 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
|
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 5 w) A, T) h1 }
1 c/ {# k7 U( J( a
" k+ O9 C, ~& e$ {; d--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
# p' O9 j! S4 F! X' {
1 v" }4 a4 {4 G+ T/ L/ z& b. o, F8 _
% z# i. u0 U# t" hTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
4 Y7 _3 |: v4 q: d M/ O; j1 J6 f3 H, r$ M. Z3 L* I1 x
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
0 W, f6 W0 {- x8 A+ h
, N; {9 A* i- Q8 C4 D) P/ d$ y5 D% ?If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
# q8 J# E. p( S+ C+ j1 {
" j( B, I N3 Z9 i6 V- m- N) a0 X0 N aLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 7 ?" T1 K: \# @" n
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
2 a0 K: x X0 b* a% D. k0 v7 f% B8 R" ~* s( v" ]; k' x
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. . w, z+ o3 A* {! F' W7 P& x
$ X6 N! O' I! \; B q
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
3 X: L3 \: S8 N- {
% E; l f. \5 w2 E( hWash your hair again to make sure it's clean., |7 ~( {; J1 K
" S6 {' {% I- P# H- P
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..* ]2 S5 t+ P8 [4 t. H
: L- m, z4 r; i0 ^2 T4 ]Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
. E$ O! f& I$ p
2 [& }. D2 a+ I( ~- ?1 WWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. p4 ~% M0 y4 \0 j
4 a0 o; h: x4 z# h- HRinse conditioner off hair.3 D7 m+ Z8 q; @
; b4 p: `- H) i( h3 g0 i" |& Y
Shave armpits and legs.
7 h( n) d, [& b) q
1 K2 Y- i: c& J! f4 d/ @8 S! xTurn off shower.
: o& f; I+ o! ~$ P- c R& a; n( o. A
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
`* g# U" B! ^0 ?1 k$ h" R" J5 O% i
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
3 I3 Z5 ~3 r K2 W8 u F; \9 d7 x6 P. A7 @8 a c' ^4 G% V
Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
. J! J7 d _ B, e1 U h" i q3 Q$ Q$ R
5 }, U; D3 Z+ y4 m. D' _Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
( _' P. i: P+ g" n" b- O. P6 O! D( f& L; J$ r) ]2 T7 t5 @
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 8 u+ q/ f% K) H) s
9 F( _6 x4 |9 ^
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. , c; g& L$ L. o
+ \$ z# P# F$ U% _9 ]0 A
$ [: h; w8 B, }HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: / I" g; i2 @: H& S
' m& D, T# C7 V5 |4 tTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 7 B* q" A4 B4 @* i! d! u
! a6 q3 n2 X. X9 C
Walk naked to the bathroom. V6 S9 _2 c; i# ]9 P- Y
/ y5 g* i0 q1 b3 @6 i- ?
If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
( @3 G( a8 v% m9 h6 {. _
1 L' i$ L% u# O( I& _Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
1 W( t: m' k9 ~5 b9 R# \: q5 i% w' H. T
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. # Q8 t7 o9 i& o# F q0 U
- R. s: g$ O& ]+ J O
Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
6 a0 q$ D$ p; k+ h% R- l
3 w5 ^7 v9 H: E2 Y5 JBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. / ^# l: [* Z0 `) Q1 P
- L- F* M' X9 f) m S& V4 `6 |Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
4 N6 x1 m- H* J( C; \% A: b: g9 F3 @$ }4 Q3 ~0 o, J2 j
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. - D1 G7 s( W9 i1 a! ?
. X2 G( x+ R/ ^( NWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
- Z# Q# R2 f" S T0 Q+ b$ o$ n/ r) }2 L8 o- ^9 Q8 R% V9 r9 S
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
" X! ^4 j& W: u, Z- ~% l
& v: p, G) {4 ?+ U, ^* EPee.
3 g- H4 v5 O, X9 b/ H6 [" Y4 `# u
7 S5 Y5 \9 g6 Q4 PRinse off and get out of shower.
2 w5 D7 G( b, \ f1 F" E0 e! b" }2 G2 Q
4 z `. \+ ~& k7 {6 b" PPartially dry off.9 h# \: o6 f+ j8 R! U+ a
9 e; i+ H( f7 [) ~& }
Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. I' j- d( _+ a
4 y5 V4 u8 Y) F) F. Z5 f. {# T' b5 tAdmire wiener size in mirror again. - j' X: E7 `' M( ^) X
7 ^* z( c. g& lLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
0 M, Z6 m7 Y5 a) G# U C: K& r9 _. m4 V4 j4 ?4 S1 |- Y" d
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
5 [; y. A" M+ Y$ M5 @3 I8 @/ c K& e" s& U. Z! Z3 a% J
Throw wet towel on bed.
8 w7 g7 E8 C% G$ U# b5 w x1 c' p
; N( Z p* ~3 H+ Q1 }If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
