 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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( V* F8 P. l* z2 L% J5 I2 u+ D KTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.9 x [, [% [5 @) q; K
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ' }" K; C9 k* U8 Q' @' s8 B
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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m7 O* f6 a6 b, U+ zLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- - i0 J& S6 l4 k2 u3 Y- \
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 1 ]$ y" Q. D7 @+ c
" d2 j! }% n/ m2 eWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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* Y0 o. U' h4 n' B* g2 eCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..3 v/ p5 {, L8 s" h$ W, G' Z
0 ~/ c1 z5 N g) ^" A5 h+ e0 `7 TWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 3 f2 D' m0 _7 a1 j( S$ f
- D% i1 c' \1 L) |Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 1 D3 R( r, e% {5 F6 G# D
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Rinse conditioner off hair. t* L9 J! X5 g: k/ ^5 V" e
8 e8 d" a; v1 o5 U' z# ~) c0 r2 RShave armpits and legs.8 S- L" p2 c. {4 i
! i: N" J) F5 p$ l* z4 zTurn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. % N; U+ P" X' Y. G" X: v
. M+ C$ J" G K, _% t" MGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 5 x# S4 Q( k/ L
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. # P& ]# m8 P( K! T4 w9 ~' ~0 e6 l
) T5 J' ^' ^, ~If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. , N9 Q. p- Q7 y% \) e; }. K
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. V) k: G, l9 Q- h# OHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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! O" o3 \ r& r2 X" X( u1 {Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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7 c8 w$ R+ K! b( k: y* {3 zIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 1 |6 q* l. D. F4 h6 Q7 q# [1 N
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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8 u, [* b) \! W/ QGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 8 ?- K7 u& ^* a
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. : {% a& s/ e ~6 i: ~* y3 x+ N/ g
7 P% L5 A1 h) w }Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. ; u! _" f; [+ Z0 k: y, c/ \& L% L
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. % D( _+ k$ q- y' a. w& o: w# V
! x' G% C+ p( z- ~; zWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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2 R4 F3 A' N- f; K! m2 FWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. 6 x* D# u* h( j2 z; {
8 i* t- f, O8 o6 C( CRinse off and get out of shower. b1 f' b% c' O [- Z3 E0 ~
2 h; M0 v/ q" b# N* E0 QPartially dry off.
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! F, S3 S; }% B! bFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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2 ~# u" U# c# V: S* j2 _- i9 wAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 8 a0 m5 k' f8 H) I/ i8 O L
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 2 A& [# L" I6 c6 R
! q0 `& i! q0 q% ^Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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