {" q/ s7 w0 t; Y( @
5 m; N* q! w& U& O4 MIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- & u+ @! P% c1 v: W
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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# \* _8 N8 `3 {. tGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 6 T. w d, V+ p; O0 `
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. % A8 h, g1 j" D$ o
. ~8 J5 n' h5 C# ^* V: V1 x) \Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.& ~' b% X8 e+ f2 q
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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5 L( U& u! x! W; E* bWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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& t2 R; H2 Q: k9 g5 \$ D; qShave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.) g0 v$ G. Q# Z. s
# w. U8 m; B6 L* b0 }Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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; g' a9 \1 q' d$ {+ u. mGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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( N1 b6 c1 A7 Y8 f! G6 b6 ]/ ?Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 4 {4 v( z/ j5 ~7 `+ D
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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) {! O6 K0 ]5 H/ v+ EHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. . G! U9 |2 p* u2 [
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Walk naked to the bathroom.$ k' J& i# Z, Z6 Q1 I; [
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. * z- v3 H0 {4 H, ^
1 R+ _: f% B" YAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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! m" }* i6 J! T/ z; n+ X! FFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 1 Z& o8 o" z ?, p8 i/ x1 d' d; s
! D* g) z7 f; c4 V. v7 @Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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# P& z, S: A6 n4 H" N6 m# q% w; ?Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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2 B1 K: K& S3 Z( xWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 9 S, N8 ?8 M1 u4 [
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.' c/ A2 _5 U1 n2 ^4 ?. c
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. , z$ Q$ K" O* @( \! U+ Y
/ g( `0 A& |* a# o6 GAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 8 w2 z- \* d* G- x* j& q
" w9 _! r! F8 H. t0 m) JLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 5 A; x& E: M k
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. " s$ P r4 g, Q/ n
5 z4 |! N) q% C1 K- fIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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