 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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+ ?9 l; [8 @, n( j. }Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.8 o0 y: y( ?' w# L
3 A4 j3 _2 s. N& J3 xLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
+ A8 I1 t( i: X; S6 z& ~0 ymake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.( D: b/ M& m E
1 u8 P6 E/ K' ]; d: S) LGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. , b1 Y5 F! ?7 J& F: r
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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( c, F1 R; M* P$ r# Z! e6 EWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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2 l# ` L# E% P$ o1 uCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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, c# W7 z" y U/ @2 p0 hWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.$ Q7 G5 P0 ~9 E. Z* Y) e
9 k9 E# H4 \/ r7 {9 Y, \Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.5 P2 m0 x( A8 z, L9 U
$ G% z( X6 g6 y3 V- mSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.+ Y6 h& e2 ^5 @0 R' W2 H8 V4 ]; ]: k
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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, | B5 ?: |1 |; ~. bGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. , L& T _- u: O# Q! p$ q
, Z! x- D+ m3 p7 g- GWrap hair in super absorbent towel. & X: L* \7 k6 c! w, f( R& |
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 9 u* ` Z; U/ Z0 |& Z9 n
8 ~6 q; `5 C; N; c0 o. GIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 6 L7 U W0 N& J" \7 j) c
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: g5 M' N/ a" @; [5 UHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: $ f0 X9 i8 L* m# {
4 e2 A/ s( g: R8 F2 x0 iTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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& Z% s7 f! Y7 yLook at your manly physique in the mirror. ( k3 y. C6 U% G5 w3 G
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 6 @7 l! \8 j! L7 j3 \* g
" |- i" |; r6 M3 f! hGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 5 A6 o- \7 L/ ~' _. k
6 _' y b1 D: z0 e9 f) s& iBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. " N; c& ?' s& p; { l
0 s! a% J# P) [ d1 uWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. e0 G m" G& w4 V
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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/ C( r9 y( I8 E* M* L3 }) aPee. X% F- G' X3 r, T
& O* F4 t' W6 r7 ^: t" l% C5 cRinse off and get out of shower. 2 V4 w' e# t# }9 H' D
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Partially dry off.
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0 u! B0 l7 R4 D+ |! Y0 o: V6 L. w7 iFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. / R* i+ A+ ]5 J7 x0 z. X6 u0 o
& ~/ ]( y1 ]4 `* e, ~$ y# P9 tLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 4 |1 I4 e- r5 v5 M+ M6 Z! b# Z ?
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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" E: ]( p4 E% [' C7 WIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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