 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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( f; @6 y! Y$ G$ [! C8 @9 ^/ }Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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5 z9 y9 m3 z( P2 g& d" OIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.( g$ x! T' ]# D& B, C. \; k0 Q
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- $ A+ b6 Z. m! B4 y! E5 U. [4 u3 a
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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, U& s4 O6 {! C8 x1 }& U, ]( xGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.6 [. Q; q! U: s
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..! q+ N, m& O/ j2 N# B
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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$ H- e# Y( H2 qWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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7 m) I8 G# @- ]6 g& V. H2 xShave armpits and legs., |4 J' Q* T$ J5 P8 [) w
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Turn off shower.' t+ K- z' |$ d9 }5 p# I$ H
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. ; R, X7 v1 x7 i# m9 p
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 8 d5 d, `. ]4 A5 m
- d: Y" h% D0 c; H# P) _% vWrap hair in super absorbent towel. ' I7 O m* L, u* J
; ]" H W' G$ }, y6 t1 Q; bReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. * [# k7 Y% L" g1 M9 I
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& J; ]4 s% a6 p8 k, |" j G7 zHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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$ |5 N; U1 Q6 P9 TTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 0 P4 `6 P( e2 g9 n
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Walk naked to the bathroom.7 s$ ^' [: R0 ^& m F- N6 s" N) G6 y
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 2 k- n+ d) }' a4 E n
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. ' _- s4 V: p+ e1 y' Z9 L5 S
! _5 w R% [) GAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. / {& a* H' r# i- k( Z3 L: s9 R
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. & h# [3 G6 ]' @% |) w, ]
$ d8 x' \3 n9 p# i& R2 ASpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. / ?# e$ G1 V: b* X
( J/ ]5 e- N+ j7 W. w/ b$ aWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ( m6 n. s& b% D' v; H- Z
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. 7 F) O" s" ?0 e& o
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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7 p! |. W7 [& Y6 a0 o' SAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. / ^1 H! [2 ~% F! h
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. - f$ D4 D% ?+ M
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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, z6 ]1 m/ Z) M }9 X$ R! e- iIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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