 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : h; ~- y5 v8 s% A! W8 g
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.: @6 ]9 F, R- a1 G
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
+ O% N# ?, S- [8 } Zmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.' _9 s3 v& ^1 m' C
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.7 k# H8 ~: b0 G+ f9 s
5 z2 J+ E) Y8 W1 w5 }/ v1 SCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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! b2 c. b' N |3 W ^! t8 vWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. & e: n( ]- P( a" L* o
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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. Y2 N! k: W: n' LRinse conditioner off hair.$ [. P* B' ^$ w6 M+ }
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Shave armpits and legs.
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6 F1 C! m6 B3 U" `Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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3 v) J7 u$ ^$ I1 j& F& S5 x6 oGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. , j! A$ }. C+ E
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 2 M, M: s) o. b6 t
( L( q7 c0 ^# j& H" a2 D7 \If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. $ d- T1 d* H0 }) E% i
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/ D9 h. G5 R1 g$ j7 v3 M' vHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ' ^( l, E# i5 d0 W" S+ d2 k
. Q/ z6 C# [: T' A/ QTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 7 m* P4 I6 P7 b6 N6 s3 \* P
) p1 [. o% R' UWalk naked to the bathroom.4 d- E/ ~; {, i. ~( e
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. ( N" P y: e ?6 _' t, ` L( Y
/ b. u5 u. d7 X* F! YLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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# D% p% K' s: D; j0 @$ gAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. / x+ U& ]4 `1 q* `1 S; X) @$ S% }
4 N: z" ^; ?0 {+ S PGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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: c) O; m4 k8 u* Q/ ]: h; n/ J( m) |" yFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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; |! n0 ^: M i; ?, C6 j( mWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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9 z+ h `6 [# X0 P5 Z% sPee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower. % P4 r/ @- ]8 T! t4 K' }
- p3 ^4 ]& V8 o9 a- W* G9 \, hPartially dry off.5 ~3 u: @: Y7 G7 U- H/ a) y+ \- J& U
1 D ^6 u( a8 a9 N' U4 QFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 4 ^& P! _% G1 d
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ( m5 R- L0 M! `$ F& B- ]/ z4 N
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
