 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : - ]7 {0 U/ Y6 @, Y
6 p, H5 {6 d! G& R4 T
1 [" a( m1 W" d5 ~--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
: Q+ x8 m: T6 o6 f$ Y8 p5 {( G7 U9 W
4 t3 E7 D ?3 q1 c- G m3 M & K& y1 c: G0 }: s- t) o" M
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
% q) q6 Q4 `- o; l$ m, \' ^# X, w: w, F
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. $ |, ~! T1 s0 W2 \& p2 A* t! E
, z( U0 O! ?9 ~) y! ^1 N& G% HIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas./ P+ O* G3 C7 h! ]/ E+ i
5 p+ \) t8 a9 m, ~% k6 i& PLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- % o9 W# Z i% `; g1 ^6 F
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
0 Q/ S8 e1 {, q& [# Y& S
% T) o, O' S5 p1 v+ MGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 9 ^2 V7 H1 r% T& k- z
4 y( @/ G: W8 Z: v) d, i
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
# `6 f3 V7 s; Z8 E# M1 \- q
( v+ J, h# F2 F; X, ?) q7 `" DWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
1 d. l; A4 S+ Z/ d! ^2 O( N; m# u5 y3 |9 }" j
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
* B, u+ S0 k4 S; H& Z, \* C8 C" n; W7 Z2 q
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 3 K/ k9 Y6 ]8 f( c! i
# f, p7 S- U9 ^0 k
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 9 k+ F, h) S0 q
- `# Y/ y( D8 N) D) N
Rinse conditioner off hair.
6 |1 O5 ?! N; m5 ]% g% Y# U. Z* i! l+ ?
Shave armpits and legs.
, S* @, S' X# g3 v' M2 |
2 y' l/ ?# F* q% MTurn off shower.1 J, S; F: t B1 P% e
/ j6 x1 V6 E! Q6 _- ~0 DSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.: X7 m' @1 _* U' n/ a# E
& H: l! _/ u. T, [4 a; `
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
6 J0 O8 v/ G3 O: }$ S0 @7 `+ A. Z5 m$ s! j6 ~! ] I8 G
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
7 F6 q; N9 \6 S. U4 J, U# s4 f. d; w) g4 M. W1 f2 ?" k
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 0 B9 n9 N$ P# w! l
/ e: [, _5 R. T, r- ? rReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 4 [2 M; s9 U$ g g5 b; Q% O" S ^
/ f7 n6 m! Q8 M. W$ t
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
9 F& b- p7 F$ ~+ Q! n1 Z# x$ |7 i* w4 s' t3 U( _2 i9 H( S3 B
: d* {8 Q/ t. x2 j% w: L& @HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
2 F/ K+ ` ]# i
" p ? X/ ?* J5 ATake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
/ c0 `7 a9 i# {' o3 e: u6 E# V" V# B3 z5 U& U7 u( Y) ~
Walk naked to the bathroom.3 r0 Y2 P: N& U4 f& y* e
" g; P& v9 P4 J U3 KIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 3 I. U. ^& \ u4 Q0 C; j
5 ]1 P; @* p+ oLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
% v! j1 s. |+ T" X, H# m8 S/ p3 Z3 K: r2 K+ o1 T9 k1 _
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
# }: {, z2 t, E9 E9 i- I& G3 B& G U t0 h
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
) I' u9 r6 Q- b' J& e$ s
. v C" s" {* ? y: d' Y# s/ hBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. & R, y8 [9 M& a* R
& c) z( l8 p- w0 H/ p/ X% F
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 9 R- d/ m9 C) B$ I3 Z. Q( p
: G* C; _0 p/ x" ~Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. + k) ^: Z' [4 t4 q+ v
: S( p3 D3 B8 L& SWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
9 b$ }% i# R9 l" {& R( m1 g- R/ M$ X
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ' D' B) l2 D0 Z' M/ z
7 C1 Q1 l2 S. R* _9 P+ r
Pee. 0 d' l* Z' Z: j P( \
* L/ Q2 R9 v! C1 f- c5 rRinse off and get out of shower. . H6 `" T; J1 n
0 F! D+ `& R! E$ X) [$ r9 P
Partially dry off.
. [. }& j \. e0 s6 U9 Q5 |$ |6 t, g
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 7 I5 g2 d, i \0 F
/ A- X7 y3 T, q2 G( q4 K) E; TAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
9 V% a( g/ K1 S' j' g6 X' n8 E" ]8 h9 r( c9 c* G5 R
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
1 u! y ?9 u/ y, J8 F4 `2 M) M$ C w
( m* a5 a+ r" r& C' NReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. " N" a+ G. @ g2 B
6 h+ T) i P1 k* j% U
Throw wet towel on bed.
4 y5 {. z9 X- ~1 k/ |6 A& Q- |+ W* Q2 M1 _, _" @
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
