 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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3 b, j/ `! l" OTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks., A8 O" F" E6 a( X% n. X5 b
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. # N; x; j3 ]2 c( z8 p; u; I
& F0 v3 V- i& u, lIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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) f1 e1 ^ L8 y' vLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- - t8 X& f& [; j, f- i1 F
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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' p7 Z( \8 C! b/ A1 N$ h. wGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 2 U& N/ k! M ^% X& v6 B3 }4 d
8 q( T C/ y: k a2 v; J' dWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. + z x7 @" p1 C! E; ~1 t7 l
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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+ ?9 \" B. ]8 }) ICondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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! v }) [2 y) c: K* lWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. - x @" t+ m o: Y% S
' I' p! j1 I: `8 y Q. H" ?! PRinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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8 \% _& j! ^5 I# Q% V: PTurn off shower.
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6 i" O* r7 f& @! |; a! F$ Z% J& ESqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.3 O' O+ T5 J/ J% s' U
$ f$ Y4 o7 n9 t/ p* s. D" {Spray mold spots with Tilex. - d5 P' h% l+ y* J2 q: x
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. & O4 H' V3 H# Z7 V1 V
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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! G( I! Q/ M S8 R. q6 B; LReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 2 `, K/ ~+ u, b5 D/ N( p2 _9 l
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' m' a' T; i3 ]HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 1 C. r6 D' _- P: a/ V
1 o; ~% X$ s: {) X: }2 G- @4 oTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. . V% h" d$ s, N
3 ^- L5 s9 F5 i/ r. zWalk naked to the bathroom.# d4 X( _" h* _7 a, z6 v
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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- j7 {( Y. a) dGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. ) `" G3 X, e) K- F0 j4 ~1 u
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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( m H+ L: e! Z# w' ^. L7 N; @6 [Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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8 C* l+ `4 Q( T6 yWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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, r# j, I- _7 W: f! t3 S! }Pee. " \4 X# V' M; y/ I8 S+ r* p
& e. m8 K ?+ `Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.% |8 f0 m' U: ?. m2 G6 ?3 n
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 0 J6 a- J3 T1 K5 ~
! I5 k% k+ l! ~Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. % n6 J) ~' i( w' ~' A$ n* U
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Throw wet towel on bed. , T% r1 C2 n6 t# y
) _7 f9 V& L4 S6 b: l* GIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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