 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
( {8 O/ u, C4 B j, C: c& p i6 r6 H F% S& C+ F. N
; e8 p; X8 V; D7 L- f/ h; h& z--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2 T6 V2 M% X0 K! }( Z2 t7 e. E" ~+ B! S. Y
2 D) ^8 e7 E% G
3 R; n+ `2 n# g- ?% H. D. y/ {6 y
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.# J1 U/ K+ G: \+ _. v" v
/ E6 M) D& C4 t, m8 G" ^" c r/ PWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. : k7 O! a4 l# e+ F
/ [* ], u3 G. s& W/ i3 ]
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
5 w% y; {6 k. ]' G( _1 ^1 Q1 f' Y# P1 M
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
# d" e% E9 M4 W( E- V5 Amake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
2 v# U! k/ F7 p* w: {% r& I1 U$ S) @% s9 Z* B- v4 B
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. % i# D2 A; M7 F- H
* R: y& c1 P6 J1 {: O! tWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ; B7 Y. D. V5 O J& c- J
% S$ O5 { Q, A, {9 gWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.1 c& }4 B) Z* H1 a& V. H. s5 l
" Y. K, A4 ?3 h7 O3 U! U8 BCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
, l+ B. \6 L' g# [$ ^/ Z$ y/ ~8 b; ^1 v) |6 C% ?3 p
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 1 @$ |) ]4 ~% }6 o0 d; \
% r: ~# X; }% I; E
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. m% V$ z+ k( P$ t
/ [0 E# z T$ A4 b+ z
Rinse conditioner off hair.
& L) L2 k3 @$ I3 q* ?* _) X& a" b+ b/ C
Shave armpits and legs.2 W1 M% x/ Y I/ x0 F
H( E" c) ^- L/ sTurn off shower.5 ]. H0 I! q, s
+ `' Z5 r7 Z! ]& Q
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. u _& m6 T; ^' @9 o
3 p( T# M0 y E K, M
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
1 C: p: B& @. x/ L; S6 Y8 V8 Y5 n+ Q% D6 q- j
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. " }7 j( Z( b% K
8 x! P) f# O3 ^- |Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
6 Y( K, A6 |, u. y5 }0 F! }
) r" Y" \1 a" F+ B% [9 G: J% @Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. / F- d& J! S I; u( K
1 |; a+ V: A% X; W" `0 y1 I
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. , {) T, }3 n) d: Y; U9 L& x2 g! g
+ X2 s. Q2 i7 m5 K
2 X" p9 ?- [( l! X" q
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ( y r5 k7 U: z5 h% y) q; F2 ^- L
6 |# Y" W) A p/ s3 I" yTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
h2 A# U5 A# S. _* ]) t& }$ S* W; C) B) T1 a
Walk naked to the bathroom.# u6 Z# y/ j1 o
9 g" Q- r' {' ^
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. - g5 X0 Z4 `, R
7 }1 s% T1 b# a4 d6 J, d
Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 7 Q" p; i" g0 m( \7 w
2 _& A% F: m7 T& }
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. + o$ _. A4 N. y8 n. ?4 O
- t: t+ v; y( N5 U& B! E& B9 y
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
/ b5 ^* k' ]7 J2 i# s6 ?+ \5 H" t8 |" B$ c3 A
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. z r0 e0 T- O. Q2 Z/ U7 z
8 D1 [, ~" x6 T3 O4 U
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. . j9 x. \ Q& Q; t# g' n( ~% N. _7 B- }" d
& m5 _8 c8 {4 i1 FSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 6 T7 D+ b$ r% p4 g+ c
8 O$ L }% e( K; kWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
! C6 T& O9 i H: Z6 v
2 ~1 V5 z S4 o# ?/ u* FWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
* y% L! ^9 ]* }1 F1 x
1 |. T% W/ P8 ^& C; i$ hPee. 4 b4 X" C% o0 g" @8 y5 F
, x4 r5 x2 H. i) T- Q" ARinse off and get out of shower.
9 q( t$ C1 L, C# B, y
6 W4 b }( \! \5 ^+ U, C9 a; O4 IPartially dry off.
- T" c" f- j2 t0 J* j9 M8 }! I- x5 k7 Z3 b6 n% m
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 3 r: N( C5 L' _+ U3 Z; B$ u. }: V
4 ]" W2 y- A' m ^) B9 NAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
6 e( c0 O3 s' c3 v" l& r
3 E( D2 Z- D1 g& I$ E" JLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
# p5 x% A7 b+ p9 e! M) a% x
! d* e" z: i3 ^) }Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 7 i) Q F2 v* d: p- O" w& w2 T2 s
d# b* d* b5 U6 L; S+ | k. B0 H
Throw wet towel on bed. ( |% |$ B; {0 N% \/ E$ i
8 u% n5 Q6 K8 Z1 S, dIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
