 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : 3 y" ^* E9 Q. H9 X" S
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.) Y; m* `1 u. I1 R$ _$ D
7 }6 o( R. i: b- [' \" LWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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* M1 F- b0 P# w) RIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.7 I+ y/ N; {# e
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
" u6 v: R0 M) C% a! H8 Kmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.) r J& e7 Q. x( ^0 q
9 p! i* u3 p! c4 H3 Z- a7 IGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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7 [0 b. p/ Z0 [5 eWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.: P( m' M$ c2 H* |$ r
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..0 Q- C* z0 K+ J, A* X
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. " F6 U4 ^4 B1 y
( O8 u! m0 O8 |3 p7 iWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. . f* M! v4 A& u8 C
, W+ S/ N" Z. }3 `9 {% i; Y& m& |0 ORinse conditioner off hair.: [: V" {+ a5 M5 X
: Y6 o: o- P) k4 ]" {Shave armpits and legs.
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# q: p& H: d; J6 G" C2 f" m% zTurn off shower.
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`4 x1 J$ r, \Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.7 N8 A0 L4 a. o6 `% K+ ]- S
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. , o; R4 C' N6 K$ l) O
$ t% Z' \& }4 z3 xGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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. M6 q1 R' R1 X$ H4 A4 EReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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& L2 P' y8 q7 j# p$ c/ m( ZIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. ( L. }9 D3 U8 ]& Y8 d+ o) l
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. ' f" P4 _& j: o# i1 J& P4 E
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Walk naked to the bathroom.* }0 R$ F4 T. {) u- _. ~1 |: _3 ~
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 2 p: y! o5 U H1 n# B
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. ; S$ U, c: a9 Z" a
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. & ~- N2 s' m' R3 M, W- Q
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 9 @6 M/ u* r: A! L3 D
7 |6 E6 H0 U! M( RSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. ! \$ A) z0 }% ^# S5 X# a, L
h& F2 R% V+ lWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 7 S; v: c2 W1 h- h
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. , s& o9 t, l* |3 |( k; _$ b
- U' _& c4 v% {& |2 NLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ; B% T' J+ d) j9 D
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Throw wet towel on bed. $ A" P- T: g* n8 D/ h
$ O3 E* C2 N; Y+ j: l9 |$ m; gIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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