 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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2 I6 N) ^" M5 `Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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7 Z) u3 ~4 k9 P8 M/ d9 GWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ( p- m1 V& }2 `, a; p/ |! K
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.9 M. b$ m* l/ v" g
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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7 m0 G8 I+ ?) A4 y: W ]& @Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean." I7 i$ j; O' K& N* `6 S* o
; z2 a S/ [. W6 Z9 vCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..8 H5 `7 v) `$ i( d3 Q
) }1 z. Y4 |1 A7 p' ?Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. / }2 f' x( o2 Z, c
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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0 U+ N5 c2 Z, V3 `* V j$ tTurn off shower.! t5 i6 c, j7 T8 e
) c" V- G' V0 iSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.# E# t# h- I4 a5 J
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 9 j( ]1 }; C3 {6 @8 [
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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, N2 c3 s# W; S# ?. g+ h/ nReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 0 w. G% L4 i& N! t9 D, x
) E& e7 D. z0 f. DIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. # k, N. q$ U" l |% D4 g$ Q1 @) J, s
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$ Q# }7 c2 e- a D. o- s$ h1 z, t# O8 dHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: $ }' |' Z% p2 x
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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( W- O& o! R& e1 J# W) \Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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# r g- }. {0 v9 y* QLook at your manly physique in the mirror. 6 K" f8 s' R' h
( s9 j/ o% ]/ U# A& E& h! ?0 _4 uAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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. }# `7 ?8 z( QGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. 8 Q* c) S' J2 x+ Y
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. / r( O! s' N c! w" b' Y
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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) G/ C* D3 ~# |! U4 m+ lSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 4 M5 H: p' L( q+ q* x
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. + B' A5 R; H3 ~" B) [
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Rinse off and get out of shower. - T2 O2 L6 @3 i# u0 o8 [. c+ F
2 E- R9 A5 R" F+ B3 q- YPartially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 0 E2 C. w* f6 j1 H6 H6 u
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. $ j( {2 |$ b/ W4 T
8 l$ t- n& s7 H. [% cLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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