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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA$ x, c D! R( \; h3 l3 R. D0 I1 V* _
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. + A: y8 m4 ` U( G+ e6 V H
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
# Q- ^* M1 P$ K4 M# [; R9 t3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
( n5 B" [4 ?+ J. _+ E$ D7 I4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 4 V: \& I3 e$ M6 w7 G0 |+ F
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% z- v! v, Z( i2 E& E9 B4 W" ]TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
; |) c& ^7 q6 B7 }2. Ottawa who?0 Q; k# i& X3 a0 z& p! K1 c7 H/ s$ J
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. : |" F9 X H: Z
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 4 n# @/ `* s8 T! |# i* J
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
; p: h7 R0 E5 n6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. % \) ?$ l) b0 R; b* L1 a
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I T1 ?. t9 F- h1 N, k4 }! ATOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN 3 b' k6 ]' m; n: O
8 x" }- t% m) |3 X9 F3 j- l1. You never run out of wheat.
8 [( S$ i- E1 }4 Y4 ]1 g2. Your province is really easy to draw. 9 m4 I% ~2 D% ~
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
1 Y9 B4 c- \8 P4. People will assume you live on a farm. 8 T$ Z* x k2 x( @. V0 s# [
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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6 z5 I* @% u0 O5 P/ J/ U1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. / [' Z ?0 \/ |7 H$ G E y ~
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
, @( l/ `. r: f2 @- c3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. / K1 l3 Y' p3 y2 e
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 0 F/ Z# I* @% l& F3 k x0 U0 f& J
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. $ c& y8 l- m, A
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. 5 n* }$ B% E0 B& c
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. 5 L9 o5 t t" l! h: z. K( p
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
- V3 L+ Q5 a% s4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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/ |* W8 u; [# g# o8 ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC , r5 a- u3 ^+ r6 j
) T- f8 r* ]8 A! H! q8 J, ~; z1. Racism is socially acceptable
% W7 g% @/ e6 _& J2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
$ E) Y0 |' v5 z3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. 9 v, @* M5 m, x' i) K8 r
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo */ {5 x. m8 `/ I G0 @
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK ' b, K( o0 s5 y | ]5 B, O1 m3 `& L
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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* G0 P* K# q1 n# d c0 y1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. ( W6 ^9 A2 r$ a3 s8 |$ ~: P8 n7 x
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
1 M3 `1 p" R& e3 q9 \3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 5 ^$ @: r+ b l
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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8 ^, i( R) q# r+ nTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. . s; O% E, |$ r" \, V( a
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. ; i( x- v' C. I2 C$ t+ p. c" @) H" c
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. / c! u& g1 ]9 ]% f3 f4 q8 I3 E
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2 P" B# w0 E9 m8 }8 z: }$ l% _6 `TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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+ ?) b9 G) j3 m4 P. k1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
0 r- Z/ O0 ^9 A# S# G) ?# }( `, q7 F2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. ( T/ |! _7 T* L
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 4 c1 Y" Y* ~4 ?: M0 I; L( u) }% O
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
1 E# G6 A0 F2 U0 \! i5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. - t- p. m/ b6 G/ F
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 1 j8 c* `( n. a1 `1 j$ j, K" y
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" V& M+ q, g3 p. y9 ?$ RTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND & ~5 F" v8 O' N' M% l# r
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
! N5 k _' e$ `" g# h: q& W2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
2 b; Z5 T( j% P/ N) W, k e3. The workday is about two hours long.
5 ]2 C$ X* K( e% x7 y% V4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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